post christmas new year blues

[cloudy black]

hi peeps i just cant get back from this black precipice i am stuck in a very dark spot. everyone else might be "back to normal," but i aint not by a long chalk. and i have concerns about my coping mechs... as they are showing signs of disintegrating.

[Fahrenheit]

Hey cloudy. Sorry to hear you are still stuck in a dark place. I know that can be incredible lonely, especially when it seems like everyone around you is getting better and you keep hearing peoples success or progress stories and you just don't relate to any of them. Stories about other peoples struggles can be helpful and comforting, but there have definitely been times were i have felt alienated or discouraged when I felt I was the only one not getting any better.

tell me more about your coping mechs. what have you done before, how have they helped in the past, and what doesn't seem to be working now?

i think doing the work can help get you out of a rough spot, but there are times when things are shit and the things that do help don't start really making a difference for a looming time. i know that isn't necessarily comforting, but i think it helps if you are patient with yourself when you are suffering. try to do what you can to help yourself, but don't feel guilty if those things don't work the way you want them to. it is hard. sitting with your pain, alone with it, and trying to hold onto a little equanimity when you know the pain is not going away for a while is hard work. I'm rooting for you!

keep talking to us. feel free to pm me if you just need to talk as well.

[cloudy black]

hello Fahrenheit thanks so much for taking the trouble to reply as i am typing this i cant see what i am typing for crying and i dont do that a great deal but just lately in the last 4 weeks...
its ok that other people are doing ok i can still be happy for them, i just think maybe one day......some of my coping mechs are writing lists and being organised in an attempt to cut myself some slack. and having a network of people ...will explain in PM. I did ring up a support line this morning and that helped. But its not going to take away all of the difficulties away. I have for so long last year been doing my utmost to keep a positive spin on things.

For the most part I push into it and keep going in spite of the various MH issues but there was no push left in me today. I am trying to get the simple things back on board like cooking and eating and going to bed and that’s the best right now. "staying on the rails, only just, but the price keeps going up" would be an analogy that would be fitting i think.