Death anxiety getting too much....

[nimbleox]

I understand that everyone fears death in some way or form, but how do you keep it from consuming your EVERY living second?

As soon as I wake up my first thought is " One day I wont be here "

I cant sleep for thinking it, I wake up during night in a panic attack about how I will be dead one day, and that I can die any minute.

I've suffered with anxiety afew years now, but feared death for aslong as I remember, but over the last month its every second I am thinking about what will happen when we die, if there is anything, or if we just end....

It could be the fact I have alot of free time on my hands at the moment, but even when I am doing something E.G with friends/BF/Family the thoughts will randomly pop in my head and I think one day you will be dead too... and as soon as I leave them I get consumed with dread again... to the point of shaking and panicking.


How can you fill your life with something thats worthwhile / fun when one day it wont even matter or be remembered by yourself?


I am only 22... And with anxiety symptoms ( I have alot of physical symptoms ) I feel like I am going to die soon or at a young age?

and if I google anymore I will go insane completely!

What can I do ? :(

Nim

[chadders]

Hi I cant really offer any advice because I am in exactly the place that you are, I read through your post and it just describes exactly what I am going through at the moment. I have been talking to my friend who said that it might be an idea to go talk to the doctor and be put on an anti-anxiety or anti-depressant, but I am really worried about going on them because I am not sure how they could help. The other issue I have is that people keep advising CBT and stuff but I dont understand how these things can help, I understand them helping with problems such as social anxiety and things like this but I am not sure how they can help with issues like ours (and its not due to a lack of education on the topic of CBT as I am in my second year of my psychology degree).
I am only 19 and I know exactly how you feel and how much is can just take over your life.
Sorry I wasnt any help but thought it might be useful for you to know that I know exactly how you feel, and will be keeping my eye out because I will find any information people give to you very helpful also.
Lucy

[nimbleox]

Yea I dont understand how CBT can help either, because you cant escape death, everything else can be overcome some way... just this !

I've been on different types of meds in the past, they've worked for my physical symptoms, but I have never been this way about death, so I cant see how they will help my thoughts, only hope is to talk to doctor, but they always seem so condescending.

[acasey]

your not alone with this one! this is one of the most common fears with anxiety. i recommend anxietycentre.com. it cost $9 to join, but worth every penny. i think it will help a ton. good luck!

[acasey]

another thing, please stop googling! this is only gonna make things worse. anyone can put whatever they want on google, it's not reliable!

[chadders]

Yer I have always been a worrier and always worried about death and just about everything else but it has only been been the last year or so that the anxiety has really got so bad its affected me constantly, and again only the past couple of months that I have got this way about death. But I havent been on any medications for anxiety in the past so I am really worried about going on them but I really just need this to stop. Have you found that medications do actually help? Because I know alot of people say they stop the physical symptoms which would really be great, but I was just wondering if they actually do help to stop you constantly thinking things like this?

[Gladys]

I think the point of CBT as a therapy, is that it broaches the subject of behaviour and how the fear impacts on someones life. I think it does that, in the knowledge that all our fears bring the same symptoms of panic. For you, the fear is of death, for me, the fear is of life and living it. We are all afraid of our fear, and that fear of fear causes anxiety attacks.
I'm not a medical professional, but I think the outcome of CBT therapy would be to control the behaviour and so control the fearful episodes and our responses to them. I think the assumption would be that if anxiety symptoms were controlled, and our fear were lessened, the reason for the fear would become non - existant.

If CBT works in that way, and is effective, I think we all need to realise that we will always have that niggling fear of death at the back of our minds to some degree. That's because we are human. Although I don't fear death, as a reason for my anxiety, I fear the unknown and what is beyond my control. However, that fear doesn't impact on my daily life. I have other fears and CBT is a treatment I'm having at the moment.

We all look for therapies and medications to ease our fear, when the answer to our issues lies with us. Often we'll have a focus, other than ourselves, and the fear will subside. It'll come back when we're alone with ourselves, but the fact is we know we have a coping strategy.

Sometimes we take medication to help us, and it's unavoidable. I can't say that my medication controls my panic, but I'm at least able to sleep, which is something I found impossible without medication. However, there's a theory that medication zones you out of something you have to cope with sooner or later.

I can see the positives in all of our fears, if they could be controlled. For you, who fear death, I wish I could love life that much. I wish I could have people around me who I loved and respected and never wanted to lose. For the positives of my fears, I have to look a bit harder. My CBT therapist has asked me what my goals in life are, and I suppose they are the positives to improve my life.

[nimbleox]

I have been on them when I thought I was dying from symptoms... and it worked but.. I have never been on them when I have been this bad with thinking about death to know, I would suggest though you see your doctor and get some, they may work for you =)

[chadders]

I know I do need to start seeing the positives of it all, in that I do have a bf who I love more then anything and I am really close to my family and I think part of my issue currently is that I was so happy with my life. But I have just grown to hate it, and not really see the point in it, not to a suicidal point I dont want to die at all, but Ive started regretting meeting my bf and stuff because I am so terrified of having to lose him one day and stuff, and it does all sound pathetic but its just taken over everything.
But yer I am going to see the dr in the morning now but I am quite terrified about going and looking like an idiot and I dont really know what to say and stuff, or them not being able to give me anything. Being a psychologist in the training I should really believe in the psychological aspects of getting better, but I really would just like to get this part of my life over now.
I am very sorry for taking over your post tho nim, but I was about to write pretty much exactly what you had written. So I hope you get some help aswell :)

[nimbleox]

:D Dont worry about taking over, take comfort slightly in seeing others feeling the same, I am worried about losing my boyfriend to, but more towards not being with him for eternity which is what I want, I feel that my life isnt going to be long enough to be with him.

Hope all goes well with your doctor! Be sure to come back with what s/he suggested =)

[chadders]

Hey just thought I would come back and let you know what they said. They want me to start getting some counselling because they think that'll be most helpful, and ive been put on the waiting list so its going to be a good 3/4 months before I even get to see someone, and by then I will no longer be living in the area so going to have to try and sort something out. But for now they have put me on 40mg Propranolol Hydrochloride tablets, because my anxiety has caused me to have really high blood pressure which this should help with and it also helps with anxiety. So going to start on them and see how it goes from here really. Studying Psychology at University atm (because I am living in the UK) so probably better off waiting till I get back there in September and getting help from someone in my department. Who knows and goodluck!

[nimbleox]

Good luck chadders, I've yet to see a GP about this yet, dont see how anyone can make it go away since death will happen no matter what ! :(