List Something Positive You Did Today?

[Ponder]

I slept well in my Hammock last night Tail spin - About the meds, I will answer later if OK ... just not feeling well atm ... I need to go for a walk and think I will take a photo for the day. I spoke out in my walking with tree thread about religion and hope you are not upset with me. It's important I keep in good with my new friends on here. That is all for now ... I will return when feeling better to chat with you soon. Our medicine is an important topic for me. I thank you for asking ...again ... I will be back when I have walked some.

to all.

PS...I really appreciate you changing signature ... always inspiring in a refreshing way that gives new life. TY
wow ... I was learning poetry from one of Stephen fry's books ...awesome, only just realized the author of that quote. I wonder if he is the same person?

[tailspin]

I slept well in my Hammock last night Tail spin - About the meds, I will answer later if OK ... just not feeling well atm ... I need to go for a walk and think I will take a photo for the day. I spoke out in my walking with tree thread about religion and hope you are not upset with me. It's important I keep in good with my new friends on here. That is all for now ... I will return when feeling better to chat with you soon. Our medicine is an important topic for me. I thank you for asking ...again ... I will be back when I have walked some.

to all.

PS...I really appreciate you changing signature ... always inspiring in a refreshing way that gives new life. TY
wow ... I was learning poetry from one of Stephen fry's books ...awesome, only just realized the author of that quote. I wonder if he is the same person?

Hi Dave,

Hope you have a good walk and I'll look forward to your pictures!

The Stephen Fry I quoted does write poetry too. But he's most well known as an actor, a comedian and a journalist. However I just googled Stephen Fry poetry and I see he's written a book called "The Ode Less Travelled" which seems to be about helping people write poetry. Is this the book of his you mean?

I also like Stephen Fry a lot because he has Bi Polar Disorder and despite his great success financially and in his career he has made a couple of suicide attempts. I know that sounds like an odd reason to like him! But what I mean is, he is someone who really understands what mental illness is. And he has talked very publicly about his struggles with mental illness. I think the best hope we have as a society when it comes to de-stigmatizing mental illness is to have "celebrities" talking about it. Because - and often this is a very sad fact!! - people listen to celebrities and take note.

Stephen Fry is also very involved with a British charity (he is British) called MIND which is a mental health advocacy group which seeks to educate the public about mental illness and raise awareness.

Anyhow, despite his mental illness, Stephen Fry is still a very successful man who is profoundly intelligent, and also very funny. That gives me some hope!

[Ponder]

AWESOME! I knew there was a reason I like this guy - the way he writes in his book - YES that is the book I have. Thank you very much for the run down on this guy! I will look more into his stuff. for sure.

I went for a walk with my Son today. Really really enjoyed his company. He has just finished up school - dropped out of doing his last year - next year - But we dont mind at all. The pressure was sending him over the edge, and knowing too well wehre that can lead, he has our full support with what ever he wants to do! I have never seen him so eager to be more active - he wants to go on hiking trips and on my next camping trip. Seems he is much happier now, and I'm really thankful for that. So Yea --- had a really great day with my son and hoping we can make the bush walking more regular together.

Other good thing I did was learn about turning my photos into poster size prints. Just experimenting with joining small pieces of paper together - have to change the exposure, play with sharpening, adjust colors and so on - It fun stuff I like doing so happy I was able to keep myself being creative as well. It will be good to have my prints about the house, instead of just using Flikr or the internet.

AND - I had a shower - yep, not all us depressed folk shower everyday and with the latest water bill $300.00 , I aint in a rush to waste any more than we should. Owner wont fix the plumbing nor the electrics - then there is the washing to a teenage girl that changes her clothes 4 times a day .... Sigh ...

hmmmmmmmmm ................ I think that was enough----- Good to have my Son back.

Meds -------------- LOL ----- I'm buggered, not sure I can cover that.

I need to take back control - adjusting my dose, helps me do that - It keeps me on my toes, I have to be aware of my body when doing such things - being complacent in not such a good thing. It too becomes a rut - the medicine rut. I need to get more active as the side effects of obesity outweigh the meds --- I am using my pill cutter and keeping a close watch - I am struggling this summer with the heat and my weight - not good - will see what happens -

There is another psychological aspect to taking the meds - I will post on that later but I don't think its of much interest (more like a battle of wills - me verses the services and or requirement to be ill) Seriously - there is a point to that, just not in here for now. My therapist understands my need to up my energy, by reducing and sometimes I will even come of the antidepressants for a while - during this time, my body is as active as it should be! --- I am not being pushed constantly be employment services, I typically loose up to 20kg --- but yet to keep it up for a whole year, as welfare will suddenly treat me as cured and push me again --- I go backwards and act out as is that requirement to get the exemption to drop my fears - and this will go on and on and on as it has done for the last 30 YEARS! ............... add to the 30 moves in 20 years ........... Meds have their place, but I can't sustain the moving from place to place whilst all doped up --- I also fall into deep despair as the medicine seems to go past that point Vs physical condition --- I am naturally an active soul caught a shrinking prison - The time is coming for me to either make some kind of positive move - or otherwise , I't might very well be back to the hospital for me.

