I think I am going to be sick..

[lingling]

I can't being myself and having my mind, my mind is just fucking with me at every second of every minute. My thoughts are just everywhere. Its always my head making up these things that aren't even there. I feel like my life and I are getting torn apart more and more each day. My relationships with everyone are getting ruined. Soon I'm probably going to have no one or something is going to happen to someone and I'm going to kill (not literally) myself for it. I wish I could escape somehow.. Can't my anxiety and depression go away!?!

[lingling]

Thinking about it, I seriously wouldn't care if I died right now...

plus. I love how people never reply to my posts, awesome..

[jessed03]

Hey lingling.

It sucks you feel that way. I just want to offer you a little hope. I felt like you too, truly awful. I did want to kill myself though. Even made plans. I cursed God when I woke up each day as I didn't have any idea how to survive. I didn't want to. But as time went on, I got proper treatment. It's natural to think you'll never recover, or never get better, that's what makes mental illness such a b**ch. It paints your eyes black and convinces you it's dark outside.

Have you talked to your doctor about this? It sounds like you could use some help. I'll be honest with you, I tried all holistic methods, and some work very well, but I don't think I would have gotten better without a spell on medication. Some anxiety is so severe that is needs to be stopped, so the black paint can be washed away, and you can get a break and see clearer. My therapist told me that holistic methods do produce good results, but try practicing breathing method's on a rollercoaster. It's practically impossible. Maybe you need a little help in getting off that rollercoaster for a short while?

All the best, I'm always around. PM me if you want to talk, it's not that people don't want to talk, sometimes they just don't always know what to say.

[leighs]

Hi lingling. I'm sorry to hear what a rough time you're going through and I truly hope it gets better for you soon. Have you spoken to a doctor or therapist yet? I have been doing CBT for about 3 months now and I really do believe in it. Keep your head up. I know this sucks, but I also know you'll get past it. We all will or have :)

[lingling]

Yeah, therapists ask the same questions.. they seriously don't even help.
I've tried the holisitic method and it doesn't really do anything, its just like supplements that you take and it doesn't do that much.

[leighs]

I hate to bring it up again but CBT might work for you. Give it a try :)