PLEASE READ AND REPLY -Worry/Anxiety

[Christheanxiousone]

PLEASE READ AND RESPOND: I feel utterly hopeless tonight. I have these cycles of anxiety that always lead to worry. Lately I have been on an anxiety driven worry kick about my future. I live with my grandpa, I am 22, I am worried that I will never be successful, worried about my future, worried about what I'll do with my agoraphobia, worried that the worry will make me go insane or depressed or unable to cope until I can figure out a solid solution to my future. How in the hell do I get over this? Embrace the worries/fear/anxiety? Does this ever shut off? I've been like this once before and it went away, yesterday was a decent day, not as bad as this, but at least the f****** anxiety wasn't this bad.

[Nowuccas]

Hey Christheanxiousone,

My approach would be to learn, and employ an effective anti-anxiety breathing technique, so that you know that you can cope with them.

Learn, and employ an anti-anxiety technique, such as Progressive Muscle Relaxation, or EFT.

View my post about agoraphobia at http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?34181-Fear-of-getting-out&p=224994#post224994

The following is from my post about anxiety / worry:

Limit "worrying time" to 30 - 45 mns, daily, possibly when you get home, or after your evening meal, but not too close to bedtime, after which, resolve firmly to refuse to worry again on that day. Understand that to do otherwise would be counterproductive to your mental health, and enjoyment of life. Having had your "worry time" for the day, you can just write down any more thoughts that come to mind, and say to yourself: "Well, I'll just have to worry about that tomorrow, won't I?".

It's important to regularly monitor, and deal with a negative internal monologue (self talk), or mental process, such as disturbing thoughts, images, impulses, or emotions, by the process of (a): recognising it, and (b): challenging it immediately. Technique For Re-Programming Negative Thoughts: When you notice something negative, such as: "I can't do this/ am never going to get over this!" or: "Why am I always so useless/such a loser?" or even an image, emotion, or a memory; recognise that it is being generated from the negative part of your mind.

After identifying, and labelling it, visualise a large, red, flashing, "STOP!" sign, and/or possibly a stern faced person wagging an index finger at you in a negative manner, then say to yourself as forcefully as you can, even aloud in a big voice, if alone: "I know this tactic: GO AWAY FOR A WHILE !!!" You may want to use either: "ruse", "ploy", "game", or "trick". In the case of an image, visualise a large "STOP" sign, or your preferred version. Some people go so far as to keep a wide rubber band in their pocket, then put it around their wrist, when they catch themselves backsliding, stretch and release it, as a method of reprogramming their mind sooner, but I don't regard it as being strictly necessary.

Remember to remove it, afterwards, if you use this method. Try replacing a negative thought with a positive affirmation of your choice, like: "I am a unique individual, with my own set of skills, and good points", or "I may not be perfect, but I'm doing the best I can, right now".

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I suggest making a life plan, divided into readily attainable stages, (tertiary qualifications, trade school or local business? marriage and children? etc.) then begin to implement it, marking them off as you go, and celebrating important milestones. Be prepared to change it if necessary.

It would help put a face on your fears, and reduce uncertainty.