You know - there are the "actors" and then there are the actors, who've become the hoop they once jumped - I don't think I have many jumps left in me. Very sad, that the extreme is required before people will listen. We have had more than one person turning up to services with petrol cans ready to make a statement. I myself did such a thing at my local employment service, because they were not listening - I took a rope as well as petrol can - I pulled it out of my bag and told them exactly how I felt. That I wanted to do this at the welfare office - hang myself with a match at the ready. I was only showing them, because despite them having their hands tied and never knowing what one dept is doing from another - I did appreciate the poeple there - it's like a service for disabled people, so I knew I would not go through with anything - none the less, the police were called and all that - But again ------ it's hard for me to be me anymore. I cant learn in class, so fail all those courses - I can't take the judgment anymore - I am good in my own element, but can't take instruction when in the work place - my therapist tells me to accept that I will most likely never work again - this makes me a little sad, but for the first time I have met someone that was able to help me and make me feel its ok to be - non functional due to whatever - but then I get letters saying I have to go in and look for work - It does not make sense to me - one says one thing - put me on heavy antphycotic meds, then they want me to keep applying and failing everytime - I call it living the Lie - they even tell me to lie - They say don't tell them about you criminal record, don't tell the about goal, dont tell them about your anxiety, don't tell the about your medicine, But do tell them that you are confident, a go getter, bla bla blaaaa ----------

I can't do it anymore --- and you know something, the suicide rate is skyrocketing in this town - they cover up the stories and make things up. Hell, last year my daughter saw a 16 yol boy swinging from a tree - across from where she volunteered. Hiding this stuff and saying we cont talk about it, is wrong - ITS happening, and It's because too much expectation is put on people to survive -- always having to prove themselves for existing.

So about the meds --------------- believe me that there is an element that requires me to take them in order to be heard. When I am not on them, they treat me like I am cured....that is wrong! its plain wrong to treat people like that! People that suffer with major depression and anxiety that can get by without meds are to be encouraged for such strength. when I am no longer threatening to kill myself and or threaten others, no longer a risk and able to enjoy being human - that is no reason to start turning the thumbscrews all other again - but that's exactly what they do - it's why most of the mentally ill, have fits by the calender date, that "review date" - they feel compelled to act out - to act for the script writers that say whether they will be able to pay the rent or not ---

so again --- if you jump the hoop too many times, you will become the hoop - you will become the illness, the severity to which is required. You become the victim and adopt the mentality of which you are scorned. So jumping the hoops really does not work - just as always saying what is - is ------------- I'm so caught up, I feel guilty if I don't take the meds --- try and understand that! ------------ yet I know, although they help when I flip out --- having a break from them is quite beneficial and actually keeps the meds working then next time I start them.

Again ------------ I have gone on. But there is no easy answer to the meds for me. Its like handcuffs - being handcuffed and put in your place - if you cant work, then you must be medicated! Either your a hopeless case, or get there and get that job --- When we get to this new place we will be ridiculed for making such a move, did we ask the government first --- you know we have to do that with welfare, check before we move from one place to the next...... INSANE - us welfare cases ---

No where on the internet have I round anyone prepared to talk from the bottom of the barrel - like that religious banter I went on with - most will come in and attack - tell you have you should buck up and stop sapping of tax payers - tell you that the world would be better without you - that because of people like me, that's why the world is a bad place - no one has ever understood the viscous cycle of the welfare trap - the sorry sordid abused types have all brought it on themselves, they thought up there suffering and no one or system is to blame ---------------------

Sigh ................ I've pretty much been a fighter all my life ------- I just don't have it in me to be pushed and shoved about from place to place anymore ---- believe me, it's exactly like that when you have no professional reference to find a place to live let alone be that go getter to get that job. Mental cases, hard and tough nuts! - pure acid - can't be sustained - If only I could just be left alone. My wife it right - without a job, the world will not let you go. You can let go of them, but they will keep you in their grip -

Goodnight --- Thank you Tailspin and Dahila

[Dahila]

I envy you ponder walk with son, my moved away and my daughter .... oh that's a story ...but another time. something positive? I got up congested but I still do not have bronchitis ) I am taking my meds and wonder how long, am I stacked with the meds to the end of my life? Yeah take care Tailsping (I hope you got good news about your babies? ) Ponder take it easy, less emotions, take care

[tailspin]

Hi Dave and Dahlia! Really glad you had a good walk with your son, Dave! That sounds really special. Thanks for explaining more about your meds and the bigger picture surrounding them. I can see what a complicated relationship you have with them and I can understand why. It's great when psychiatric meds work, but for way too many people they are, instead, a bit of a poisoned chalice. I can see in my own experience that while the medication I take doesn't really help very much, when I've come off it, I've ended up a lot worse than before I started. To that I can only say, WTF?????

