Ten Commandments

[raggamuffin]

Hi all,

Here are 10 tips I've learned over the years that I've had anxiety. I think they can really help people who suffer from anxiety, depression and symptoms:



First of all: Nostalgia

Often we look back to the times before anxiety struck us with panic attacks and symptoms as a time of happiness and tranquility. In reality, anxiety is a call for change and it often takes many years of poor stress management and imbalanced emotions to manifest itself physically in the body. I myself thought life was fine prior to having a panic attack, seemingly randomly in my bedroom when I thought, at the time leading up to the attack that I was happy and content.

We should be weary of looking back fondly to the past instead of moving on into the future. For some the transition from normality to anxious living is stark and sudden - such as abuse or a death in the family. For other's it may well be a slow transition as our increasingly negative outlook or slow withdrawal from those around us begins to take hold of our lives.



Second: Acceptance

Many people struggle to see that scary and very real and painful symptoms are manifestations of anxiety. When the mind is stressed the body will follow suit eventually. For me it took years of daily symptoms, virtually every hour of every day wracked with pains here there and everywhere. Perhaps it was long term experience that finally helped me see that the pains and symptoms were indeed caused by stress. I pestered Dr's multiple times a month for years, each time the tests and prognosis came back as "anxiety". But hearing the word anxiety and truly believing it has that much power and control over you is a difficult step to take - but it is truly the first step that needs to be taken to really improve.



Third: Dr Google

For those who's symptoms became a chronic and daily fear about their own health and well being - please refrain from relying on Google. For me, Dr visits became an addictive and compulsive routine whenever a new symptom arose. Google is a lot more convenient than booking a Dr's appointment. However, Google doesn't have 5+ years of medical training behind it. Googling any symptom inevitably will lead to all manner of possible diseases and conditions. The fact of the matter is that anxiety can pretty much conjure any pain imaginable.

Here's an example: For the first time in your life you feel chest pain. Your initial reaction is fear. From fear you start to question yourself. "What if it's my heart?" To comfort your fear, or perhaps try to confirm it's validity you Google "Chest pain". Soon enough you read all sorts of terrifying possibilities for the cause of your pain. It could be a heart attack, a blod clot, a collapsed lung or costochondritis. As you read through the list of "what if's" you feel that terrifying surge of adrenaline. The chest pain might give way to dizziness, hyperventialting or a full blown panic attack. You start to genuinely believe you're deathly ill and the anxiety and symptoms become unbearable. You rush to your phone and ring the Dr or go down to ER to get checked out. The tests come back fine and the Dr says "It's probably anxiety". You go home, possibly feeling foolish, or possibly doubting the Dr's opinion. "Did they do enough tests?" "Perhaps the missed something?" "What if the pain comes back" Once again you retreat into a neverending vicious circle of doubt and fear as the symptoms continue to harass you day in day out.

NOW THEN. Let's try a new example of how to use Google effectively. For the first time in your life you feel chest pain. Your initial reaction is fear. From fear you start to question yourself. "What if it's my heart?"
BUT, this time you Google "ANXIETY CHEST PAIN" and you're taken to forum links of hundreds of people in the same position as you; scared, uncertain and feeling symptoms that are common to THOUSANDS of anxiety sufferers.

Step two spoke of acceptance. Through acceptance comes positive actions to tackle your fears. If you experience chest pain and believe it to be something sinister - you'll continue down that road, with Google, or Dr's or health checks. Even if you've gone to the Dr countless times before, you don't believe them, because deep down you're convinced it's something physically wrong with you. However, if you believe it to be another symptom of anxiety you will look for constructive and positive ways to tackle the symptoms of anxiety.



Fourth: Positivity

Previously we spoke about positive steps to tackle anxiety. Anxiety doesn't respond well to negativity. We all know negative emotions, fear, worry, regret, guilt, anger, sadness and grief. We also know how low they can make us feel. When we feel low, anxiety comes out to play. It often feels like it's kicking us whilst we're down. In reality it feeds off of our negativity. Sure, we can't stay positive all the time, but being negative all the time serves no positive conclusions and certainly won't help us or our anxiety improve.



Fifth: Repetitive Bad Habits

When we're stuck in a rut of depression, repetition or unfulfillment, it's hard to drag ourselves out and start to move forwards in our lives. Sometimes we see the negative patterns repeating themselves and causing our anxiety or depression to get worse, but we feel like we don't have the energy or fight left in us to tackle or change our routines and our lives. Negativity can actually become an addiction. Think how you feel when you're knee deep in a panic attack. How the waves of anxiety and panic destabilize and terrify you. It feels like nothing makes sense, it feels like you can't recall any anxiety attack you've had in the past. Each attack is terrifyingly real and deviously unique so that each time they come you feel utterly unprepared and defeated once it has passed.

But after the attack has truly gone, asides from lingering symptoms and fatigue, some of us may well feel happy, or even excited. The storm has passed and we feel better. Perhaps anxious behaviour becomes an addiction? Similar to drugs or alcohol, we feel that rush of pleasure and fulfillment after the attack, but during the attack - much like a comedown or hangover we feel wretched, broken and incomplete. We may well get stuck in a vicious circle or pleasure and pain.

[raggamuffin]

Sixth: Substances

Whether legal or illegal, drugs and substances alter our brain chemistry. There's no doubt that many people require medication to live and keep their bodies functional. With improvements in medicine, people have increased lifespans. But self medication is often a behaviour practiced by those who struggle with anxiety or depression. We crave the escape and euphoria that substances provide us. We feel liberated from our responsibilities and experience heightened senses and pleasurable experiences from normal and even mundane sitations in life. But the pleasure comes at a cost. Whether monetary, mental or physical - substance abuse comes at a price. To truly come to terms with anxiety and depression we have to face our problems in a sober and clear state of mind.



