Spaceturtle
06-25-2016, 10:59 PM
Currently on Buspar 15mg a day and I'm miserable. This being only the second day I know people often have issues the first few days but I am feeling miserable, almost too miserable to type this out.
I sometimes wonder if I am the worst person out there, I am losing the energy and determination to put up with this anymore. Typing this is a lot of effort even though I type really fast but here we go.
My attitude:
My heart rate is constantly high due to anxiety, the rare moment I am not anxious it goes down to 55 bpm so I know its a heart issue.
I constantly check my pulse and blood pressure.
Extreme fear of not being able to get help fast enough if I need it.
Constant loneliness feeling (mainly because I am alone in an empty house most of the day).
Constant worrying about when I am going to go crazy.
Don't feel like anything will help.
Don't even want to deal with this, too much effort to fight it even though I have to.
My anxiety prevents me from EVERYTHING
I can't even drive or go to the store anymore.
I get anxious doing the following:
Showering, walking up stairs, brushing teeth, cleaning, trying to sleep, the list goes on. I won't even go over things like going out and stuff because I don't do that anymore.
Basically 95% of my existence is anxiety. Is there anyone out there who is bad as I am?
I sometimes wonder if I am the worst person out there, I am losing the energy and determination to put up with this anymore. Typing this is a lot of effort even though I type really fast but here we go.
My attitude:
My heart rate is constantly high due to anxiety, the rare moment I am not anxious it goes down to 55 bpm so I know its a heart issue.
I constantly check my pulse and blood pressure.
Extreme fear of not being able to get help fast enough if I need it.
Constant loneliness feeling (mainly because I am alone in an empty house most of the day).
Constant worrying about when I am going to go crazy.
Don't feel like anything will help.
Don't even want to deal with this, too much effort to fight it even though I have to.
My anxiety prevents me from EVERYTHING
I can't even drive or go to the store anymore.
I get anxious doing the following:
Showering, walking up stairs, brushing teeth, cleaning, trying to sleep, the list goes on. I won't even go over things like going out and stuff because I don't do that anymore.
Basically 95% of my existence is anxiety. Is there anyone out there who is bad as I am?