Today I got out of bed and came to work even though the thought of it made me want to throw up. I could have easily called in sick. May not seem like much but it feels like a win
Hey guys. Thanks for sharing your positives. Have not visited this thread in a while because I'm in a mindset where I can't think of anything positive that I've done. One thing though, I have become more productive of late.
I wrote in another thread that I'm really worried about one of my dogs who has a lump on her leg that is likely cancerous and we're waiting to get the results of a biopsy she had done last week. This has ratcheted up my depression (and to a lesser extent my anxiety) no end (I should explain that my dogs are everything to me. They are my children. They are with me 24 hours a day and they are literally my world. It would not be physically possible to love them anymore than I do!!)
Anyhow, waiting for the results is really awful, but the one positive about facing this health problem with one of my dogs is that it has forced me to keep busy, in order to try and distract myself from the awful thoughts of what it will mean if she has cancer. I have actually been able to throw myself into work and get a lot done. Also, something like this helps me with my perspective. It shows me what really matters and so I am (slightly) less inclined to waste my energy getting really worked up about things that don't matter that much (which is what I generally spend a lot of my time doing).
Anyhow, that's my positive at the moment: that despite my depression being awful, I am forced into productive action in order to distract myself.
Wishing everyone well xxxxxx
Last edited by tailspin; 12-01-2013 at 04:10 PM.
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tailspin I know what you feel, My late lab got the cancer under her nail. We amputated the finger and after some time of adjusting she was just fine. I hope yours is going to be fine too. I started to think that maybe the food we give them is not the best. Fillers are usually GMO corn, and they put as much chemicals in it as in our food. Keep us posted, maybe you get the results and it is going to be benign, I keep my fingers crossed.
I got to talk to my very best friend that I haven't talked to in 3 months!
"Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'"
Guy's ... I am sorry I can not reciprocate today. Very very tired.
Did more yard work ...
a few other things as well ...
I reacted some today, but more so on a ... long term behavioral pattern reaction (which I noticed as it happened although I allowed it to continue more than I should of) ... I did deal with it though and now still focusing some to let go, for when the unavoidable confrontation comes to be. So that in itself is a positive thing I guess. I'm kind of not thinking about it by focusing on letting it go Now, before the time arrives - if any of that makes sense. Bla bla
Inspirational of you Johanna to share as you do, with all that is going on as it is. Thanks for you helping with the energy - so to speak.
Best wishes to everyone else and great to see this part of the forum picking up as well. Very grateful for that.
Forgive for now I choose to coal lapse ... but with a smile I can muster. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Thank you, Dahlia! I know you are a huge dog lover also. I'm so glad your late lab was able to recover from the cancer under her nail. But I'm so sorry she is gone now. They just don't live long enough!! I've never understood why a dog's life is so short. Even cats live way longer!Originally Posted by Dahila
I'm still waiting on the results of the biopsy. The Thanksgiving Holiday last week slowed everything down because the laboratory was closed. But I should get the results tomorrow.
I did get some good news about one of my other dogs though. I was worrying about her blood work because one of her test results was abnormal when she had some lab work done recently, suggesting a problem with her kidney function. The vet wanted to re-test her blood and I got those results back today and everything is normal, so that is a big relief.
Thank you, Dahlia!!
Remember, you only live once. That's why it's so important to spend at least 15 hours a day on the internet seeking validation from total strangers - Chris Rock
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Hey Dave, I hope you're getting some rest and wake up feeling refreshed! Well done for recognizing a reactive pattern and now working to let it go. I know how hard that is!!!!Guy's ... I am sorry I can not reciprocate today. Very very tired.
Did more yard work ...
a few other things as well ...
I reacted some today, but more so on a ... long term behavioral pattern reaction (which I noticed as it happened although I allowed it to continue more than I should of) ... I did deal with it though and now still focusing some to let go, for when the unavoidable confrontation comes to be. So that in itself is a positive thing I guess. I'm kind of not thinking about it by focusing on letting it go Now, before the time arrives - if any of that makes sense. Bla bla
Inspirational of you Johanna to share as you do, with all that is going on as it is. Thanks for you helping with the energy - so to speak.
Best wishes to everyone else and great to see this part of the forum picking up as well. Very grateful for that.
Forgive for now I choose to coal lapse ... but with a smile I can muster. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Remember, you only live once. That's why it's so important to spend at least 15 hours a day on the internet seeking validation from total strangers - Chris Rock
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Hi guys,
I guess my positive today is that I had an appointment with my psychiatrist this morning and I had a good old cry and told him I don't think my medication is working well enough and that I'm feeling hopeless because I've already tried a lot of meds.
I know this doesn't sound very positive!!But I did come away from the session feeling a bit better. I don't know why really since it's obvious there's no magic pill out there. But still he was reassuring that there are a number of other things we can try and we discussed a lot of options and I definitely came away feeling a bit more hopeful. He also suggested I get some more therapy so I'm going to look into that again too.
Last edited by tailspin; 12-02-2013 at 10:08 PM.
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Thanks Tailspin ... glad to hear you are getting some help and making some ground.
Today I helped my youngest daughter move out of the house and met the father to be - it's been a big secret because my daughter is embarrassed of me. I'm sure some people here will understand how that goes.
Last night I was woken up in sleeping in my yard, by workmen working on the power lines at midnight ... banging and drilling. So made a post in here somewhere other. I managed to throw a thin mattress into my hammock to spoil myself with tonight - it's from one of those small fold up beds -similar- many of used use to sleep on in the 70's when doing sleep overs - seems like I should be comfy tonight.
I've done ok with cutting my antidepressants back to half dose over the last 4 days ... so far so good - still on my quitepine though.
Hmmmmmmmmmmm ... cleaned the kitchen up after about 3 days build up - LOL - I'm over due for a shower, so might do that tonight before heading outside to call it a night.
wishing you all well. Good Night.
Hi Dave! That would drive me nuts being woken up by workmen late at night. In fact, that did happen a few months back. I yelled a few choice words but I doubt they heard as it was off in the distance.
Well done on your positives today! How come you are cutting back on your anti-depressant? Do you mind if I ask what meds you are on. I know you take Seroquel, but what anti-depressant do you take? I"m just really curious about medication right now as I'm still trying to figure out what to try next.
Hope everyone is having a good - or at least, a bearable - day!
Remember, you only live once. That's why it's so important to spend at least 15 hours a day on the internet seeking validation from total strangers - Chris Rock
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