Quote Originally Posted by forwells View Post
This is pretty much on the ball .

"""I can't even enjoy myself anywhere I go. My girlfriend tells me I have to STOP thinking about this and just think about something else, but I have taken psychology and know that when you focus on not thinking about something, you actually will think about it more. Pink elephants...."""

So think about it , its the running from something that keeps it there . Think of it like a bully , you stand up to it and then it will fade away . Honestly your thoughts are normal and everyone has them , its your anxious mind that is keeping them there and giving them more meaning than needed .
I think Forwells has it... don't run from it. Confront the feelings, experience the grief. I know it hurts and my heart goes out to you, but he's right... the more you confront it, the more it will subside. Is there a help group you could join? A church group, some kind of support group for people who are going through similar experiences?