Increasing anxiety over bad neighbors...

[volacious]

I have long suffered from anxiety and depression, it is only the past year that I feel I am gaining control of my life again. But recently, my experience with the neighbors around my house is reviving a lot of my anxiety...

I live in a mostly quiet suburb, but we have a house behind us that is full of unsupervised & uncontrollable teenagers who yell, scream, party, get drunk, etc etc - anything you might describe as "disturbing the peace." This happens every year during the summer, but for whatever reason they decided to amp it up; every single night like clockwork, midnight to sometimes 4 in the morning. The usual complaining about bad neighbors aside, I am becoming increasingly unable to tolerate it, anxiety-wise... my anxiety has increased every night, and now I am almost reduced to tears as the clock approaches midnight. I thought I could push it out of my head, but the noise and partying makes me so scared... I constantly think they're looking in the windows at me or laughing at me (some thought cycles that are associated with my depression). I can hear them now, and it has come to the point where I am getting panic attacks...

Needless to say, other neighbors have called the police on them, written letters of complaint, explored every avenue to deal with these people. Nothing has been done, and I don't expect anything to be done in the future, so I guess that might be attributing to my unbelievable hopeless feelings about it and feeling so scared of it every night.

My home is the only place I can live comfortably without anxiety, and now I feel like there's an overwhelming intrusion on my only sanctuary. I came to this forum hoping to get some help or advice on what to do... not really asking for community/police action but how I can deal with this, emotionally.

[ReneeA]

I'm really sorry to hear that. It's sad that the police in your area - let alone the parents! - aren't doing anything to help. You're right - home is supposed to be a safe place where you can feel free from all the outside stress.

Do you know if there's some kind of noise ordinance in your neighborhood? Where I live people get a citation for excessive noise after 10pm. Plus, depending on how close the houses are, you can be cited for excessive noise at any time of the day. It happened to a friend of mine who was listening to music in his driveway. He got in trouble because his house is within 50 ft of the neighbor's. And even though it was the middle of the afternoon, if it bothers someone they consider it excessive.

Maybe if there is a rule like that in your area & you brought that to the police's attention, or even at a community meeting of some kind, someone would be more willing to help. Unfortunately, my experience has been that people don't generally offer helpful information in situations like this. They shrug it off because they expect that most people won't push it.

I hope that helps a little!

[volacious]

Thanks Renee, I'm sorry I took a long time to see this. I bought a huge fan for my room to drown out the noise, and that helped. But I think I'll take your advice next year, I can't stand any more of this. I'm so glad for your advice. Thanks. :)

[Brad72]

I can get terribly irrated my noise at night and can hear music a few km's away. My wife just tunes out and goes off to sleep, no problem.

My psych recommended that I should just put in some earplugs. Many people do it and at least you can get a good nights sleep. A white noise generator was also recomemended. I also find that concentrating on the trickling water from my fish tank can also be excellent. I just focus on that and drift off to sleep.

If you do a seach of "Pennsylvania noise ordinance" you can find some very good information of what can be done. They can even be sued in a small claims court if nothing happens. You don't need a lawyer and it doen't cost much. If you and your neighbours all pool in it should be easy. It's amazing how quickly the music will be turned down if they are ordered to pay damages by the courts. Drastic, but might be required in this situation.

[Taylor]

I know you how you feel. I hate when my sanctuary so to speak is bombarded by noise...it loses its sanctuary-ness after that!

Ear plugs could be good, those are cheap. Bose makes some noise-cancelling/insulating headphones that might be nice if you want to spend the money--there are other brands cheaper though. You could also buy a white noise machine or software that could help--I've never tried sound cancellation but who knows.