Newb needs help with anxiety disorder

[ce1221]

Hi, I just found this site and basically found out what my problem is. During middle and high school I had no problems with public speaking, I used to do school plays and read in front of everyone in church. I joined the marines and suddenly after boot camp and training, I cannot speak in front of people. Ive ran to the bathroom to stay out of classes where i would have to read. I get extremely nervous and my voice gets very shaky. It feels like my heart is about to explode out of my chest. Im trying to become a police officer and at my first interview i did extremely well. Took deep breathes and relaxed before going in. (i can rarely suppress it). On my second interview, I used the same techniques. When I entered the room, I felt out of control nervous and my voice was shaky throughout the entire interview. The people even asked me why im so nervous and sometimes people pick up on the shakiness and ask my why i talk like that. Its extremely embarrassing. Ive tried herbal products like Purecalm and Mindsoothe but they dont seem to help. I dont have any problems speaking to friends, family, or people I know. Its just when its a group of people or sometimes even a single person that I dont know. Ive decided not to go to college because of this problem and the fear of having to do presentations or read in class and sound really weird. I feel like this is going to effect my future if I dont cure it. Ive been to Iraq and Ive done some crazy things in my life that im not afraid of, But once it comes to speaking, im deathly afraid!

Ive also noticed that I get uncomfortable around people that I dont know and its hard to make converation but i force myself to. Im not shy at all, and I love to talk to people if im in a relaxed mood. But other then that I just cant do it. Please help!

-C

[ce1221]

anybody??????????

[MrsSandraD]

I also have this problem. It really interferes with my life - in jobs, at weddings, social gatherings.

I'm going to face this fear head on and join a public speaking group - look for a local Toastmasters in your area and explain what you want to achieve - small steps in overcoming your public speaking fear.

I hear the more we do it the less daunting/scary it will be.

I think that's the only way to stop it - unless we want to just avoid it (and that just makes it worse and worse as time goes on).

Let me know what you do.

[BIG HUGS!] I know how difficult this can be.

[ce1221]

I also have this problem. It really interferes with my life - in jobs, at weddings, social gatherings.

I'm going to face this fear head on and join a public speaking group - look for a local Toastmasters in your area and explain what you want to achieve - small steps in overcoming your public speaking fear.

I hear the more we do it the less daunting/scary it will be.

I think that's the only way to stop it - unless we want to just avoid it (and that just makes it worse and worse as time goes on).

Let me know what you do.

[BIG HUGS!] I know how difficult this can be.

Ive had to conquer it head on. Being in the marines I have to teach classes and take job interviews. Everytime, I start off totally nervous. My voice shakes like crazy but towards the end of the class I get more realxed and do fine. But everytime I have to do it again I get the same results. I dont care if I have to be nervous I just cant stand the voice shaking. Everybody thinks Im about to cry when its not even like that.

[MrsSandraD]

I can relate totally....in my last job I avoided the first Monday of every month as I had to give a report in front of about 20 board members. No one questioned why I was sick on those days but the thoughts of speaking in front of them made me literally sick to my stomach - but like you, by the end I was speaking fine. It was the initial speaking that felt really really bad. (shaky, numb, like in a tunnel). Not good at all.

Since then I've avoided any jobs which entail any sort of speaking in front of groups. Weird thing is that in an interview, I always feel confident and do very very well - even if there are 3 people asking questions. I think the number of people do it for me - if any more than 3 or so, I then feel as if I have an audience.

I'm told Toastmasters will help so I'm checking them out. This cannot continue to hinder me in my career and social life. Sucks.