Seventh: The Blame Game

If you have a panic attack in a shoe store, you may well be terrified to return to that same place in the future. Experiencing a panic attack in public can feel embaressing. New places can provoke uncertainty and anxiety in anyone. But for those already living on edge, it can be enough to push them over. 2 years ago I struggled to go anywhere new. Dizziness would be so strong I felt utterly debilitated by it. The fear and uncertainty it created was unberable. But I told myself to see it through. Even though each time I went somewhere new I felt intense symptoms, I felt pride in myself when I returned back to my "safe" environments. I felt content because I'd rode the storm and got through the other side. I hadn't given into anxiety like I had done so many times in the past - fleeing situations that made me feel scared or anxious. Returning home with a sense of deafeat and embaressment. Negative emotions that only serve to strengthen the hold of our anxious mindset.

We have to expose ourselves to what makes us most anxious. Anxiety is a sign for change. What scares us most needs to be confronted. This is a difficult thing to accept and an even harder notion to put into practice. It's especially difficult because the first few weeks and attempts at facing our anxiety head on will be met with the most resistance. I won't sugar coat it - your anxiety will want to beat you to the floor and make you run away. But you can't let it, because your anxiety is a part of you. Without you your anxiety doesn't exist. The only thing you're challenging when you confront anxiety is yourself.



Eigth: Confidence

Who do you think of when you picture a confident man or woman? How do they look? How do they act? Do they look miserable and downtrodden? Do they sound overwhelmingly negative or dispondent? No, they don't. A confident person will face anxiety themselves. Nobody is immune to their own doubts or fears. But a person who challenges themselves to improve will reap the rewards.

I spoke before of the symptoms and emotions I felt when I first forced myself to go to new places. I wanted to throw in the towel many a time; but I didn't. The more you face your anxiety the less of a hold it has.

It's a strangle battle - you need to challenge your anxiety by facing it head on. But at the same time you can't fight it. You need to allow it to be there. You shouldn't be bargaining with it or pretending it's not there. It has EVERY RIGHT TO EXIST.



Ninth: The Mirror

Following on from the vision of a confident person. How do they make you feel when you're around them? We may well feel inspired, feed off their positivty and energy. Or we may feel envious, agitated or down right annoyed they have to be around you. It all hinges on what you're letting in - positivity or negativity.

As discussed - when you focus on negativity you're not going to feel good in or about yourself. A negative outlook will make your anxiety and depression feel increasingly overwhelming. You shouldn't feel ashamed if a symptom or situation comes along and your first instinctive thought is something negative, or driven by fear. We didn't create an anxiety disorder overnight; it's born through years of doubt, negative outlooks and poor emotional processing. So a negative reaction shouldn't be seen as negative. If you respond to your initial thought with more negativity you're simply overburdening yourself with more unecessary emotional baggage. Instead you should shift your thought process in the opposite direction and look to what is positive.

So what is the mirror I speak of? Simple - it's you, it's the life and world around you. If you feel down, and upset and angry, how will people react to you when you're sending out all this negative energy? Are they going to feel happily and lucky to receive all this negativity? Or are they going to feel uneasy, unhappy or annoyed? Similarly, how do people react to the bubbly, happy and confident person? How do some people light up a room with their presence and add so much positivity and energy to a group or situation?

Let's go one step further, and you may choose to believe this next step or not. If life reflects back to us, what we emit. Then what about the new people and situations we experience in life? If you feel anxious and scared day in day out, what tends to happen? More panic attacks, new symptoms and possible new people you meet and speak to who are struggling with similar expriences.

In the early years when I was experiencing daily symptoms I met so many people in a similar position to me. We felt lost, and yet, we were offered advice by those who had experienced and improved upon themselves. I felt doubt and unease in trusting advice provided by people I couldn't relate to at that moment in time. I felt jealous and unsure of these people who were supposedly feeling better than I was with their anxiety.

Now that things are improving I'm meeting more and more people who have experienced anxiety in the past. People who might still struggle from time to time with their issues and doubts, but on the whole are making positive steps and progress in their lives.



Tenth: Nutrition

The cherry on top, so to speak. Why is there a supplements fad? Because the idea of getting what our body needs instantly and conveniently is appealing to our modern culture. If we can get something instantly, it feels more appealing and rewarding. But the minerals and vitamins in the tablets we take are chemically manufactures and yet naturally occur in food we can eat.

It's no secret that western cultures food is mass produced, pre-packaged and laced with additives and chemicals that can harm the body. Avoiding foods we've been used to for so many years sounds unappealing, expensive and frustrating for many of us.

However, if we don't challenge ourselves, how do we expect to improve? I offer a challenge to anyone here - try 3 weeks of ditching all processed food consumption. No pre-packaged ready meals, oven meals or pre-prepared sandwiches and lunches. Increase your intake of vegetables, legumes, fruit (in moderation) and meat (if you eat it). I can guarantee you will notice improvements in mood, energy and symptoms.

IBS, much like antacids and proton pump inhibitors is over-prescribed and diagnosed. Most people with an anxiety disorder will be no stranger to stomach issues, whether it's butterflies, stomach aches or nausea. The more developed a country is, the more the populations diet will be processed and chemically tainted. IBS is a condition more prevalent in developed countries. Through laziness, convenience and corporate profits, supermarkets are very biased towards long lasting, cheap processed foods.

Do your body and in turn your mind a favour and eat healthily. It needn't be overly expensive or involve tediously long recipes.




So there we have it, my 10 Commandments for anxiety

Ed