This is me

[Tracy]

Hello everyone, I am a 33 year female who lived with a family who all suffer from mental illness. I am trying to deal with what I saw and learned and my doctor thinks I suffer from post tramatic stress disorder. I know he is right. I thought I was dealing with things just fine until about 6 days ago. I have had this feeling of a lump in the back of my throat that won't go away. I've done the doctor thing, they all say acid reflux and stress. I've been told "stop thinking about it and it will go away" I do and it doesn't go away... or maybe I do think about it and don't realize it. I am nervous by nature, I loose friends over it. Women don't like me, and the one man who understands, married me (I am lucky he's around). I have no family (they are in their own worlds). I am in the process of having a new doctor who barely knows me, I don't like my current job but need it.
I've been off work the past two days because of this lump, it feels like a hicup is stuck there but nothing ever comes out. I am currently taking pantaoloc (which is for acid reflux & ulcer).
I don't know where to turn and to be honest, I am a bit scared.

I am not depressed but I am always nervous that people are talking badly about me. I am always so worried that other people don't like me.

I've never felt this way until about a year or two ago.

Can anyone relate? :oops: :oops:

[soshy]

Hi Tracy, and welcome to the Forum. Yes, I can relate very much to what you are going through especially regarding family. My family is of no support because of a history of mental illness and they are also "in their own worlds" and their help is like rubbing salt into a wound. I also have ptsd.

I'm sorry to hear you're having a hard time of things :( . The lump in your throat probably is do to anxiety. It's easy to say, "Don't think about it," but people who have anxiety have a very hard time "not thinking" and we tend to analyze or over analyze things until we learn how not to do so.

I've had lumps in the back of my throat before and it was do to anxiety and they do go away. I have a history of ulcers due to worrying.

Have you seen anyone besides a general practioner, like a therapist? I've found therapy to be very helpful.

You can overcome anxiety and the road to recovery is getting help which you are already doing by joining the forum :) !

Come back soon and let us know how it went with the new doctor.

Take care - soshy