jahall18
09-20-2015, 09:11 AM
Hi Guys,
I have dealt with anxiety for most of my life...as early as second grade. I would go to school and immediately get sick and throw up and cry to go home. I think it was a severe homesickness and anxiety with panic attacks. My psychiatrist at the time diagnosed me with Social Anxiety Disorder. I actually had to go to a special school for almost an entire school year in seventh grade. I pushed through, graduated high school, and went on to graduate from college. I am a temporary employee at a large organization and have only been there for 3-4 days. My third day I had to go home early because I had such a bad panic attack that I got sick, started crying, and couldn't calm down. I am supposed to go back on Monday (tomorrow), but my supervisor is aware of the situation and told me I could take the day off if I still needed to.
Employee health's nurse practitioner put me on Lexapro 10mg and I have been taking it faithfully since, but she did say I would need to give it 3-4 weeks before I could say it works or not (though it has worked in the past). She also suggested getting my B vitamin level up using a liquid solution rather than a tablet. I bought some and have been doing it since.
Here is where I think my anxiety is coming to play...I take the bus to work now because I am an hour and 15 minutes from work. It is a temporary position for 90 days, but I am fearing I won't even make it past this week if this keeps going. I don't want to drive because I have an older car with a lot of miles on it and don't want to break down. I get really anxious just driving to the bus station...then I get anxious on the bus, and then as we get closer to my work place I start having panic attacks (heart races, extreme nausea, my throat feels like its closing, I sometimes start to cry or my eyes will water, and I can't seem to calm down easily. All day at work I get mini attacks and I have almost completely lost my appetite. I don't eat anything at work and when I get home my appetite comes back a little and I eat only something small before I can't eat anymore.
I have been given the option of resigning with no penalty (they won't red flag me or put any bad marks on my employee record there), but I fear that it would look really bad on me if I left and a future employer found out I was only there for a few days before I left, but I keep telling myself this might be best for me at this point. I thought I had outgrew this in college as I did pretty well (graduated with honors, was VP of my student organization, etc.). Clearly I did not outgrow it.
Does anyone have any advice or suggestions for me at this time? If quitting is my only option I will, but I hope not to.
I have dealt with anxiety for most of my life...as early as second grade. I would go to school and immediately get sick and throw up and cry to go home. I think it was a severe homesickness and anxiety with panic attacks. My psychiatrist at the time diagnosed me with Social Anxiety Disorder. I actually had to go to a special school for almost an entire school year in seventh grade. I pushed through, graduated high school, and went on to graduate from college. I am a temporary employee at a large organization and have only been there for 3-4 days. My third day I had to go home early because I had such a bad panic attack that I got sick, started crying, and couldn't calm down. I am supposed to go back on Monday (tomorrow), but my supervisor is aware of the situation and told me I could take the day off if I still needed to.
Employee health's nurse practitioner put me on Lexapro 10mg and I have been taking it faithfully since, but she did say I would need to give it 3-4 weeks before I could say it works or not (though it has worked in the past). She also suggested getting my B vitamin level up using a liquid solution rather than a tablet. I bought some and have been doing it since.
Here is where I think my anxiety is coming to play...I take the bus to work now because I am an hour and 15 minutes from work. It is a temporary position for 90 days, but I am fearing I won't even make it past this week if this keeps going. I don't want to drive because I have an older car with a lot of miles on it and don't want to break down. I get really anxious just driving to the bus station...then I get anxious on the bus, and then as we get closer to my work place I start having panic attacks (heart races, extreme nausea, my throat feels like its closing, I sometimes start to cry or my eyes will water, and I can't seem to calm down easily. All day at work I get mini attacks and I have almost completely lost my appetite. I don't eat anything at work and when I get home my appetite comes back a little and I eat only something small before I can't eat anymore.
I have been given the option of resigning with no penalty (they won't red flag me or put any bad marks on my employee record there), but I fear that it would look really bad on me if I left and a future employer found out I was only there for a few days before I left, but I keep telling myself this might be best for me at this point. I thought I had outgrew this in college as I did pretty well (graduated with honors, was VP of my student organization, etc.). Clearly I did not outgrow it.
Does anyone have any advice or suggestions for me at this time? If quitting is my only option I will, but I hope not to.