Need some help here!

[Slammed_vdub]

Hey everyone,
Long story short ive had anxety, OCD for years now. It was mainly health anxiety as i always think i have a tumor or something wrong with me. But tonight that is not the topic at hand. About a year ago me and my ex brokeup which was devastating. We were together since highschool for 6 years. I literally grew up with her at my side. I thought she was the one. She was forced to move away and the long distance thing didnt work out. I tried dating again and going out. Nothing helped. I cant stop thinking about her day in and day out. The more i fight it, the worse it is. It doesn't help i still live in the area we dated so EVERYTHING remind me of her. and i mean everything. I am trying to prepare myself to leave for the cost guard, but my anxiety is always high because of the depression im in. I need to be mentally prepared which i am the opposite of. I go to the gym everyday and work 12 hours a day. I am always busy, yet i still think of her. I just wish i could find someone who i cold spoil and look forward to coming home too, that would make me forget all about her. Im 23 by the way,so yes i am young haha. Anyone have any advice? Honestly i feel like i am near the edge without any way down besides the quick way and the clock is ticking.

Thanks

[Kirk]

I am 59 and have been married almost 30 years. My first marriage lasted 3 and a half years and my first wife was cheating on me, sleeping with someone every night of the week.
I was very distraught for a while. While i college, I dated a girl who I thought was the one, until she dumped me. You will get over this and will meet someone new when you
least expect it.

[Nowuccas]

Hey Slammed_vdub,

A previous post follows, modified for you:

BREAKUPS:
Firmly resolve now to stop thinking about the person involved. Make yourself exercise, and go out, even if you don't enjoy it, at first: it will provide one way of stopping you from thinking about your present life situation. Understand that memories fade, with the passing of time, and ask yourself where you will be in 5 years time, and 10. Most people go through similar things, though not to the same extent, and it's common for many relationships to begin, and end, especially when younger. Use the following: Technique for Re-Programming Negative Thoughts: When you notice something negative, such as: "I can't do this/ am never going to get over this!" or: "Why am I always so pathetic/useless/such a loser?" or even an image, emotion, or a memory; recognise that it is being generated from the negative part of your mind. Having identified and labelled it, visualise a large, red, flashing, "STOP!" sign, and/or possibly a stern faced person wagging an index finger at you in a negative manner, then say to yourself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!"

You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick". In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary. Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method. It's a good idea to only emotionally invest in a relationship, according to its length of time, and the degree of commitment from BOTH of the people involved. Express your feelings in a letter, and either post it, unaddressed, or have a ceremony, and burn it safely in a metal container, and flush the ashes down the toilet, symbolically ending the relationship, which has zero potential for anything, except causing you further distress. Give time a chance to heal, then open yourself to the possibility of a relationship with someone new.

Relevant reading: How to Heal a Broken Heart in 30 Days: A Day-by-Day Guide to Saying Good-bye and Getting On With Your Life, by Howard Bronson and Mike Riley, & Getting Past Your Break-Up: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing that Ever Happened to You, by Susan J. Elliott, JD, MSEd. Google supplies or try Amazon.com.

At: http://www.2knowmyself.com you may want to try: "How to get over someone" (top left hand side).

At http://www.wikihow.com enter "breakups" in the searchbar. Try your bookstore, library database, or the searchbar at http://www.amazon.com for: Breaking Up Without Breaking Down by Kristina de la Cal & When It's Over : How to Mend that Broken Heart by Darren G. Burton. Also see: http://www.everydayhealth.com/emotional-health/handling-a-breakup.aspx?xid=nl_EverydayHealthEmotionalHealth_ 20100509 & http://www.breakupgirl.net

Hypnosis is merely a heightened state of suggestibility, in which you are better able to communicate with your subconscious mind; view http://myfavoriteinterests.com/hypnosis/ about what it is, and isn't. 85% of people are suggestible to some degree; 15% - 20% highly so, and 15% - 20% aren't much at all, so you could either preferably seek professional hypnotherapy, or consider: "Handle Getting Over A Lover" Self-Hypnosis CD (Audio) by Steve G. Jones, M. Ed. https://www.google.com.au/search?client=opera&q="Handle+Getting+Over+A+Lover"+Self-Hypnosis+CD+(Audio)+by+Steve+G.+Jones%2C+M.+Ed.&sourceid=opera&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8 and
http://www.asktheinternettherapist.com has Letting Go of the Past CD - MP3, & Get Over a Relationship, CD - MP3, Getting Over the Loss of a Love CD - MP3., and at:
http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com there is "Getting Over a Relationship" & "Ending a Relationship"or Let It Go - Hypnosis Download.

Professional advice is to use preferably only 1, or a maximum of 2 at any one time.

My previous posts about OCD and Generalised Anxiety Disorder may be viewed at
http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?34502-A-last-resort-Please-someone-tell-me-i-m-not-alone-in-this-(&p=226374#post226374 and
http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?33964-New-to-the-site-and-looking-for-help&p=223989#post223989 respectively.

[bbryan0004]

Poor guy.
I assume you are a guy.
Sounds pretty normal given the situation.
Stay strong and make a commitment to be happy.
The pain will ease with time. Who knows maybe you two could find each other again if it's meant to be