not going to make

[gadguy]

Not sure why I am posting other than to vent my frustartion, with me. I have had anxiety attacks forver, but when it developed into night terrors i was put on Lexpro. Thas been about 3 years ago I guess, low dosage 15mg. Everything was great...i felt great had confidence and was actually liveing for the first time in 40 plus years!! Silly me thought it was me and was better.

I asked Dr about coming of med as i felt i could handle the world onmy terms now, i had this problem licked. The Dr said it was a descion Ihad to make myself and also because it was a low dosage i could quit cold turkey when i was ready.

I am now into my 3rd week off of lex. I have gone through the blinding headaches, dizzines confusion etc... I seem to be over those now.

Now my old buddy Mr anxiety is back! along with extreme anger and rage and I am an emotional roller coaster. I hate the person/loser I see in the mirror, I miss the self confident guy that was there...I am not liking the real me.

I think what is wrong with me, why can't i be normal??

Anyway I manageing to hold it together although yesterday I just about shut down at work....

Sorry to vent so but I have know one to talk to about this, very few people know i was an anxiety meds and my fam would just think it a sign of weakness and i don't need that..I'm hard enough on myself with their help.

[worrier123]

Hi, sorry to hear your having a crap time i feel for you. you have been on meds for a very long time, dont be so hard on yourself! i have only just started taken meds infact this is my second day but im sure if you contact your dr they will reasure that what you are feeling is probably normal. the thing with me is that i never wanted to be on meds cos when the time came that i had to get off them id think to myself what if it all comes back and what if i get worse than before, and of course cos your thinking it youv planted the sead and the more you worry about it your watering the sead and then of course it grows and grows. I guess with anxiety sufferers like ourselvs its changing the way you think about things(which i havnt really mastered myself) im going to start therapy soon to have some CBT sessions which will teach us to think differently, maybe you should give it a try too

and ps you are not a looser and you are not alone....dont forget that!!


much love x