Advice on medications- I've tried a bunch

[nervousnelly12]

Hi guys,

I'm new here. I have had anxiety/panic my whole life. It seems to get worse whenever I'm in stressful situations. I just started a job that is making me not only mentally sick but physically sick. I wake up shaking having a panic attack almost every night thinking about the next day. I am a new teacher, so I stress about my lessons all the time.

I've been to a psychiatrist a long time ago, but she was a pill pusher and didn't help talk therapy-wise. I've been on Effexor, Celexa, Wellbutrin, and possibly BuSpar? Maybe klonopin? She was prescribing so many things when things weren't working, I lost track. The Effexor and Celexa made me a zombie and sweaty. I still got totally anxious around my period (like 2 weeks before it!). I also have had xanax 0.5mg as needed. For years, I've just been taking that as needed, but now this isn't even working to help me sleep and take my mind off things.

I went to talk therapy last Spring and it did help, but only temporarily. I'm thinking I need to do a combo of talk therapy and medication, but I'm not sure what type of medication would work based on my history.

I called in sick for Monday and sent it sub plans. The thought of going back to that job makes me sick. It's only a 3 month stint, and my mother said she could give me money if I needed to quit (which would be about half of what I'd get if I stuck it out), but I don't know if I should. I asked them for a mentor (via email) and I'm waiting for them to respond and see if me calling in after 4 days on the job is going to get me fired. I'm just so overwhelmed and feel lied to about the work and information/support I'd have.

What meds have worked for you that make your brain stop worrying 24/7? I'd like to not feel guilty for trying to relax/take time for myself.

Also, how did you go about finding a good psychiatrist in your area? I'm going to go to the doctor or talk to her come hell or high water because I'm so miserable and need to get a start on overcoming this anxiety.

[alankay]

Nelly, you absolutely need to resume seeing an MD/DO. I don't like to go stampeding down the med trail but you don't want to lose this job if at all possible. Sooner or later you'll need to work on this anxiety issue. I did.
Can you speak to your boss or is that ridiculous? I mean do you know that would be useless? If in doubt I'd do it to buy some time. Get to an MD. In fact a family doc/GP might be best. That psychiatrist was doing poly-pharmacy(many drugs) when it should be(but can't always be) avoided.
First tell your boss you're having health issues(I don't think can ask much as for the details) and am going to the Dr. ASAP and you will be calling back to update them. Also tell them you plan on being back soon(they will assume stomach/OBGYN/virus issues, etc.)
If you can find a good family doc tell him all your history. If you want to finish this job for money and work history reasons ask him for help. Specifically, for the short term, you will need to treat symptoms(not ideal but.....). What are the symptoms at work? Mental anxiety/panic? Racing heart/tremor? .5 mg xanax is low dose so you'll need a longer acting med at a little higher dose for the school day so klonopin/diazapam or perhaps ativan could be used for the anxiety/panic. If you have a racing heart/tremor/shaking maybe some atenolol or propranolol(beta blockers for stage fright symptoms, disregard if not applicable). Also taking an SSRI like celexa/zoloft/fluoxetine which will take time to help but the benzo and beta blocker will work now. The strategy will be to preserve your job/job reference by using the quicker acting meds to lower you anxiety now and taper down over a period of weeks as the SSRI takes over. I would ask the doc about this type of strategy. I bet once you get rolling at work and are actually coping well you be relieved at that alone and be able to taper down the benzo and beta blocker doses OK. You'll be desensitizing yourself so to speak
Now if you really aren't worried about the job, skip the benzo but do get treatment by a GP to start. You need to start somewhere as this will just be status quo.
I say keep the job for another reason. Aviodance. You don't want to let anxiety win this battle. Anxiety is a bully and I've learned that coping with a tough situation is better assisted by short term meds than avoiding it thus allowing anxiety a victory.
Print this page and sit down with the doc and see what he thinks. You'll need to follow though on any recommendations he has going forward or it won't work. He won't do it. He'll recommend a therapist but that will be a very good idea. He/she can help support you with this strategy if the doc approves as taper down can be a bit hard but doable(you will need to comply with that part, very important). But it's the only scenario I can come up with other than bite the bullet and going in but you sound very anxious and not likely to be able to do that. PM me any time. Also I'd be willing to help via e-mail if you are so inclined. Alankay

[alankay]

The idea is to reduce/control symptoms. You're not screwing with the brain chemistry so to speak. All benzo's do is inhibit the activity by enhancing the natural inhibitor already there(GABA). SSRI's just keep serotonin in the nerve gap a bit longer which is helpful. Yes, meds, in particular benzos, are best used in acute(high) anxiety states or occasionally in certain situations. This is all part of an effort to get you back clamed down and functional a then work on the longer term things to keep you anxiety under much better control.
Kodos to those who can take it and keep looking for other things/means more acceptable to them. I chased my tail for quite some time before finally getting treatment and listened to the doctor instaed of me telling him how to treat me.:) Alankay