Can't turn my mind off

[verity]

Hello to anyone who reads this. I've been struggling for a while now and feel like it's finally time I did something to reach out, to see if there's anyone who I can talk to about what I've been experiencing. I don't feel like I'm actually doing so bad now, but these horrible anxious feelings have started to come and go in waves, and it's really getting frustrating. But let me back up and talk about the whole story first. I think it was around December when I really started feeling "off." I just didn't care about school anymore and I was finding it very difficult to stay motivated. I flew through my first two years of college just wanting to work hard and feeling passionate about everything, but I felt like I was starting to lose that. I thought maybe I was just going through a slump and tried to brush it off, but it started to get worse. I've always been kind of a worrier, but it started to really get away from me. I would feel overwhelmed to the point that I couldn't work on assignments. I had to drop some responsibilities (such as studying for entrance exams) because the thought of how I might perform on them just stressed me out so badly. I've never experienced testing anxiety before. I began to doubt that my friends and my professors truly liked me, and I sort of turned inward to deal with all the stress. When I tried to talk to one of my professors about how I was feeling, he insisted that I was just overthinking everything. And that's the problem! I KNOW I'm overthinking stuff and that I'm making things seem worse than they actually are. Believe me, I know. But I don't know how to fix it. I can identify that I'm overwhelming myself, but emotionally I can't seem to turn it off. I feel this immense pressure to do everything right and to please people, but it's just become so overbearing that I can hardly stand it. I like to think that people will be supportive of me, but I can't help but doubt it. And I don't know who to talk to about this. I feel like if I tell someone about this they're just going to think I'm crazy and being dramatic. And maybe I am. But I don't know. I backed off of some things of was feeling better for a couple of weeks, but the stressy/anxious feelings have started to come back recently and I'm really starting to get sick of it. Does any of this make any sense? Is there any explanation for why I feel like this? Am I just being dramatic? Any advice or just knowing someone else feels like this would be so much appreciated.

[MikeMaverick]

Hey. I feel the same way with my mind. It happened like that after my brother passed away, and my friends betrayed me because of my anxiety condition. If you wanna talk we can. I also nee someone to talk to too...

[gypsylee]

Hi and welcome to both of you :)

Mike - sorry for the loss of your brother - mine went in 2014 as well (accidental drug overdose).

I was talking to someone else about this in a bit of depth in another thread recently.. It's on a post called "Racing Thoughts" on one of the other boards (Agoraphobia maybe?) About how automatic our thoughts actually are and not something we have as much control over as we think. The amount of times I've been told I "think too much".. Well yeah that's about as helpful as people telling me I "need to relax". There is a way to stop thinking so much (known as "mindfulness" by the Buddhists etc) but it's a real skill and takes a lot of practice. Probably the best book I've read on this is The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, but I don't like everything he says eg. He goes on about how it's not something you can learn and how you just do it all of a sudden like magic lol. But I think the first step in this is realising how unconscious most of our thinking is. We're brought up in this culture to think our conscious mind is the be-all-and-end-all but the subconscious has a HUGE impact. Another of my favourite authors on this subject is Carl Jung.

Anyway have a look at that Racing Thoughts post as well if you're interested.

Cheers,
Gypsy x

[MikeMaverick]

Hi and welcome to both of you :)

Mike - sorry for the loss of your brother - mine went in 2014 as well (accidental drug overdose).

I was talking to someone else about this in a bit of depth in another thread recently.. It's on a post called "Racing Thoughts" on one of the other boards (Agoraphobia maybe?) About how automatic our thoughts actually are and not something we have as much control over as we think. The amount of times I've been told I "think too much".. Well yeah that's about as helpful as people telling me I "need to relax". There is a way to stop thinking so much (known as "mindfulness" by the Buddhists etc) but it's a real skill and takes a lot of practice. Probably the best book I've read on this is The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, but I don't like everything he says eg. He goes on about how it's not something you can learn and how you just do it all of a sudden like magic lol. But I think the first step in this is realising how unconscious most of our thinking is. We're brought up in this culture to think our conscious mind is the be-all-and-end-all but the subconscious has a HUGE impact. Another of my favourite authors on this subject is Carl Jung.

Anyway have a look at that Racing Thoughts post as well if you're interested.

Cheers,
Gypsy x

Thanks, Gypsy. I'm mostly afraid to take medications sometimes because of that too. Alot of stuff that scares me.

as for Verity, if you feel like overthinking, is there something you can do to clear your mind? Ever play video games?

[gypsylee]

Oh I like medications ;)

Yes actually, I play those stupid little Facebook games and sometimes I turn the volume off and listen to music. That works quite well and I even get dream flashbacks sometimes, so it's like my brain has gone into a different "mode". Deep breathing is also good but takes practice. Driving (at night when there's not much traffic) and listening to music..

I had to google "verity". Nice word! :) Oh now I realise you were addressing the OP with that. Still, it's a great word..

[Nowuccas]

Hey Verity,

I suggest that you learn, and use the relaxation methods at http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/mindbody/a/Meditation.htm
or www.wikihow.com/Meditate or the Yoga Nidra, (actually a meditative practice; a series of simple mental exercises only; no flexibility required) at http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?34171-Questions-relating-to-troubles-with-meditation&p=224951#post224951 if having diffulty in focusing.

Some people are still dismissive of them, but scientific testing has demonstrated conclusively that they increase activity and may, after regularly practising for a couple of months, result in a thickening of the walls of the prefrontal cortex, and better enable it and the hippocampus to control the amygdala, which is the fear centre of the brain, where anxiety and panic attacks originate.

Learn them at least a few hours apart, and preferably on different days, in the morning, or early afternoon. Use the one you find most effective. A minimum of 10 mns is recommended; 15 is better, and 20 is ideally preferred. Optimal results come from use twice daily, morning, and early afternoon, if possible, but once is fine, and is probably more realistically achievable in most households today.

My previous post about anxiety may be viewed at: http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?33964-New-to-the-site-and-looking-for-help&p=223989#post223989

STRESS: http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?34403-Having-a-hard-time-coping&p=225979&posted=1#post225979