Ponder
11-09-2021, 01:42 AM
I'm writing this one up as a concerned forum user proposing a couple of methods on - How to Deal With Difficult People.
Do Not Respond - Say Nothing At All:
1stly, I propose not responding to forum users that seek to demean, attack, put down, encroach, & or shame other forum members. More so, not responding to posts, that do more to drag the forum down, than offer any real sense of release for those forum members whom are having difficulty regulating their emotion. This proposal, coming from an individual that often struggles with such things himself. It's one thing to advocate saying whatever, but then another to have such tolerance abused by those whom only ever offer up conflict and despair. It's one thing to Vent & Commiserate, but another when you have nothing else to give.
Make a Post About Something Positive:
Whilst ignoring negative and destructive posts, it may be helpful to post more about positive things. Even when there is not much positive things going on, it can help to talk about the positive things you would like to see in yours's and others lives. Attention seekers generally burn out pretty quick once they realise no-one is going to feed their antics. Making posts as if these difficult people are not there can really trigger them, but more so in a good way as is a means to quicken the end result (OP/Burnout) rather then allow such antics to ruin an otherwise well known space for those few of us that have taken the time and effort to call this place home.
Acknowledge the 'Negative Impact' that Difficulty People are Having on your Personal Space within The Forum:
This is something that has taken place recently. Simply commenting about feeling that this space in no longer feeling like home, that you don't know if you can stay any more or you don't know how much longer you can stay because of too much negativity in the forum is a great way to indicate to others that something is not right within the forum and that it is impacting you in a negative way. Making such acknowledgements is not easy as to do so may have one considering the telling of such may in fact, feed said negative and destructive posts. I propose it is best to say how such difficult people are impacting you if that is that case. I am glad this was recently done. I also chimed in, in my own way being careful not to feed it ... as much as I wanted to. I did not and glad for it. Instead I am writing this.
__________________________________
Again, this all coming from an individual that often struggle to self regulate and a history of many mistakes. That said, I bid on helping others, moving forward and ensuring we all have a safe place that we can call home.
Although I did not create this online space, have zero authority whatsoever and care less for it, I do feel as a long time member somewhat ashamed for the recent goings on in this forum and apologize for it. I give it no more attention other than that quick acknowledgement and encourage all members old and new alike to please use the ignore feature if things are to continue and or more importantly please do post as you personally feel. Whilst this forum is public, it is nice to connect on a personal level. As such, despite only being a very small forum with little activity, you can be assured that connections you make are very real.
Once more - apologies for the recent unrelenting negative outbursts. It is actually not something we have had to deal with for quite some time.
Thanks for your time and thanks for being here - I hope some of you continue to stay.
Do Not Respond - Say Nothing At All:
1stly, I propose not responding to forum users that seek to demean, attack, put down, encroach, & or shame other forum members. More so, not responding to posts, that do more to drag the forum down, than offer any real sense of release for those forum members whom are having difficulty regulating their emotion. This proposal, coming from an individual that often struggles with such things himself. It's one thing to advocate saying whatever, but then another to have such tolerance abused by those whom only ever offer up conflict and despair. It's one thing to Vent & Commiserate, but another when you have nothing else to give.
Make a Post About Something Positive:
Whilst ignoring negative and destructive posts, it may be helpful to post more about positive things. Even when there is not much positive things going on, it can help to talk about the positive things you would like to see in yours's and others lives. Attention seekers generally burn out pretty quick once they realise no-one is going to feed their antics. Making posts as if these difficult people are not there can really trigger them, but more so in a good way as is a means to quicken the end result (OP/Burnout) rather then allow such antics to ruin an otherwise well known space for those few of us that have taken the time and effort to call this place home.
Acknowledge the 'Negative Impact' that Difficulty People are Having on your Personal Space within The Forum:
This is something that has taken place recently. Simply commenting about feeling that this space in no longer feeling like home, that you don't know if you can stay any more or you don't know how much longer you can stay because of too much negativity in the forum is a great way to indicate to others that something is not right within the forum and that it is impacting you in a negative way. Making such acknowledgements is not easy as to do so may have one considering the telling of such may in fact, feed said negative and destructive posts. I propose it is best to say how such difficult people are impacting you if that is that case. I am glad this was recently done. I also chimed in, in my own way being careful not to feed it ... as much as I wanted to. I did not and glad for it. Instead I am writing this.
__________________________________
Again, this all coming from an individual that often struggle to self regulate and a history of many mistakes. That said, I bid on helping others, moving forward and ensuring we all have a safe place that we can call home.
Although I did not create this online space, have zero authority whatsoever and care less for it, I do feel as a long time member somewhat ashamed for the recent goings on in this forum and apologize for it. I give it no more attention other than that quick acknowledgement and encourage all members old and new alike to please use the ignore feature if things are to continue and or more importantly please do post as you personally feel. Whilst this forum is public, it is nice to connect on a personal level. As such, despite only being a very small forum with little activity, you can be assured that connections you make are very real.
Once more - apologies for the recent unrelenting negative outbursts. It is actually not something we have had to deal with for quite some time.
Thanks for your time and thanks for being here - I hope some of you continue to stay.