Best Friend is Suicidal and I am intensely scared

[Whatishappening]

Well that title sure is a catch. I only just joined too, so off to a good start, right?

I am feeling incredibly anxious right at this second, so I'll just get to the point!!!

Basically, my best friend is a 14 year old kid (Im a few years older) who has already went through way too much shit in his life.
I won't say too much, but from what happened he now has a lot of mental/personality disorders, a lot of them affect the behaviour negatively too..
He also lives with a shitty family and he is really suicidal. A lot.

We 'only' have an internet friendship, so I can't comfort him all that much. He lives on the other half of the planet from me. We talk almost every day on skype and things like that. I think we've known each other for three+ years??
I am pretty sure he has started to become really emotionally dependent on me. ((Maybe I on him too. He's the only one i really talk to about my problems...))
One time I told him I might have to go to one of those Mental Health Clinic thingies (not in a closed off station though) and he panicked and said he is really scared of me leaving him... That's kinda where I started getting worried
We both consider each other best friends, we tell each other we love each other frequently, i helped him through his break ups and I'm pretty sure I talked him out of suicide at least once... The friends we share tell me I take really good care of him.
They also told me I should..pay close attention to everything he says and try to figure out some other meaning that could be behind it... (erm..creepy?)

But now I always feel weird. I'm scared EVERY DAY that I will come home to a message on skype telling me he will do it and off himself. When there isn't, I'm worrying about when the time will come. I dont know just how many scenarious I have made up so far about it. I have no idea how I will react when the time comes. And I'm pretty sure it will come, at this point, sooner or later. Also I'm still sad about my old DOGS death when I was like 9 even though I never did much with him anyway so how the hell would I react with one of my favorite people in the world?? At this point I sometimes catch myself thinking that I'd just rather get it over with already, which disgusts me

My head feels weird, I'm pretty sure some of this doesn't really make sense/should have been elaborated on, I'll answer questions if there are any, but I'm just gonna start the thread like this...

I do think I should add though that even though I have anxiety, I was usually really happy and warm most of the time. Now I always just feel cold and tired..

[Kuma]

Most countries have suicide prevention organizations that can provide crisis counseling, referrals and other assistance. If you tell us where your friend lives, someone here can probably send you contact information for such an organization in his area. Then you could recommend to your friend that if he is feeling like he is in crisis or needs help, he should call this organization and ask them for help. Usually the people who staff these organizations are quite well trained and able to help. Beyond that, maybe all you can do is be a good, supportive friend and let your friend know that you are there for him/her.

[gypsylee]

Well that title sure is a catch. I only just joined too, so off to a good start, right?

I am feeling incredibly anxious right at this second, so I'll just get to the point!!!

Basically, my best friend is a 14 year old kid (Im a few years older) who has already went through way too much shit in his life.
I won't say too much, but from what happened he now has a lot of mental/personality disorders, a lot of them affect the behaviour negatively too..
He also lives with a shitty family and he is really suicidal. A lot.

We 'only' have an internet friendship, so I can't comfort him all that much. He lives on the other half of the planet from me. We talk almost every day on skype and things like that. I think we've known each other for three+ years??
I am pretty sure he has started to become really emotionally dependent on me. ((Maybe I on him too. He's the only one i really talk to about my problems...))
One time I told him I might have to go to one of those Mental Health Clinic thingies (not in a closed off station though) and he panicked and said he is really scared of me leaving him... That's kinda where I started getting worried
We both consider each other best friends, we tell each other we love each other frequently, i helped him through his break ups and I'm pretty sure I talked him out of suicide at least once... The friends we share tell me I take really good care of him.
They also told me I should..pay close attention to everything he says and try to figure out some other meaning that could be behind it... (erm..creepy?)

But now I always feel weird. I'm scared EVERY DAY that I will come home to a message on skype telling me he will do it and off himself. When there isn't, I'm worrying about when the time will come. I dont know just how many scenarious I have made up so far about it. I have no idea how I will react when the time comes. And I'm pretty sure it will come, at this point, sooner or later. Also I'm still sad about my old DOGS death when I was like 9 even though I never did much with him anyway so how the hell would I react with one of my favorite people in the world?? At this point I sometimes catch myself thinking that I'd just rather get it over with already, which disgusts me

My head feels weird, I'm pretty sure some of this doesn't really make sense/should have been elaborated on, I'll answer questions if there are any, but I'm just gonna start the thread like this...

I do think I should add though that even though I have anxiety, I was usually really happy and warm most of the time. Now I always just feel cold and tired..

I understand how you feel because I get severe anxiety and I've had a few suicidal friends/ex-boyfriends. Now that I'm older (41) I get less anxious and to be honest I think it's a bit unfair of people to put that sort of thing on others. I think referring your friend to a professional organisation is a good idea because you shouldn't really have to deal with it on your own. I hope I don't sound callous - I know you care a lot about your friend - but you have to look after yourself as well and worrying about whether someone is going to kill themself does cause a lot of anxiety.

All the best to you :)
Gypsy x

[PanicCured]

Well that title sure is a catch. I only just joined too, so off to a good start, right?

I am feeling incredibly anxious right at this second, so I'll just get to the point!!!

Basically, my best friend is a 14 year old kid (Im a few years older) who has already went through way too much shit in his life.
I won't say too much, but from what happened he now has a lot of mental/personality disorders, a lot of them affect the behaviour negatively too..
He also lives with a shitty family and he is really suicidal. A lot.

We 'only' have an internet friendship, so I can't comfort him all that much. He lives on the other half of the planet from me. We talk almost every day on skype and things like that. I think we've known each other for three+ years??
I am pretty sure he has started to become really emotionally dependent on me. ((Maybe I on him too. He's the only one i really talk to about my problems...))
One time I told him I might have to go to one of those Mental Health Clinic thingies (not in a closed off station though) and he panicked and said he is really scared of me leaving him... That's kinda where I started getting worried
We both consider each other best friends, we tell each other we love each other frequently, i helped him through his break ups and I'm pretty sure I talked him out of suicide at least once... The friends we share tell me I take really good care of him.
They also told me I should..pay close attention to everything he says and try to figure out some other meaning that could be behind it... (erm..creepy?)

But now I always feel weird. I'm scared EVERY DAY that I will come home to a message on skype telling me he will do it and off himself. When there isn't, I'm worrying about when the time will come. I dont know just how many scenarious I have made up so far about it. I have no idea how I will react when the time comes. And I'm pretty sure it will come, at this point, sooner or later. Also I'm still sad about my old DOGS death when I was like 9 even though I never did much with him anyway so how the hell would I react with one of my favorite people in the world?? At this point I sometimes catch myself thinking that I'd just rather get it over with already, which disgusts me

My head feels weird, I'm pretty sure some of this doesn't really make sense/should have been elaborated on, I'll answer questions if there are any, but I'm just gonna start the thread like this...

I do think I should add though that even though I have anxiety, I was usually really happy and warm most of the time. Now I always just feel cold and tired..

Can you get them to call the Suicide Hotline to start? In the US it is:
1 (800) 273-8255
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Hours: 24 hours, 7 days a week

You can google your country if you are somewhere else.

Also, if they refuse to call, you can call them and have them call your friend.

I had a friend that told me over the phone she swallowed a bunch of pills to kill herself. I hung up the phone and called 911 (emergency number) and very quickly an ambulance came and took her to the hospital. Well, it wasn't long after until she thanked me, and for many years to come her and her parents were grateful of that phone call I made. She ended up doing great after that.