Anxiety and Avoidance

[lotus]

Hello, I'm new here and looking for an honest place to vent. I'm not a stranger to anxiety, when I was about 10 I developed an intense fear/phobia that one of my family members was going to die.. I snapped out of it after a few months and haven't had another full blown "episode" until now...

I'm in my 20s and can't believe this is happening again at this age, but things have gotten bad. I've been dealing with agoraphobia, I've stopped going to my classes and can barely leave my room some days lately. I have to email my professors and see if there's any way they'll still allow me to turn things in late, but I have no valid excuse for missing class and getting this behind so I fear the worst. I have an issue with avoidance in general but the endless vicious cycle is becoming unbearable-the more overwhelmed I feel the more I avoid things, and the more I avoid the worse things get. The main issue is school right now but it could be anything really.

From my understanding avoidance can become a compulsion? I now understand my first phobia was probably a form of OCD, the fear became an obsession and I had certain rituals or compulsions to help "manage" the anxiety. As irrational as that seemed at least there was a specific fear to address, with agoraphobia and avoidance I'm lost on where to start..

Just wondering if anyone can relate or has any thoughts.

[gypsylee]

Hello, I'm new here and looking for an honest place to vent. I'm not a stranger to anxiety, when I was about 10 I developed an intense fear/phobia that one of my family members was going to die.. I snapped out of it after a few months and haven't had another full blown "episode" until now...

I'm in my 20s and can't believe this is happening again at this age, but things have gotten bad. I've been dealing with agoraphobia, I've stopped going to my classes and can barely leave my room some days lately. I have to email my professors and see if there's any way they'll still allow me to turn things in late, but I have no valid excuse for missing class and getting this behind so I fear the worst. I have an issue with avoidance in general but the endless vicious cycle is becoming unbearable-the more overwhelmed I feel the more I avoid things, and the more I avoid the worse things get. The main issue is school right now but it could be anything really.

From my understanding avoidance can become a compulsion? I now understand my first phobia was probably a form of OCD, the fear became an obsession and I had certain rituals or compulsions to help "manage" the anxiety. As irrational as that seemed at least there was a specific fear to address, with agoraphobia and avoidance I'm lost on where to start..

Just wondering if anyone can relate or has any thoughts.

Hey and welcome :)

I completely understand. Social phobia and agoraphobia are my thing. I'm not sure about the link between OCD/compulsions though - they're all just ways of trying to minimise the anxiety I guess, but I don't think avoidance becomes a compulsion? I don't know. But I know that feeling where you just CANNOT face leaving your house and seeing people.

A few things have helped me: SSRIs (Prozac, Zoloft, Lexapro); forcing myself to face what I am avoiding; self-acceptance; talking to others eg. places like this. Also things like breathing techniques, exercise and meditation.

Where to start? See a GP if you have one you can talk to. They might give you meds and/or a referral to a therapist. Talking to people here is a good start because there are some masters of anxiety here. Anxiety absolutely thrives on isolation, so get it out there as much as you can.

All the best,
Gypsy x

[BrookeLynnnn]

Your situation is much like mine.. I'm off school & work thanks to agoraphobia. This is my second time around with agoraphobia. First time I got meds. Now I'm pregnant & had to get off them. Currently suffering again.

Not sure if you're male or female but I would suggest you reading "Agorafabulous by Sara Benincasa."

It's a book about her life with agoraphobia & it's truly amazing. She is now a comedian & has another book out & she flys all over the world. She's a normal person with panic attacks. I follow her on all social media lol. Check out the book :)

[Mr Jingles]

You said: "the more overwhelmed I feel the more I avoid things, and the more I avoid the worse things get."

This is a challenge for me also. I agree with the other posters, for me anxiety and panic is like drowning, I don't like drowning, so life becomes about avoiding drowning. Is this a compulsion? I'm not an expert. Does it make sense? It does to me, from experience.

Another hard thing about your experience can be that you see you're in a loop, a trap, but you can't get out. For me it's like quick sand, the harder I struggle, the worse it gets. Like quicksand, anxiety seems to be teaching me the only way out is to let go a little, assess the situation... And then move slowly, at a pace you can handle.

Seeing a doctor or psychologist could be helpful too. Definitely worth considering.

How is your social support? Do you have anyone you can confide in? I've found that helpful.

You are not alone. We can't leave the house if we're convinced by our fear that annihilation lurks outside the door.