dp2014
01-09-2015, 03:12 PM
So in March14, i had an episode of major stress/anxiety with a tenant from hell. Couldn't sleep, all my senses went into overdrive. Felt panic, went to the docs, who prescribed me some Ambien. Even sent me to the heart clinic as i had all the chest tightening. Then depression hit. Got over that, and well I've sort of got better in certain ways (as in no more depression or physical anxiety symptoms, but got worse in others. The mental side.. Creating new phobia's. Getting OCD on colors ?? (I know WTF !!!). Constantly thinking about my mental condition. Before March, i'd of raised an eyebrow thinking whack job !!! I'm 42 and my life has been pretty good up until now.
The one thing that has remained constant, was the non-stop thinking about my situation. Tenant from hell, got rid of that idiot in Oct14. But my mental condition is FAR FAR from being anywhere that it was before all this happened.
Feel completely disconnected with reality. My vision is a little trippy and my i have convinced myself that my colors / contrasts are all off.. (which i know there not) but there's so many visual reminders that keep me locked in, i feel i'm never going to get over this miserable disorder. It's as if my perception has changed... I've read up on DP/DR, and i will say i do have some dissassociation, but nothing out of body, like those sufferers in the DP/DR forums.
Took it upon myself to get some mental treatment, and went into one of these walk-in mental health clinics. Broke down in tears and explained what i was going thru.. Took my wife as she knows what I'm going thru. She mentally 100%, never had any anxiety issues, good with stress, great with kids. A great mom and wife.. and sticking with me thru all of this. I have no other issues, actually i should be loving life.. Everything other than this damn disorder is in order ! The social worker diagnosed me with PTSD. But i think there's probably a couple of other disorders on top of that.. Maybe I dunno.. I'm no shrink. Either way its all anxiety related....
This all goes away when i'm socializing and that's my one saving grace... only for it to return when i'm back to my daily non-stop thinking about it. So I KNOW i'm curable. I sleep again, for 7 hrs a night, though i do wake 2 or 3 times a night.
Can't get to see the psychiatrist til early Feb, and i'm seeing my GP next Fri for my annual checkup.. I'm almost certain i have no physical conditions, and this is ALL anxiety / mental related.. so i'm just going to ask him, I'm ready for the pills. Which pills do you recommend i should be asking for ?
I've developed a fear of what I'm seeing is not right. Whether it be contrast or colors. I know i'm bringing this on myself, as i'm only adding to them as this all goes on.. Example, i start to torment myself one week in Sept that it looks like the contrast in my vision is turned up, and then boom, i now have a sort of phobia that it is, and am constantly analyzing if it is or not. I know i'm mentally ill. and am seeking the help.
I eat well, work out every day, cycle about 100miles a week. Have a great family support, no abuse / alcohol / drug problem.. Just my mind that's playing non-stop tricks on me.. Even had my eyes tested knowing that the results would come back 20/20 and they did.
So do you think I'm suffering with just PTSD ? even though i didn't exactly see anything trauma related.. Just 100% stressed out over that damn tenant from hell. Some of you guys / girls know more than the docs...
The one thing that has remained constant, was the non-stop thinking about my situation. Tenant from hell, got rid of that idiot in Oct14. But my mental condition is FAR FAR from being anywhere that it was before all this happened.
Feel completely disconnected with reality. My vision is a little trippy and my i have convinced myself that my colors / contrasts are all off.. (which i know there not) but there's so many visual reminders that keep me locked in, i feel i'm never going to get over this miserable disorder. It's as if my perception has changed... I've read up on DP/DR, and i will say i do have some dissassociation, but nothing out of body, like those sufferers in the DP/DR forums.
Took it upon myself to get some mental treatment, and went into one of these walk-in mental health clinics. Broke down in tears and explained what i was going thru.. Took my wife as she knows what I'm going thru. She mentally 100%, never had any anxiety issues, good with stress, great with kids. A great mom and wife.. and sticking with me thru all of this. I have no other issues, actually i should be loving life.. Everything other than this damn disorder is in order ! The social worker diagnosed me with PTSD. But i think there's probably a couple of other disorders on top of that.. Maybe I dunno.. I'm no shrink. Either way its all anxiety related....
This all goes away when i'm socializing and that's my one saving grace... only for it to return when i'm back to my daily non-stop thinking about it. So I KNOW i'm curable. I sleep again, for 7 hrs a night, though i do wake 2 or 3 times a night.
Can't get to see the psychiatrist til early Feb, and i'm seeing my GP next Fri for my annual checkup.. I'm almost certain i have no physical conditions, and this is ALL anxiety / mental related.. so i'm just going to ask him, I'm ready for the pills. Which pills do you recommend i should be asking for ?
I've developed a fear of what I'm seeing is not right. Whether it be contrast or colors. I know i'm bringing this on myself, as i'm only adding to them as this all goes on.. Example, i start to torment myself one week in Sept that it looks like the contrast in my vision is turned up, and then boom, i now have a sort of phobia that it is, and am constantly analyzing if it is or not. I know i'm mentally ill. and am seeking the help.
I eat well, work out every day, cycle about 100miles a week. Have a great family support, no abuse / alcohol / drug problem.. Just my mind that's playing non-stop tricks on me.. Even had my eyes tested knowing that the results would come back 20/20 and they did.
So do you think I'm suffering with just PTSD ? even though i didn't exactly see anything trauma related.. Just 100% stressed out over that damn tenant from hell. Some of you guys / girls know more than the docs...