AsktheAges
09-17-2015, 12:40 AM
It's 1:27 am. I've got to teach two classes today. The morning class isn't prepared at all. I've been busy but I also just wasn't able to focus yesterday. I'm very very anxious about my partner's health condition and what it will mean for our relationship. I don't know what I can or should do about it, especially now that we're long distance.
My brain tends to block out present-day stresses, sorrows, and anxieties with anger rumination: I dwell on situations from the past, usually with my family but sometimes with friends (or 'friends'), that I feel angry about and run them over and over in my head, growing angrier until, in the worst cases, I yell out to myself or punch the air or even strike objects or strike myself. I've been told that this sort of obsessive behaviour is another kind of anxiety. I thought I was largely over the worst of it but it has been recurring badly recently. My partner really dislikes this behaviour (so maybe it is good that we are long distance right now?) Does anyone else experience this?
I tried to just go to bed around 11:40, setting my alarm for just after 6, thinking I'd be able to quickly prep things in a couple of hours in the morning, but I haven't been able to sleep much at all. I feel completely exhausted now, not able to really work, but also not able to relax enough to sleep. I tried some progressive muscle relaxation. Right now, at least the things that make me angry don't seem so serious in the same way. I'm able to look at them more objectively. But my brain runs over things related to my lecture and it seems so overwhelming: I've studied so much about this subject that I don't even know where to begin - there's so much to say!
I just need a few hours of sleep. I can't function without it, especially since I'd need to be on campus from about 10:30 am to 9 pm today. I may end up having to call in sick today, not as an excuse but because I'll actually be sick from stress and lack of sleep!
My brain tends to block out present-day stresses, sorrows, and anxieties with anger rumination: I dwell on situations from the past, usually with my family but sometimes with friends (or 'friends'), that I feel angry about and run them over and over in my head, growing angrier until, in the worst cases, I yell out to myself or punch the air or even strike objects or strike myself. I've been told that this sort of obsessive behaviour is another kind of anxiety. I thought I was largely over the worst of it but it has been recurring badly recently. My partner really dislikes this behaviour (so maybe it is good that we are long distance right now?) Does anyone else experience this?
I tried to just go to bed around 11:40, setting my alarm for just after 6, thinking I'd be able to quickly prep things in a couple of hours in the morning, but I haven't been able to sleep much at all. I feel completely exhausted now, not able to really work, but also not able to relax enough to sleep. I tried some progressive muscle relaxation. Right now, at least the things that make me angry don't seem so serious in the same way. I'm able to look at them more objectively. But my brain runs over things related to my lecture and it seems so overwhelming: I've studied so much about this subject that I don't even know where to begin - there's so much to say!
I just need a few hours of sleep. I can't function without it, especially since I'd need to be on campus from about 10:30 am to 9 pm today. I may end up having to call in sick today, not as an excuse but because I'll actually be sick from stress and lack of sleep!