Evilbob333
07-10-2010, 04:41 AM
Hello everybody...its been sometime since i posted (or even visited this site).
I relied heavily on this forum in the past and wanted to post a message to say thanks for the support, as well as to give everyone here who is still struggling a bit of hope for the future.
I'd always been slightly anxious and had periods of severe anxiety from being about 20 (I am now 27). Two summers ago, my anxiety really got a grip on me and I lost my fiancee, my independence and at the time I feared I'd lost my mind. I was diagnosed with OCD, was experiencing chronic derealisation, got to the point where i had to move back to my mums, was off work for two months...etc...It was sheer hell, and those who have never experienced cannot imagine the suffering.
Anyway, long story short...I got better - I am working effectively, am living independently and am getting married in two months to my wonderful Fiancee (a different one!). I was afraid everyday for months, but with the help of my family I faced up each morning to the prospect of another gruelling day. There were tears and panic almost everyday, but on I went...and after a short while things got easier as I got more confident.
I was lucky...I have a good support network. My mum was amazing. My work paid for me to see a CBT therapist, which was invaluable. I know most people out there will not have this luxury, but if its at all possible pay for CBT...its an investment in your future...live off beans whilst you pay for therapy, you will not regret it. At the very least try and get a CBT self help book.
What I'm trying to say is that there is a way through this, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. It is not easy, it will be very tough but it is attainable. You owe it to yourself to try. I decided that I was in a war with my fear...Me Vs Fear...the cost of losing was my life...I developed a fighting attitude...I talked to my fear like i would to a rival...I got angry with it and told it repeatedly that it would not beat me...i went to war and came back bloody, bruised and victorious!
My best tips for wellness...Sleep (get a meditation tape to fall asleep to...Paul McKenna does good ones), drink milk often (especially before bed)...exercise where possible...eat little and often (bananas are my best friend)...try a good quality vit B complex to soothe your frazzled nerves...write out what you're thinking and try to rationalise...BE BRAVE IN SPITE OF YOUR FEAR- only you can dig yourself from this hole.
I have been back on the rails for two years now...This is something that will be with me for life in some form...it will flare up in hard times and I will have to work hard to maintain my good form...but every mountain is followed by a freewheel downhill! Life can be good again.
I hope that this message brings a glimmer of hope to at least one of you...I want you to benefit from this forum like I did, I want you to be well.
And I want to say thankyou to all the users and creators of this forum who spoke to me and helped me in hard (read hellish) times. My life is so much more now thanks to you all.
Cheers
PS Remember You do not know how strong you are until you have no choice but to be as strong as you can be.
I relied heavily on this forum in the past and wanted to post a message to say thanks for the support, as well as to give everyone here who is still struggling a bit of hope for the future.
I'd always been slightly anxious and had periods of severe anxiety from being about 20 (I am now 27). Two summers ago, my anxiety really got a grip on me and I lost my fiancee, my independence and at the time I feared I'd lost my mind. I was diagnosed with OCD, was experiencing chronic derealisation, got to the point where i had to move back to my mums, was off work for two months...etc...It was sheer hell, and those who have never experienced cannot imagine the suffering.
Anyway, long story short...I got better - I am working effectively, am living independently and am getting married in two months to my wonderful Fiancee (a different one!). I was afraid everyday for months, but with the help of my family I faced up each morning to the prospect of another gruelling day. There were tears and panic almost everyday, but on I went...and after a short while things got easier as I got more confident.
I was lucky...I have a good support network. My mum was amazing. My work paid for me to see a CBT therapist, which was invaluable. I know most people out there will not have this luxury, but if its at all possible pay for CBT...its an investment in your future...live off beans whilst you pay for therapy, you will not regret it. At the very least try and get a CBT self help book.
What I'm trying to say is that there is a way through this, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. It is not easy, it will be very tough but it is attainable. You owe it to yourself to try. I decided that I was in a war with my fear...Me Vs Fear...the cost of losing was my life...I developed a fighting attitude...I talked to my fear like i would to a rival...I got angry with it and told it repeatedly that it would not beat me...i went to war and came back bloody, bruised and victorious!
My best tips for wellness...Sleep (get a meditation tape to fall asleep to...Paul McKenna does good ones), drink milk often (especially before bed)...exercise where possible...eat little and often (bananas are my best friend)...try a good quality vit B complex to soothe your frazzled nerves...write out what you're thinking and try to rationalise...BE BRAVE IN SPITE OF YOUR FEAR- only you can dig yourself from this hole.
I have been back on the rails for two years now...This is something that will be with me for life in some form...it will flare up in hard times and I will have to work hard to maintain my good form...but every mountain is followed by a freewheel downhill! Life can be good again.
I hope that this message brings a glimmer of hope to at least one of you...I want you to benefit from this forum like I did, I want you to be well.
And I want to say thankyou to all the users and creators of this forum who spoke to me and helped me in hard (read hellish) times. My life is so much more now thanks to you all.
Cheers
PS Remember You do not know how strong you are until you have no choice but to be as strong as you can be.