DiMENSiON
10-24-2015, 01:23 AM
Hi everyone :)
I just signed up on this forums and it feels good to become part of a big community where alikes can share their experiences. I will tell you about my situation.
Ever since childhood I saw myself as an introvert and avoided social interactions as much as I could. My teachers from my early school years, always told my parents that I am too silent and never active in class discussions. But you know, I liked to be in a position where I observe rather than interact and thought it always was a matter of introversion and lack of social skills. In high school I was in a Computer Programming class and I kind of felt comfortable with being around people with same avoidance of social situations. Most of the times, I studied late hours at home and it felt as if I was learning better when I was alone in the dark. Noticing this really paid off and I graduated high school with top grades.
The years past and I moved to a much warmer location for higher education studies. I saw this an opportunity for me to become a different person and maybe I could overcome my avoidance of social interactions. As I studied Business Administration; I had Behavioral Science classes focusing on Learning & Personality Development and started to become more aware of my situation. I started to take notes about how I felt from time to time and noticed that I mostly suffered from anxiety during summer and daytime. When anxiety takes control, I feel like a different person. My body feels worked-up, my memory is taking a hit and so does my cognitive skills. Searching on the internet made me find the term "brain fog" and it describes my condition perfectly. I remember my classes at driving school and how badly I screwed up from time to time when my brain went blank and how stupid I felt, it all made sense now.
Since last summer, I have got a daytime job as a manager and it feels worse than ever. Now, I am not as flexible as in school and have to perform constantly. Worst of all is that I work daytime and during summers I feel worthless. Not can I focus, nor can I perform. I feel anxious constantly and this keeps me from learning and doing some real work. Even a phone call is enough to make bells go off. The feeling of not being able to perform, makes it even worse and I can not wait to go home and relax. Also, another thing I have noticed is that I am avoiding conflicts and it feels like the world has come to an end after I have argued with someone or I have done something bad in general.
Now when the summer and its sunny days are over, I finally begin to feel normal again. My self-esteem recovers and I do not feel like I want to avoid social interactions. Is anyone else out there feeling the same? Do you have any tricks to overcome or at least minimize the symptoms?
I just signed up on this forums and it feels good to become part of a big community where alikes can share their experiences. I will tell you about my situation.
Ever since childhood I saw myself as an introvert and avoided social interactions as much as I could. My teachers from my early school years, always told my parents that I am too silent and never active in class discussions. But you know, I liked to be in a position where I observe rather than interact and thought it always was a matter of introversion and lack of social skills. In high school I was in a Computer Programming class and I kind of felt comfortable with being around people with same avoidance of social situations. Most of the times, I studied late hours at home and it felt as if I was learning better when I was alone in the dark. Noticing this really paid off and I graduated high school with top grades.
The years past and I moved to a much warmer location for higher education studies. I saw this an opportunity for me to become a different person and maybe I could overcome my avoidance of social interactions. As I studied Business Administration; I had Behavioral Science classes focusing on Learning & Personality Development and started to become more aware of my situation. I started to take notes about how I felt from time to time and noticed that I mostly suffered from anxiety during summer and daytime. When anxiety takes control, I feel like a different person. My body feels worked-up, my memory is taking a hit and so does my cognitive skills. Searching on the internet made me find the term "brain fog" and it describes my condition perfectly. I remember my classes at driving school and how badly I screwed up from time to time when my brain went blank and how stupid I felt, it all made sense now.
Since last summer, I have got a daytime job as a manager and it feels worse than ever. Now, I am not as flexible as in school and have to perform constantly. Worst of all is that I work daytime and during summers I feel worthless. Not can I focus, nor can I perform. I feel anxious constantly and this keeps me from learning and doing some real work. Even a phone call is enough to make bells go off. The feeling of not being able to perform, makes it even worse and I can not wait to go home and relax. Also, another thing I have noticed is that I am avoiding conflicts and it feels like the world has come to an end after I have argued with someone or I have done something bad in general.
Now when the summer and its sunny days are over, I finally begin to feel normal again. My self-esteem recovers and I do not feel like I want to avoid social interactions. Is anyone else out there feeling the same? Do you have any tricks to overcome or at least minimize the symptoms?