varjakbaby
11-27-2016, 12:04 PM
I broke up with my best friend about a month ago and now I have no one to talk to. Just being able to send those interesting thoughts via text to another soul to be heard. There's something so gratifying in that. Sure, his response time was getting a bit slow, but it was still something.
We broke up because he got angry at me for posting something inappropriate on his facebook. And I told him I needed "some time to figure things out", which was like a half-lie. I haven't figured anything out. I'm still anxious and miserable as hell. And now I have one less friend to talk to. So that's down to zero. So all my thoughts are just bottled up and have no venue. They die, as I do, in silence.
I know, I've tried journaling. But it seems dead. Like a brick wall. No one will ever hear your words. The human mind is an intricate labyrinth and having one there for you, always, to process your information is just exponentially better than... just writing things down.
I don't want to go back to him and apologize or anything because I am too stubborn, and he said, "hopefully I see you again down the road," which makes me think he's expecting this to be a long duration of silence. I don't want to break tradition. I don't want to defy the odds. Maybe this is my punishment. Maybe I needed a time out. Who knows. All I know is it sucks and I miss it.
We met in high school and it was a pretty good senior year. He has a good sense of humor, real quirky, almost witty but a little weird. Really cool.
/sudden ending
We broke up because he got angry at me for posting something inappropriate on his facebook. And I told him I needed "some time to figure things out", which was like a half-lie. I haven't figured anything out. I'm still anxious and miserable as hell. And now I have one less friend to talk to. So that's down to zero. So all my thoughts are just bottled up and have no venue. They die, as I do, in silence.
I know, I've tried journaling. But it seems dead. Like a brick wall. No one will ever hear your words. The human mind is an intricate labyrinth and having one there for you, always, to process your information is just exponentially better than... just writing things down.
I don't want to go back to him and apologize or anything because I am too stubborn, and he said, "hopefully I see you again down the road," which makes me think he's expecting this to be a long duration of silence. I don't want to break tradition. I don't want to defy the odds. Maybe this is my punishment. Maybe I needed a time out. Who knows. All I know is it sucks and I miss it.
We met in high school and it was a pretty good senior year. He has a good sense of humor, real quirky, almost witty but a little weird. Really cool.
/sudden ending