Anxiety attack, did I do the right thing?

[Ambition]

I have had anxiety, mild agoraphobia and panic attacks for the last few years. One of the few things I enjoyed doing was going swimming on an evening. Ok it was 4 miles drive but a route I was used to and within my comfort zone. Once there I would swim meet people in steam room or jacuzzi and have a sauna :) I use to look forward to my evening swim all day :).

About a month ago I got there and during the swim felt anxious fearing I would have a panic attack with depersonalisation etc :(. I was scared I may not be able to drive home, I was scared I may have to tell a life guard in case I faint or get confused and loose my memory, that would embarrass me. So I promptly left the pool got dressed and headed straight home. Almost home I just felt an immense sense of relief.
But I felt angry with the panic and anxiety and wanted to punish it by not going swimming again. I was just so frustrated. Like doing a painting and making a mistake then then tearing the canvas up. I wanted to punish my anxiety.
Now I'm loosing the confidence to go back swimming, my agoraphobia is getting worse, but in one way feel I'm punishing that near anxiety attack that forced me to hurry home by starving it even though I've sacrificed some thing I really enjoyed :(

Any similar experiences or advice? Did I do the right thing? What can I do?

[KellyMN]

My thought is that you did the right thing for that moment. There are moments where I would absolutly have to leave and there may be moemnts where I would try to touch it out a bit, but whatever you have to do at that moment is OKAY! WIth my current bought of anxiety I have MADE myself continue to come to work, even there have been times where I really didn't want to or think I could. I don't want to fall any deeper and I know that avoiding certain situations will not help my current situation. I am trying to conitnue to live life the way that I should.. try to make healthy choices both mentally and physically. In fact, I just MADE myself eat lunch even though I have zero appetite. I started my meds again yesterday, so my anxiety is even more heightened. It is all I can think about today, which is why I've been on this board so much.. I'm trying to distract from the worry.
If you can try to continue with life as normal and TRY to continue to do the things that you like to do. WIth ANxiety and Panic it is very much about stepping out of your comfort zone and proving to yourself that you can do it. But at the same time it is completely okay to also allow yourself to walk away when you need to.
(OMGOSH, why can't I ever listen to my own advice!)