Can't Switch Off!!

[Meche]

That's my problem! It's a real silly thing to be saying but I don't know how to shut my mind off and relax and this I think is causing alot of my current anxiety issues. I'm a thinker, always have been, probably always will be. Examples; when I'm doing one task I'm thinking fo the next task (or 2-3) I need to do, when I'm at work I think about thing's I need to do at home and when I'm at home I go over my work day and what needs doing tomorrow. My house always has to be clean/tidy and I cannot sit down until it's how I think it should be (my tidy house/tidy mind theory obvisouly doesn't work :rolleyes:)!!, when I do sit down I fidget and get bored with what I'm watching/reading and feel like I should be off doing something else. When I try to chill out by having bath my mind is still racing with random thoughts (anything/everything). I can't think of a time I am ever switched off and my brain in overloading. It's been worse lately because alot has happened over the past 6 months and I know I have a stressful few months ahead and I've become very run-down and aware that big changes are needed within my life. I'm still thinking about all that!!! Joking aside, I feel like I need to take time out and make sense of everything but I don't know where to start. At the moment I carry on with my 'normal' life but I'm getting frustrated. This is where my anxiety has kicked in and I've got myself into a bit of a state. Any comments/advice would be much appreciated. xx

[jessed03]

I was a vast thinker like you. Almost 24/7 thinking. Missing everything infront of me. Never in the moment, always away somewhere. Here's what helped, and it's so easy that we all know it, but overlook it. People think we must spend hours and hours, years and years, challenging them, focusing on certain ones, analysing them, working them out. That method works, and can make people feel better, but what a huge effort, when the answer is actually so simple.

Don't make sense of everything! Or even anything! Leave it all to be. Every drop of it. The only way a person can ever confuse themselves is by trying to understand something. If you aren't trying to understand something, it can't possibly confuse you. You're simply looking.
The sooner you realise the process of thinking has a mind of it's own (You have that classic British humour, so I put that pun in just for you:)) the quicker you realize there's no need to play any part in it.

The way to let your mind become clear, is like dirty water. If you keep shaking it, trying to find certain things, it will never settle. Let it all become clear. Let it all settle. Find nothing. Search for no understanding. Search for no peace. Those things exist, but you will find they don't exist in the mind. They exist beyond the mind. The saying goes 'Peace of mind', not 'Peace in mind'. You could live forever and 90% of thoughts still would never make sense. Nobody ever really said they had to. We just sort of believed they did.

When you're having a bath, and you have thoughts of getting out; What does that matter? The water stops being warm? Your skin suddenly dries? Of course not. :) You see? Every sensation is still there. The smell of the shampoo, the sound of water. You just aren't looking at them. When doing dishes, and you're thinking of going to the pub, a cool pint of lager appears in your hand? Sadly not, your hands are still in soapy water. The only difference is you've focused your attention inside, and not outside. You gave so much attention to the stories going on inside your head, that it's a habit now, to focus awareness there. You have one awareness, one attention, one consciousness, whatever people want to call it. You place it in a place you want, or choose. Right now you're in the habit of placing it in the mind. When you notice it is there, gently take it out, and focus on where you want it to be. Maybe in the real world, in that case focus on the smell of the washing up liquid. That lemon smell seems deeper now you're concentrating on it. When you notice you're back in thought, gently remove your attention, and place it into the warm sensation of the water on your hand. If you feel anxious, or frustrated, same principal. Take the attention out of the frustration, or anxiety, and place it somewhere else. Even if sleeping, place it in the sound of silence.

This is meditation. But while awake. You'll find you live more. Mike in an earlier post said he meditated on the taste of raspberries. VonnHelsing meditates to the sound of music. People who aren't sure of meditation may say 'Thats not a method'. A wise man would say 'These two people clearly understand'

But it won't last long. It can be a lifetime habit of placing attention in the head. So keep gently doing it, for some it happens very quickly. For deeper thinkers such as you and I, it becomes a longer process. Over a few months you will find a far greater degree of clarity. But don't think you have to, because that's a trap, that's a thought too ;)

Thoughts need your attention to live. Like weeds. While they have attention they will stay, they will grow larger. The more you take it away they will shrink. But they want it back. They'll suck you in with promises of relived memories, of problems, of conflict, of allowing you to imagine your dreams. But you know none of that is real. They will still be there a little. The feelings around them will still be there a little. They may be there in the background slightly. That is ok.

But you have simply turned away. 'No thank you. Not right now'. Your body will understand over time. It is there to give you what you require of it. When giving interest to these thoughts, you tell it it's necessary. You have one attention, and you put it in there, how could a thing be more important? By taking it out, the body soon realizes, this is no longer needed, and your thoughts will calm right down, to only the necessary, joyful ones. Thought is a bad master, but a good servant. No matter how real they seem, how interesting, how vital to life they appear, how entertaining, how tempting the stories and idea's are... always remember...

'Not even the greatest salesman in the world can sell something to you, if you do not buy'

[anxiousmess]

well said, jessed. i can't add anything to that to :)
i'm going to try and pay attention to that too!
i have tried meditation in the past, only i've let my mind take control again. definitely going to try this though! thanx, jessed