Driving anxiety

[Bergen]

I had an incident the other day when I was driving, and my anxiety has been through the roof ever since. I was parking and I felt a bump and heard a noise. I thought I ran over something, but then I thought, what if I bumped into the car next to me? I pulled into the spot a little close. I glanced at the other car for a second and didn't see any obvious damage, but I didn't really inspect. I went into the store, but after a few minutes I started panicking.

I just got my license, so this was a new situation and didn't realize what to do right away. I decided to text my mom about what to do, but I left my phone in my car. I went to go get it like 5-10 minutes later, but the the car was gone.

By the time I got home, I was close to panic, and against my better judgement, I started googling things. On yahoo answers it said the police will track you down and you can spend 3 years in jail for hit and run. It's been 2 days, but apparently even weeks later the police will show up.I feel like my whole life is over. I don't even know if I actually hit it. I've been in a subtle panic since. I don't really have anyone to talk to,and the people I have consulted said it's not a big deal. I know my anxiety is probably making a mountain out of a mole hill, but I don't know what to do. I was so anxious, I called my therapist at 12am and talked to her because I didn't want her to wonder what happened to me if I got arrested.

It's even worse because my mom already doesn't trust me to drive. She's one of those parents that freaks out when their kid is behind the wheel no matter what. I feel like I have to be perfect, or else it just proves I'm incompetent.

I was so excited to finally have the independence with driving, but now I'm terrified.

[Anne1221]

You probably did run over something like a soft drink cup. People throw things like that on the ground. Go with your first instinct. If you thought you ran over something then you did not hit the car next to you. No one is going to come find you. And even if they did, you would say that you thought you ran over something. There's really no way for them to track you down though. Hit and run and being arrested and going to jail is if you RUN OVER A PERSON and KNOW YOU HIT A PERSON and then left. You have absolutely nothing to worry about. Don't text and drive!

[Linda0818]

Honey, that happens to just about everyone. I've been in that situation as well. Sometimes I find absolutely nothing, i.e. no real reason for the noise I heard. I agree with Anne, you probably just ran over something in the parking lot. But even if you did hit another car, there would be no way for them to track you down, unless the whole 'incident' was caught on camera. And even if that were the case, you would have heard something by now. I've never heard of cops showing up to somebody's house weeks later for hitting another car in a parking lot.

If that ever happens again, to give yourself peace of mind, thoroughly inspect both vehicles for damage. If there's damage to the other car and you can't locate the owner (like inside the store, etc) then just leave a note on their windshield under the wiper, giving them your name and number, telling them you're very sorry, but you hit their car in the parking lot. It's nothing to be terrified of. To use an old cliche, shit happens. I clipped somebody's bumper once in a parking garage. There was no visible damage, but I still left them a note and I never did hear from them, as they probably felt there was no need to involve our insurance companies over damage, if any, that you couldn't even see.

[foreman]

Dont worry if you would do what you think police was at your door so far .Probably you just hit only something insignifiant

[mindglobe]

Hi Bergen,

Anxiety due to driving is a common fear.

I talked about common fears and how to overcome situations like these in a guide-article.

Feel free to have a look here (http://mind-globe.com/common-fears/).

Let me know what do you think,
Have a good day :)

[Linda0818]

I used to have panic attacks in my car. And ever since the first time it happened, I'm now paranoid of it happening again. So before I even drive to work, I take an ativan about an hour before. And it's not good, really, because now I take the ativan whether I really need it or not, just because I'm fearful of having another panic attack while driving. And it has happened a couple more times since that first time. But until that first time, it never even crossed my mind that I could panic behind the wheel. And while I don't have full-blown panic attacks in my car anymore, it's because I almost EXPECT it to happen that I'll feel lightheaded while driving. I know it's all in my mind, but it's something I haven't been able to get myself over yet.

[KeepYourCalm]

First of all, thanks for sharing!

Like several posters above said already, I think you're going to be fine.

I know the feeling though. I have terrile driving anxiety to this day - and I've been driving for about 4 years now.

Let me tell you a personal story that might help you with the situation you're in.

Right after I got my driving license I was reverse-parking the car in front of my mom's place in between two other cars. I was super cautious and I was looking left and right and over my shoulder frantically to make sure I wouldn't hit anything. And then just when I least expected it, I heard a loud bump and the car immediately came to a shaky halt - and the engine stopped.

Judging by the sound of it, I immediately thought that I had caused some major damage and I started panicking. The worst part was that I was looking everywhere while parking the car and it still happened. I immediately thought to myself "it goes to show what a lousy driver I am. I just got my license and I hit something already."

It's interesting that my mind immediately used the event to justify my driving anxiety.

I got out of the car, looked at it expecting to see a huge dent... but all I saw was a tiny scratch the size of a fingernail. It turned out that there had been a tree stump right behind the car that was too low to be seen from any of the mirrors and I had hit that. That was it.

And the best part was that even though I thought I had caused some major damage, there was only a tiny scratch on the back of the car that I was barely able to notice at all. I panicked and beat myself up over something so trivial.

My mother-in-law always tells me that when you drive, you inevitably bump into things. It just happens and it happens to everyone at some point. Just make sure you watch your speed so you don't cause any real damage.

Since then I've bumped into actual cars and I've always found that people are incredibly understanding and nobody wants to make a big deal out of it unless the damage is big. And since you said you were parking the car, even if by some miracle you did hit another car, the damage would probably be insignificant becasue you were going so slow.

The bottom line is, I think you shouldn't worry about it at all. On the contrary: pat yourself on the back becasue you've learned a valuable lesson. Think of this as rite of passage. Now you're one step closer to being an experienced driver! :)

[Linda0818]

I wish Bergen would come back and give us an update. I mean, how do we know he/she isn't sitting in jail by now? LOL

Yoohoo, Bergen! Where ya at???