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View Full Version : Long Time suffering looking for some suggestions



Alfonso12
03-15-2016, 10:07 PM
A bit about me and my history battling with Anxiety and depression. In 1997 I had my first very big panic attack after smoking a joint. I had no idea what was happening and was rushed to the ER where they thought I was having a heart attack. The next morning I felt fine, got up and was on my way to school when I had another one. Again, I took myself to the hospital. This happened a few more times, until I showed up at my parents home and told them what was happening. I went to our family doctor and was instantly prescribed Zoloft. This was the beginning of a very long and horrible period in my life. I soon became house bound and didn't leave for a month or more. I didn't know what was worse the side effects of the zoloft or the panic attacks. Long story short I finally received help from a Therapist and after many sessions I slowly began to enter back into society, albeit very much stricken with what would end up being a long term battle with anxiety and depression. After many years I finally weened myself off of zoloft and was not taking medication at all. Then, on a trip to a far away city I was stuck by myself in a hotel room in the middle of know where during a terrible winter storm. I again had a huge panic attack which started the spiral all over again. After many years and doing a lot of self help and reading etc., I eventually switched to Ciprolex as the side effects of the Zoloft where very bad. So for the last few years I continued with about 20 to 30 mg's of Cipralex while taking between 1 and 1.5 Mgs of clonazapam every day. In the last 6 months I started feeling unwell again and my Dr. (Psychiatrist), stated that it was the Cipralex that was "pooping" out and after switching to a few other SSRI's I ended up back to Zoloft. I'm currently taking 150mgs. as well as 1mg of Clonazapam. This doctor is that type that seems to think that more and a higher dosage is better, but I don't think he has ever suffered the effects of these drugs. I can't really tell if the Zoloft is really any better than anything else. I took 200mgs for 2 days just to see what would happen and I think it was better at curbing my anxiety but the switch back to 150mgs was brutal. Just a footnote, I am and have always been a fighter and a high functioning person with anxiety and depression. As my doctor says, people can't really see that you are suffering from the outside. I have been in Finance and Banking for a majority of my career. Anxiety has left it's mark on me many times though with many sick days off and days in which the only real answer other than the other one is to take 1mg of Clonazapam and spend the day sleeping. Which funny enough makes me feel better after, although the guilt of not being at work comes back to haunt me with added anxiety. Don't yo love this disorder. So here I sit, deciding if I should continue with the Zoloft (its been about 3 weeks), or take a 180 and speak to a Naturopath. I've read that St. John's Wart can really work combined with CBT. Does anyone sale feel the same way that the side effects of the meds can be as damaging and cause as much suffering that the anxiety? So any help, recommendations or suggestions would be greatly appreciated at this point. As I just joined the Forum today I didn't know which section to start in. Thanks for listening.

Ponder
03-15-2016, 11:50 PM
Hi Alfonso12. My experience has not been so well with medication. I am one of those people that suffers adverse side effects to most of the meds I took. Other medications that seem to work; eventually lost their effect and had me worse off in the end. But that's my experiences and it's pretty much different with different people. Thus, giving advice regarding medications often ends up more like begging the question.

What works for me is ongoing psychotherapy, being a participant in a service that provides a mentor friend that visits weekly, going to a group meeting with peers like myself once a week, learning about mindfulness, eating healthy, keeping active and of course journalling in this forum and helping out where I can.

I do other things, but don't want to overwhelm you with too much text. It's was not easy coming off the medications:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zw3ZI_plKYo

Yea yea - I have shown this link before. I show it because I'm now off the meds but then was only just weaning. If anything, I should update.

I will contrast with this Video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LMKYaQ6GVjI

In my opinion - I am way more relaxed these days. I still have issues, BUT I am nowhere near as depressed as when I was on the medications. This was only done the other week and has taken me a lot of work ... BUT - I knew deep down what I had to do - without begging the question. (Which understandably many of us do out of sheer despair or other times when we lack the courage and of course "energy") Most of my posts are more aimed at myself despite begging questions ... but in the end - I have learned what matters most; is the man in the mirror.

For me - there was no way in hell I could implement the above strategies whilst being medicated like I was.

My advice - Is to ditch what you know does not work for you, and go with what you know. (if that be medication - then fine - go with that ... only you will know) I just had to reach a point where I could not bear to live any-more. The medication in my book ... did little and in many respects, prolong and caused much more grief than it could of otherwise been.

I was suicidal and borderline paranoia - now I am just another human yet to run his course.

Each to their own.

Good luck with whatever path you take.

Srry I could not be more clearer - late afternoon here.

Just wanted to say something other than not.

- Welcome to the forum. :)

Alfonso12
03-16-2016, 12:16 AM
Thanks Dave. I appreciate it.