I can't get a grip! HELP!!

[Brans0605]

I have been taking Lexapro since January and at first, it helped so much. It took the full 8 weeks (possibly more) for me to get over the side effects and feeling the anxiety lift. I still experience a bit of nervousness but my issue currently is memory issues and/or feeling numb and zombified. I had never had thoughts or ideations of suicide until recently, after the news of Robin Williams passing. Symbolically, he was a big part of my childhood. Long story short, he helped me threw tough times (parents' abusive behavior towards one another, their divorce, etc.) I didn't know he suffered through the same thing as me and now it's harder than before. And usually when I think of suicide, I just think of the term and meaning. I never think of killing myself. It's so weird. I don't have a therapist I can talk to, she mainly is concerned with her current relationships with men and I'm just afraid of things not going right. I'm 26 years old, I have a great job and a wonderful partner. I just don't understand why I am having memory issues, fogginess, anxiety because of those and still feeling a bit on edge. IT's starting to affect my everyday life.
My dose of Lexapro is currently 10mg and I can but rarely take clonazepam .5 mg for my anxiety disorder. Any suggestions or experience with this situation or situations, would be gratefully appreciated!!

[Enduronman]

Welcome Brans!

It sounds like you have a doctor that's willing to work with you, but a therapist would also be a great approach in helping you to deal with things too.
You may also be ready for an increase in your Lexapro dosage after all this time as your body may just need a bit more of this medication to help you over this hump.
I also wouldn't be afraid to take the klonopin as needed for your anxiety, that's why its there.
Hopes for a better day friend!

E-Man.

[Anne1221]

I think you need a good doctor/counselor/therapist. This sentence in your post didn't make sense to me, so I don't know if you have a good therapist or not: "I don't have a therapist I can talk to, she mainly is concerned with her current relationships with men and I'm just afraid of things not going right." Get some help! Not at all surprising that the death of Robin Williams has triggered some things for you and it's time to get some help in dealing with it.

[Brans0605]

I'm terrified to even be on Lexapro. But more scared that Lexapro may be making me feel forgetful and have memory issues. :-( I did just change my therapist to maybe see if that will help.

I do appreciate your kind words and encouragement :-) Makes me feel better knowing I'm not completely alone throughout all this.

[Brans0605]

Anne -- I'm currently see a Pdoc and therapist. I did just make an appointment to see a new therapist because the one I had was to self involved and never really explained anything to me nor did she try to help me understand my anxiety. I am getting help. I've been getting help. So thanks.

[Anne1221]

I know what you mean. I went to a pschologist once who told stories about herself. That didn't help me a bit. Now I've found one who is great and he is so helpful.