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Weyoun
01-03-2015, 11:12 AM
Hi Everyone! I know it's been a long time since I posted but the last few months have been a bit of a wild ride. With the help of my doctor, I am now completely Klonopin-free. I tapered down from 3mg a day. I was very nervous going into it because I've heard and read so many horror stories, but after the first 2 weeks I felt much better. I began my taper on December 1st and here are some of the symptoms that I endured on my journey:

-Disrupted sleep. I'd sleep for two hours, wake up for an hour, sleep for two hours, and so on. To this day, I still have some difficulty sleeping through the night but it is getting better each night.

-Cardiac sensations. This is a little weird to explain. Sometimes it would feel like someone was wringing my heart out like a sponge and other times I felt intense heat in my chest even though I wasn't sweating.

-Night sweats. While we're on the topic of sweating, I had some insane night sweats during my initial withdrawal. It was literally like I was a football coach and someone dumped a huge jug of Gatorade on me. Thank God I kept extra bedclothes and pajamas nearby.

-Equilibrium. Sometimes things would tilt either to the left or to the right. If I closed my eyes for a second, the tilting stopped. I also exhibited some difficulty holding onto things.

-Inability to write. I had such trouble trying to write out my Christmas cards this year. My hands kept shaking and I couldn't write properly. I also had difficulty spelling simple names. Writing strings of numbers proved difficult as well.

All in all, I'm proud of myself because I feel like I'm pretty much out of the lion's den and I only missed one day of work during my withdrawal. I know that it's not even close to being over and that I may have PAWS for quite sometime, but I feel much better.

I feel like the rest of my brain has awakened and I'm able to do so much more now. I actually have less anxiety than I did when I was on the Klonopin...if that makes any sense at all. My memory, creativity, and problem-solving abilities have all come back and I no longer feel like I have the onset of dementia.

What's the point of all this rambling? I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you're tired of Klonopin (or any benzo/psych med) and you feel like it's doing more harm than good, then talk to your doctor about discontinuing it. Don't think of it so much as withdrawal but rather your brain's way of "reactivating" itself. It's going to be unpleasant and several times I had to hold back from running to my pill bottle, but it's worth it in the end. Good luck!

Ponder
01-03-2015, 02:40 PM
Congratulations! I'm nearing 3 months off Seroquel/quetiapine. It too has some horrific side effects and I am so glad to be rid of them. Your effort to come off whilst working is both admirable and encouraging from my perspective.

That truly is an amazing feat. Well done to you.

May I ask what strategies you may be using now, if you were taking for anxiety? I can clearly see why you chose to come off them. I find that after long term use of any of Psych Drugs I took, came with most of the side effects listed on line and I ended up pretty much worse.

Best I can do for myself to stay off them is to keep active and eat healthy with maybe some psychotherapy when I can find the right therapists that works with me. (Ringing to stop my appointments today - she makes me worse like that drugs) It can be hard with so many pro drug users among them. I find that the hardest hurdle; especially with most doctors. Very glad to hear a doctor helped you.

Again - Congratulations!

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Welcome to the drug free zone - lol so to speak. Not sure there is such a thing anymore. :)

Weyoun
01-03-2015, 03:27 PM
Thank you so much, Ponder. It wasn't easy to work while going through withdrawal because it was our busiest time of the year. I just took it day by day which is what I'm going to continue to do. I guess my strategy when anxiety-triggering events happen in life is just ask myself: "OK, are we going to find a solution to this and get past it OR are we going to freak out about it, ignore it until it becomes a huge problem, and then do something about it?"

I also feel that now that I'm med-free I actually WANT to do things and look forward to getting things done. If you've ever read the story about Stevie Nicks' horrible experience with Klonopin, that's basically what I went through. Like Stevie, I gained weight and turned into a zombie just trudging through life. The medication just wreaks havoc on your brain. It's a horrible feeling to be 32 years old and leave for work only to drive back home to make sure you've locked the door or brought the dog inside. Or to look at pictures of yourself at a party and have absolutely no memory of being there. I won't miss that feeling at all.