can't handle feeling like this anymore :(

[whataday]

Hi everyone, I am new to this forum, have been dealing with stress and anxiety for as long as I can remember but this past month and a half it has been out of control. Due to a few circumstances, such as my grandfather passing away, my dad getting laid of from his job, my boyfriend (who I lived with up until a month and a half ago) moving 12 hours away to a different country for school and myself quitting my job and moving back home just so I don't feel so damn alone without my boyfriend there. Everything just kind of happened at once so now I am sitting am home alone every day, looking for jobs and school programs, trying to figure out my life but just completely stressing myself out to the point where I can't sleep or eat or do much of anything. This past week I have been able to fall asleep okay (at like 3am) but I wake up at 4:30 or 5am all panicky and cant fall back asleep after that. I also feel nauseous all the time, throw up most mornings (no food, just bile like stuff) and every day I don't know what to do with myself, I try to eat and exercise and do stuff but only because I know it will help. I just feel like I am just passing the time and wasting every day and even if one of the jobs I applied for does call, I don't feel like I can mentally or physically do it right now :(
I just don't feel like myself at all anymore - 2 months ago I was so happy, the happiest I had been in my life, living and working with my boyfriend, so happy and carefree but I feel like everything kind of came crashing down around me and I don't see how I can fix it. Please help and thanks for reading

[Irishlass]

HI there. Sorry to hear of your troubles. Have you talked to your gp about how you are feelin? The bein sick and not sleeping defo sound like you have an anxiety issue. I felt the same a few years ago and after numerous physical tests the doctor diagnosed me wit an anxiety problem and prescribed me tablets. After a couple of months I felt normal again. That was 6 years ago and I've been off the tablets for 3 years but last week I started havin the same panicky feelings and I felt shaky and like I was goin out of my mind as I thought I was in danger when out and about. It is a terrible feeling. I was at doctor today and they have prescribed me the tablets again which I know will help wit time. I hate bein off work but am not fit for it. I really think you should talk to your gp as they Will know how to help you. I Wish you all the best and hope things improve soon for you

[whataday]

Hi, thanks for your reply. I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling like that again :( I also had feelings like this just over 6 years ago now when I started university and felt a lot of pressure and self-induced stress and it just went away with time. I hadn't really had strong anxiety like this again since. It really seems to come when I experience change, I am not good at dealing with it. Was there anything that happened last week that you think may have triggered your anxiety again?
PS I too hate being off work and stuff because it just gives me more time to sit around and think about what is wrong :( I need to keep busy

[Zuena]

Hi there,

I am sorry that you are going through this.

I too find that my anxiety disappears but when I go through a major change, it's like the world has turned upside down.

In September last year I moved 3 times, my divorce became final and I started a new job - and anxiety wise I completely lost it. It is all about us feeling threatened, our safe space no longer being there and we don't know how to create another one or make it right again.

In time this will go away, as you settle down.. BUT.. don't dwell on it. Try and keep busy, reassure yourself and think positively all the time. Tell yourself out loud that you are safe and that there is nothing to worry about. The most important thing is positive thoughts and actions. You are not wasting time, you are looking for work and soon enough you will find something - then you will settle down and the anxiety will disappear.

I hope you feel better soon.

Z

[whataday]

Zuena -

Thank you so much for your reply. I really liked and appreciate everything that you said and I actually believe it too :)
I hope you are doing alright yourself.

[Handsolo]

hiya, I know how you feel even if my situation isn't completly the same. my mum and her long term boyfriend are splitting up and its his house so me and my mum have gotta move out soon and this stresses me out and also my girlfriend lives 5 hours away and i see her every weekend and things seem better then but soon as i have to leave her i get all love sick and then my anxiety gets all worse again and becomes almost unmanageable, I'm on flueoxetine which is basically prozac and i've brought loads of self help books i see a councillor once a week and have been referred to possibly see a psychiatrist as i've been suffering like this for the past three months but i know exactly how you feel in the sense of one minute feeling fine and then the next everythings falling appart. This happened to me and i feel really impatient in wanting to get better, i thought three months later i'd be fine but unfortunatly i'm not and i just wish there was some sort of magic wand that i could use to make myself better

[kbrehm]

hi there...this is my first time posting...i too have horrible anxiety. for a long time i fought it...and for the past 6 mo i have been letting it happen. i get scared that it will never go away. i have been like this now for 2 years. after the birth of my first daughter...since then i've had another child too. i've done EVERYTHING! supplements, books, spiritual healing, therapy, medication, you name it! the one thing i find that works well for me is riding out my feelings each time, and not hooking a thought onto them. all emotions are energy and want to move right through us, if we let them then they fade away. it's been working for me but man does it SUCK--some anxieties stay for DAYS. i have mental health problems on my dad's side so every time i think "i'm just like them, this is it, i'm going nuts"... every anxiety attack i feel needy, paranoid and i just need some love. then after it comes and the adrenaline rush hits, i feel like i've been hit by a truck. i'm tired, flat and loveless. then it happens all over again!