Hypochondriac/self-diagnosing myself and my family

[MidwestGirl]

Hi guys! Brand new here and will try to keep this to the point. I have always suffered from generalized anxiety. My dad has it, as well. I am a senior in nursing school and as much as I love it, it has given me serious hypochondriac tendencies. Most recently, I diagnosed myself with MS. This passed like it usually does but the past few months I have been convinced my mom has early onset Alzheimer's (she's 58) and I can't shake it. I know this is unlikely but as most of you know, unlikely means nothing when you have anxiety. She is the co-owner of a restaurant, so she works more than full time as the baker. She gets up at 5, is there by 6, bakes and cooks all day, goes straight to see my 90 year old borderline alcoholic grandpa for a couple of hours, goes home and cooks dinner, and I think at that point is so beat she can barely function. She also makes sourdough and fairly frequently forgets to go back to her business to cover it after it rises. The other night she thought she laid out 2 packs of steaks but can only find one. She might forget she already told me a story on occasion. I find myself OBSESSIVELY picking apart everything she says and does and attaching myself to the one time she misspoke, or messed up a recipe in the midst of the chaotic restaurant she works at. She doesn't forget familiar names, get lost going to familiar places, etc. But she DOES seem forgetful lately. On one hand, I tell myself that this is NORMAL aging, especially for a woman who is always doing a million things at once, including taking my grandpa to his doctors appointments. She also has A LOT of stress, including just finding out my brothers girlfriend is pregnant. On the other hand, I tell myself I am in nursing school, I have worked with people with Alzheimer's, and maybe I am just noticing the very early symptoms. I once told her my fear and I have now given her a complex and have a lot of guilt about that. Every time she forgets something, she remembers that I told her I think she has dementia. How do I get past this? My SO said I need to have her checked out if it would help, but I can't do that. She is a fully functioning woman and I can't imagine what that would do to our relationship if I demanded she go get a CT scan because I think she has Alzheimer's. I can't make this her issue, it's mine. I want to move past this but I have that nagging feeling that if I move past it she will not get the treatment she needs. I just needed to write this down and vent in a place that truly understands. Thank you all for reading this, and being here.

[NixonRulz]

Self diagnosing is quite easy with an anxiety disorder. Not only do you have Google, but you double your pleasure by being in nursing school where you get to hear yet even more symptoms of what you and your family MUST have after hearing them.

But the hardest thing to do is when you listen to all those symptoms and you start making connections with your body, you can't stop and understand that those symptoms of making the connection is the diagnosis of anxiety. Not what you are trying to connect the symptoms with.

And you are correct that this is your issue but understand that you mean well. You are doing it out of your love for people, not to be a pain in the ass.

Congrats on nearing the finish line of nursing school.

You will come to the understanding of the difference between reality and your thoughts of what you and others MAY have

By the way, I think if your 90 year old grandpa is a borderline alcoholic, perhaps we all should have a few extra drinks each nigh in order to live that long ;)

Be well!

[Chelsea Doak]

I do this same thing with my family and myself! I've had a headache for a week... BOOM, IT'S BRAIN CANCER. I just convinced myself that is not because my headache went away. And even though when I had those thoughts I KNEW I was being irrational but I just couldn't shake the feeling. It was aweful. I've been doing this for about a year.

Then I get my family involved. Right now I'm dead set my boyfriend has esophageal cancer cause his food gets stuck in his esophagus and it makes him puke... this happens every like 3 months.

My brother is gunna have a heart condition cause he works out WAY too much

My step kids have a cough and a stuffy nose, they're gunna die in their sleep because they can't breathe.

My dad is woozy whenever he sees any blood... and I'm talking REALLY woozy. He's gunna see blood, faint while driving, and get in a car wreck.

Google is my worst enemy.

I'm a supervisor at a end of life and memory care facilty. So I see how people can die and what diagnosis they have. Alzheimers is a scary one. No treatment. They won't remember you. The list goes on and on. But you have to remember, like you said, she's a busy woman, she got a lot on her plate and it's so easy to forgot things when your life is gong at 3000 miles per hour. I thought the same thing about my grandma.... but then I just realized, she's just aging and that's completely normal.

It sounds like we are the same people. Lol. Your more than welcome to talk to me so I can help you out of your irrational thoughts.

[NixonRulz]

I do this same thing with my family and myself! I've had a headache for a week... BOOM, IT'S BRAIN CANCER. I just convinced myself that is not because my headache went away. And even though when I had those thoughts I KNEW I was being irrational but I just couldn't shake the feeling. It was aweful. I've been doing this for about a year.

Then I get my family involved. Right now I'm dead set my boyfriend has esophageal cancer cause his food gets stuck in his esophagus and it makes him puke... this happens every like 3 months.

My brother is gunna have a heart condition cause he works out WAY too much

My step kids have a cough and a stuffy nose, they're gunna die in their sleep because they can't breathe.

My dad is woozy whenever he sees any blood... and I'm talking REALLY woozy. He's gunna see blood, faint while driving, and get in a car wreck.

Google is my worst enemy.

I'm a supervisor at a end of life and memory care facilty. So I see how people can die and what diagnosis they have. Alzheimers is a scary one. No treatment. They won't remember you. The list goes on and on. But you have to remember, like you said, she's a busy woman, she got a lot on her plate and it's so easy to forgot things when your life is gong at 3000 miles per hour. I thought the same thing about my grandma.... but then I just realized, she's just aging and that's completely normal.

It sounds like we are the same people. Lol. Your more than welcome to talk to me so I can help you out of your irrational thoughts.

Isn't it just amazing how Google has screwed so many people with anxiety?

Dang!

[Chelsea Doak]

Seriously! I was on a hypochondriac forum and I saw this thing on there that said "stop googling and start living"

As stupid as it sounds it's helped me so much! Haha.

[NixonRulz]

Seriously! I was on a hypochondriac forum and I saw this thing on there that said "stop googling and start living"

As stupid as it sounds it's helped me so much! Haha.

So true!

Right when I hit "search" on Google, I prepare to die! :p

[Chelsea Doak]

Yup... me too!

[Kuroneko77]

Yep im thr same way. I keep thinking I have cancer Dx must stop looking at illnesses and look at languages :3