dating with anxiety.....

[normabates]

I am really starting to feel depressed, im 30 years old and everyone i know is getting married....all of my exs are married to their first or second wife. I cant let anyone get close to me because when they find out about my anxiety they leave me, my last ex and his family agreed that because i had anxiety i would make my exs life too hard...and if we decided to have children id find a way of screwing them up like me. I cant hold down a job, so i have to live with my parents, when people ask why i dont work i just laugh it off and change the subject because im always told i need to get over it. i really dont see how i am ever going to live a normal life...how i will ever find someone who could love me....im a complete mess....sometimes i wish i would go to sleep and never wake up, has anyone else had trouble with dating?

[Enduronman]

....im a complete mess....

Welcome Norma.

Make an appointment to see a doctor, and get a referral to a therapist too.
We've all gotta start somewhere friend.
Best wishes to you!

E-Man

[gypsylee]

I am really starting to feel depressed, im 30 years old and everyone i know is getting married....all of my exs are married to their first or second wife. I cant let anyone get close to me because when they find out about my anxiety they leave me, my last ex and his family agreed that because i had anxiety i would make my exs life too hard...and if we decided to have children id find a way of screwing them up like me. I cant hold down a job, so i have to live with my parents, when people ask why i dont work i just laugh it off and change the subject because im always told i need to get over it. i really dont see how i am ever going to live a normal life...how i will ever find someone who could love me....im a complete mess....sometimes i wish i would go to sleep and never wake up, has anyone else had trouble with dating?

Hi Norma (I like your nickname lol),

It's clichéd but if they left because of your anxiety, they probably aren't worth having anyway. You wouldn't want to get married and have kids with someone who doesn't accept you. I left my husband when my daughter was quite young because he not only made my anxiety worse, he wasn't very accepting of it.

You've got plenty of time to find someone. Try not to compare yourself to others, even though it's hard. Living a "normal" life isn't the be all and end all anyway.

Take care
Gypsy

[WestCanada05]

Both me and my girlfriend have anxiety/ depression. You would think this would be an awful relationship but its quite the opposite. Since we both understand how everything works we know when to be there for each other but also when to give each other space to deal with out own problems.

[Im-Suffering]

Both me and my girlfriend have anxiety/ depression. You would think this would be an awful relationship but its quite the opposite. Since we both understand how everything works we know when to be there for each other but also when to give each other space to deal with out own problems.

Looking at your future, because that is what I see, you will both be marvelous parents one day. You are working on those skills now together, so the relationship has purpose and meaning, more than meets the eye. I am not saying you will have a child together, that remains probable. But the skills learned because of your joint anxiety, and the handling one to the other in relations and communication will prove invaluable.

So take comfort friend, the future is bright and secure.