I don't feel like myself anymore... (Help!)

[jen1017]

I've been having panic/anxiety problems for the passed few weeks, and now I'm starting to feel odd.

I don't feel like myself at all anymore. I look in the mirror and I know it's me, but it doesn't seem like me. And my life seems odd too, like I don't belong to it, though I know I do. Everything just seems a little off.

Also, I've felt very emotionally numb since I've had my attacks. I don't feel happy/sad, or excited or anything. I don't look forward to anything. I'm never hungry and I don't enjoy food like I used to.

I find that all I am doing is sitting and thinking about my condition and how I feel and it feels like I'm going crazy. Like I can't turn my thoughts off. I'm always thinking about weird things like I'm just a thought inside of a body, and odd things like that.

And I keep thinking that I'll never get better because I'm always going to be thinking these things.

Has anyone else felt this way, or had these thoughts??

I'm beginning to give up hope for myself.

[irrational]

I'm in the exact same boat. My irrational fears are completely taking over my life. I don't want to do anything that I enjoy. All I do is sit and run through all the various worst case scenarios running through my head trying to see how I'd handle each one (and not well).

I am completely not myself and that just upsets me more.

Last time this happened, medication helped a lot. I have a feeling this is the road I'm going down again..

[Evilbob333]

Hi Jen...i know you're struggling at the moment...and i've only very recently been in the exact same place as you sound like you are now. The only advice i can give you is that you are fine...this is just an anxiety and just another 'what if' thought. It is horrible feeling like you are at present...its the scariest thing i've ever felt like, questioning reality is a scary deal.
Do your best to stay engaged with people, mix with them, talk to them, interact. I was talking to my therapist this morning and she said that the very fact that you're querying this feeling shows a large amount of self awareness which indicates that you're definitely not losing your grip on reality.
You need to learn not to engage with these thoughts, as its just a thought that generates a feeling. Everyone feels detached from time to time, not with it. You need to try and learn to accept that the thought is there but engage with it no further, let it drift away. ts a very difficult technique but it will help immensely.
I strongly recommend you look into CBT as a way of dealing with these intrusive thoughts.
Remember you ARE not alone...this is normal and will pass.

[jen1017]

Thank you for replying. I feel like such a pest posting here all the time, but I just don't know what else to do.

Thank you again, you're replies help ease my mind at least a bit!

[jakleb]

Hi Jen
I agree 100% with bob what you describe is exactly how I felt 6 months ago. Went of my food, lost interest in everything I used to enjoy, felt like I could never be happy again and that I was without hope. I also had the terrible thoughts about not being real and questioning reality, I know it is scary, but like bob says you need to just let them go do not try and stop them from coming into your mind because that only makes them come in more, try to accept that they are there and just let them pass, remember this, you have absolutely no control over anything externally, so if something really bad is going to happen well you can do nothing about it anyway so why worry.

I know it's easier said than done (I have been there) but it works and eventually you will feel like yourself again and you will start enjoying all the things you once did. I remember constantly thinking about my condition too and it was cracking me up, so I remember thinking that I had to just start living my life again, it's hard cause once you start to get on with things all of a sudden you remember again and it scares you, but after awhile the time between forgetting and remembering gets longer until you spend most of the day getting on with enjoying life and only moments remembering you suffer from anxiety. Also when you start to get better you will appreciate things a little more, family, friends, life in general. also remember it is good to talk about how you feel especially to those who have been where you are. Hope this helps

ps: I am not allowed to post links but use ur imagination and go to the address below..... all the best
:D
panic-and-anxiety-attacks dot com

[jen1017]

Thank you very much! I'm actually starting to feel a bit better.

I went out the other day and tried to worry less. I'm just keeping myself occupied and it seems to be cutting back on the anxiousness. :)

[jakleb]

Great, good to hear you r feeling better. keep going there is so much to enjoy in life, remember to keep foucasing on the fact ur getting better, i always said to myself " i am getting better" and if i had a bad day or just a day when i felt abit anxious again i said "tomorrow is a new day". remember even if you are 3 steps forward and 1 back you are still moving forward.

All the best for the future and if ya need any advise or just someone to chat with there always plenty of people on this forum to help........ keep fighting :tongue: