Public speaking

[Teacher]

Hi,

I am a teacher and I suffer from general anxiety. My anxiety is heightened with groups larger than around 3 but for some reason I don't feel anxious around groups of children! To progress further in my career I have to public speak. I have managed to avoid it up till now and the few times where I've had to speak (for a short period of time) have been awful. I have very visible symptoms as I shake uncontrollably, which also affects my voice. I heart also feels like it's going to burst out of my chest. I even refused to make a speech at my best friends wedding as the anxiety is so bad. I have no accepted a senior position in a new school where I will undoubtedly have to public speak. With me it's not a case of if you just do it you'll be fine. The physical symptoms will surface. They do even when I have to answer a question in front of people so addressing an audience would be unbearable.
My question is what is the best action for me? I am considering paying over 1k for hypnosis for example, it's not money I have but if it changed my life of course it would be worth it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance!

[jessed03]

Hypnosis would be a gamble. A vegas-type gamble. Some people respond really well to it, but some people are almost immune.

As somebody who struggles badly with public speaking myself, the best thing I've found is good old fashioned exposure. (CBT didn't help as it was an instantaneous anxiety.)

Joining a Toastmasters group, or something of a similar nature, will be sure to improve your public speaking, even though it will be a little tough to begin with. The best thing is, you can go often, so you can keep up the habit of speaking. You'll stay loose, so to speak.

Failing that, benzos and beta-blockers can help. They're really effective if you find the right dose. Though, they are just a crutch. Best for occasional speeches.

[Dahila]

Hypnosis only work on people who will let others make the decision. The best hypnotist in Europe tried it on me, not working. He told me that it is something that will not work on me. Jesse is giving you an awesome advice. My daughter had the same problem and she started the program "Toast master" that's the name; they had a group of people and were practicing speeches. She things it helped her a lot.

[jessed03]

Hypnosis only work on people who will let others make the decision. The best hypnotist in Europe tried it on me, not working. He told me that it is something that will not work on me. Jesse is giving you an awesome advice. My daughter had the same problem and she started the program "Toast master" that's the name; they had a group of people and were practicing speeches. She things it helped her a lot.

Yeah, I can't imagine anyone telling you what to do, Dahls. ;)

[Dahila]

Jessed I really wanted to quit smoking and had seen it as an opportunity, but he could not do it. I wondered why? There were like 20 people who looked like they were sleeping but me........... I had quit smoking of course 5 years after the fact .;))

[JohnC]

Hi Teacher, I am exactly the same way. I have called in sick when i have a meeting where i might be asked to talk but i can talk your ear off if its just a few people. If i have a meeting a month away i will start worrying about it 3 weeks away and buy the time it gets here i have already got myself worked into a major anxiety issue. I too have turned down my best friends invite to be best man at his wedding because i could not do the speech that is expected from a best man :( If you ever get on ted talks on youtube there are some good videos to look over but more people fear public speaking than death and i am one of them.
********** Hi Dahlia and jessed03 it's been awhile, hope you are both well and yes i still fight the good fight*******************

[Kuma]

Hi Teacher, I am exactly the same way. I have called in sick when i have a meeting where i might be asked to talk but i can talk your ear off if its just a few people. If i have a meeting a month away i will start worrying about it 3 weeks away and buy the time it gets here i have already got myself worked into a major anxiety issue. I too have turned down my best friends invite to be best man at his wedding because i could not do the speech that is expected from a best man :( If you ever get on ted talks on youtube there are some good videos to look over but more people fear public speaking than death and i am one of them.
********** Hi Dahlia and jessed03 it's been awhile, hope you are both well and yes i still fight the good fight*******************

This just shows what a strange beast anxiety is. I do a lot of public speaking. I have no problem with it at all. Not a bit. But I experience anxiety -- sometimes intense anxiety -- over other things. It is one word -- "anxiety" -- but it certainly manifests itself differently, in different people.

Regarding public speaking, I will say this -- knowing the subject matter REALLY well, and treating it more as a conversation and less as a performance -- is the best advice I can give. But I understand that some people have a mental block of sorts that makes it difficult.