Also, I agree that suicide is a massive problem that is rarely talked about seriously, let alone in any kind of helpful way. There is so much more that needs to be done!!!

I'm really glad you're talking about all this. Thanks for sharing, Dave. I'm sending you good thoughts and really wishing for the best for you.

[tailspin]

Yeah take care Tailsping (I hope you got good news about your babies? ) Ponder take it easy, less emotions, take care

Thank you, Dahlia! I am STILL waiting to hear back about my doggie. It's ridiculous that the lab is taking this long. I have complained to the vet again today. My dog had the procedure done last Wednesday. That is a week ago! Even allowing for Thanksgiving, which delayed things a bit, the results should definitely be in by now. I can't stand this waiting. The vet promised she would have an answer for me later today.

Thank you for thinking of me!

[Ponder]

HI GUYS - feeling a lot better today!!!

Allow me to express for the both of us Dahila - regarding your most recent post in my other thread!

Roooooooooaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrr..........


home made poster by L_Plate_Dave, on Flickr

Is that awesome or what? I love it!!! They are nearly extinct you know - I can so relate to this poor guy.

Anywayyyysss --- I found some really great sources online - I've become a bit of a professional scavenger when it comes to sourcing such things online. These are free downloads and I have the link to - however it's rare to find files at this size with such detail. So far I have just about calibrated the various settings in my head - I have a good system now to try test prints with various online printing places. This one comes in at 30" with a PPI of 233.3 which is damn good for what it is.

I can still do some of my own photos, however I want to open the variety and provide a lot more in creative art as well -

LED lighting is my next point of call with framing as well. The LED lighting is more for showing the final product off in a Market Tent -
I have to work out the best budget sized prints - places - cheapest method for protective layering and all that -

Here it is on the wall a little further back, however I did not really capture the color temp well:
I think 30inch prints will look good with a boarder plus frame:

I wont be able to afford any more test print via outside services till after I move - That I leave in my wifes hand to decide.

None the less - I am writing down all the learning and will make a move on this after setting up in the new place in January some time.
I can source out more awesome pic and work on creating a library for these poster - make some of my own art as well.

Working on the color tone - as well - The "real viewing" tone is about half between these two photos. Only wish I could get this print done on a one piece protected poster page with boarder and frame

home made posters by L_Plate_Dave, on Flickr

Thanks for letting me share and the encouragement -

[Dahila]

Fantastic I love them. I would like to say something positive but is tough today. let see maybe there is something positive. I got the news in the morning that my best friend passed away night before. The person who was my shelter my supporter and was simply always for me. When I had a tough time going through the divorce and at the same time trying to take care of my kids and learn language, working as cleaner, delivering the papers, and you name it, I did it all. She was there......My heart is broken ..... The only positive is I could leave work early and make it to the funeral home to say goodbye. Even it was not proper, I could not stop crying. how the hell you say goood bye to someone you love...:?
Ponder we are similar in one thing, I also started to collect things for my new adventure; the home made soaps. If I am in one piece I will come back, if not you will know that I failed miserably and ashamed to show my face here...

[jerilyn]

Hi guys, I guess my positive today is that I had an appointment with my psychiatrist this morning and I had a good old cry and told him I don't think my medication is working well enough and that I'm feeling hopeless because I've already tried a lot of meds. I know this doesn't sound very positive!! But I did come away from the session feeling a bit better. I don't know why really since it's obvious there's no magic pill out there. But still he was reassuring that there are a number of other things we can try and we discussed a lot of options and I definitely came away feeling a bit more hopeful. He also suggested I get some more therapy so I'm going to look into that again too.

Psychiatrists can be a huge help! I took a few online tests, & my psychiatrist was able to put together things about my life that I never would have thought had any influence on each other. With those connections, SO MUCH about my current feelings came into perspective. Then he recommended therapy that also suddenly made sense! I have a long way to go, but understanding where the stress ACTUALLY comes from helps a great deal.

[Ponder]

I am deeply sorry for you loss Dahila. This is tragic, Is there anyone else you can trust to talk to in your immediate area?