Procrastination and Distraction

[AsktheAges]

Something I've been coming to realize is that I procrastinate a little because there's a part of me that likes the feeling of being under pressure, that likes that stress/anxiety. If I put off preparing a lecture until 6 am on the day I have to give the lecture, I know I'm going to work really efficiently when I get to it. If I do it in the afternoon on the day before, I'll be constantly fighting distraction. I'll also be constantly second-guessing every idea I have, thinking about whether there's a better way to do it, worrying about how things will come off, etc. This may well actually lead to a great lecture. However, if I'm under the gun, I know that I'll quickly get done what needs to get done in order to deliver a perfectly adequate class and, basically, won't 'need' to think so much.

Does anyone else deal with this? How do you overcome it?

(I'm probably procrastinating marking essays right now.)

[AsktheAges]

OK, so now that I've been trying to get the marking done well ahead of time, I see what it is: it's just damn boring and tedious to do work! (Plus, all the stuff I mentioned earlier.) If I'm under intense time pressure, the adrenaline rush makes it more exciting. I guess the only way to deal with it is to suck it up and force myself to do the work ahead of time, switch off the Internet, give myself breaks, etc.

[AsktheAges]

I seem to be talking to myself here. Still, I tried to fight this last night. I set aside two hours in the evening to prep my one-hour class today. I spent about 1.5 h of that obsessing over a problem that is quite intriguing but that is really tangential to what I needed to cover in class. Much of my time was spent just neurotically mulling over what I actually wanted to cover. Then I passed out. I ended up getting up very early, preparing really intensively, but then delivering a bit of a weaker class because I was so distracted and tired. I got through maybe half of what I prepared.

[AsktheAges]

Hm,thanks. Was hoping to avoid new meds though. It's not exactly a new thing, just a habit I don't like.

[tonic321]

I find your post really interesting. Is it a pattern you want to get out of? I reckon it's one of those self-discipline issues that aren't that easy to resolve and take work. I know how hard that is.
I'm on the other side of the coin, a procrastinating student. The difference is, it really isn't working for me.
I'm very uncomfortable with study because in my head I am not good at anything - study, work, anything. But i desperately want to finish my degree. In school i was a good student I got very good grades, since my anxiety I feel like a total failure. Leaving things until last minute leaves me in a total heap, but I keep doing it. To me as a student lecturers seem like in another world almost, my own anxiety manifesting itself into a fear of lecturers. I liked your post because it's made me think of lecturers a bit more like myself.

[AsktheAges]

A professor is basically someone who has made a career out of studying/being a student. Lectures are like epic class presentations. Scholarly publications are like epic term papers. We are really not so different.

I do want to get out of the pattern for a few reasons:
i) I think my classes (and everything else) would be better if I didn't procrastinate. I would actually have the time to do additional reading and be extra-confident with the material rather than just preparing the minimum to deliver a class.
ii) This pattern causes me a great deal of anxiety. I worry about the class the day before and then I get very anxious when it's not prepared yet: I shouldn't be letting anxiety motivate me. I know that anxiety makes me a worse teacher.
iii) Something could come up at the last minute that needs my attention.
iv) I am not getting much done other than teaching, and I need to if I want to compete. Better work habits and a calmer frame of mind would probably help here.