PLEASE Help!! Need reassurance and tips ASAP. Thanks!!

[Calista]

I am new to this forum so I am not sure if this is how everyone corresponds on here.

I have been in college since I was 18, mostly due to my mom wanting me to go and I didn't want to disappoint her. I am now 24 and haven't received my bacheolor's yet because I keep dropping classes I need. I am so nervous all the time to be around people. My anxiety has made me very depressed and I can't concentrate on anything anymore. I don't have any friends and I hardly talk to anyone.

This semester I have withdrawn from 3 classes and added two classes to just keep it so financial aid won't charge me the money. I really feel like I won't be able to finish because I am so anxiety ridden all the time. I am embarrassed because my family is always like "you are a lifetime student". I have a 3.0 GPA which isn't the best but it's decent for a science major. I am sorry for freaking out on here. I just have no one to talk to.

Would it be possible to stop going for a while and re-enroll? I just feel like since I have so many loans and have gone for so many years that I have failed completely. Ugh. I'm in full panic mode and can't calm down. No one around me understands. :(

[Kirk]

Welcome to the forum. First of all, you are not a failure. Our daughter just turned 26 and finally got a job after getting a 4 year degree and then deciding it was not for her.
She bounced around a bit and finally landed a job in the healthcare field that pays well. I would talk to a therapist and medicine may be the way to go at least temporarily.

[Calista]

Thank you for writing back! I appreciate hearing those words because I have been really hard on myself. I haven't felt like "me" for a long while now because my anxiety is controlling my life at this point. I think it would probably be a good idea to find a therapist...I hope I will be able to open up to them! Thanks again!

[gypsylee]

Hi Calista and welcome :)

I did a Bachelor's degree in Business (Marketing) to make my parents happy and wish I'd done something that made ME happy. It ended up being useless anyway because my anxiety was through the roof (and so was my drinking). Seriously, if I could do it all again I would have done Arts or something creative that suited me. I've got a 15yo daughter and I've told her I think she should travel once she finishes high school. She's lucky in that money isn't a big issue but I really just want her to learn about herself and get some "life experience" before making any big decisions about a career.

Anyway do talk to someone about your anxiety and I hope you find this forum helpful.

All the best,
Gypsy x

[Anne1221]

I second Kirk's idea that some therapy/counseling would help.

[Teafrenzy]

yes, for 30 days do the following:

1st avoid Caffeine, alcohol and sweets. This might be really hard for you being in school, avoiding alcohol as there is great temptation to drink. But these are three biggest contributors in your diet for anxiety.

2nd exercise regularly. Join a gym. Most colleges have free or discounted memberships for students. Try to do 45 minutes of exercise, each day and every day. Don't be discouraged if you feel anxiety immediately after exercising. Give your body a chance to adjust.

3rd use supplements - magnesium is a must! read about the supplements at the top of the general discussion page. I find Passion flower extract is very powerful. Try some. If money is short, just stick to magnesium supplements.

4th - don't fight with your anxiety. Let it push you around and ride the waves. The more you fight against it, the harder it will push back. Pretend you are swimming in the ocean and a big wave comes along. Don't push against it. Ride it out. Accept it. When you get anxious thoughts like "oh I'm going to fail this exam", just accept it with a "so what" attitude. "So what - If I fail, I can always take the course again".

5) Be sociable. Take baby steps. Buy something in a store and say hello to the person behind the counter. They have no choice but to be nice. Then try to say hello to strangers, nobody in your age group. Anyone who looks older than 60 will 99% be very nice to you. Simple things. Small steps as you build confidence.

6) talk it out with the school counsellors. Or ask for money from your parents to see a therapist and talk it out.

Only having tried this for 30 days..reassess. If your anxiety has gone way down. Keep it up. If you still find yourself anxious with no improvement, go the meds route. Just remember that meds are always there if you need them.