Anxiety from loss of purpose and left with own thoughts

[matty_t]

Hey guys, so I've suffered through a number of different anxiety 'phases', one of which I am going through now and it all seems too clear what the problem actually is. I am a student doing a PhD at the moment, however before I decided what I actually wanted to do, I went through extreme anxiety - not knowing where my life was going. Though it appears to be even tougher than that - after big projects that I have worked on for uni, as soon as they are immediately done I feel like I have lost purpose, and the thought of not having things to occupy my time frightens me to the point of panic attacks. On top of that, when I find that I cannot distract myself in any way (effectively), I start developing anxious thoughts...and a longing to be home in front of a computer, or to do some more work in order to distract myself. When this usually can't be achieved, I go into panic mode.

If anyone has experienced this, do I need extra structure in my life? The thing is...I know I won't always have ways to distract myself from my thoughts (I can't work forever), so is it a matter of being comfortable with my own thoughts? Trying to live through downtime where nothing has really been planned? Because these prospects scare me like crazy - I can't stand not having something I must be doing or must be preparing for.

Does anyone have any tips on how to be more comfortable with a life that isn't always structured?

Thanks

[Silhouette]

I am a little bit similar. I'm doing my honours year now, but plan to continue to a PhD next year. I find that the summer holidays are always the worst time for me, mostly for the same reason, I don't have something occupying my time. Have you thought about CBT if you want to be able to cope better when you aren't busy? It doesn't always work, but can be a great option for becoming more comfortable with your thoughts. If you really need more things to occupy your time when you're not studying, you could maybe consider volunteer work? Obviously a lot of paid work is hard to maintain when you're studying most of the time and only on breaks for short periods, but some volunteer work, preferably related to your area of study, could be helpful. Or some kind of project that isn't related to uni but that you can work on in the periods in between (e.g. writing a book or something else that interests you)