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1Bluerose68
10-10-2014, 06:24 PM
The 1st one I ate was a plain 1.

The 2nd 1 I ate was yummy plus it had a blueberry drizzle on top.

The 3rd was even yummier than the 1st or the 2nd. It had Lemon Meringue topping.

I ate all 3 of these after I got home from a stressful day of work.

I ate them in the privacy of my car, on top of the hill, in the parking lot of my favorite Park.

But especially because some idiot cut me off in the slow lane to get into the FAST LANE???Go Figure......

Soooooooo I justify my out of control, sugar binge, enticed by stress and anger as OK.

I lost weight over the weekend.

now must workout even harder @ my gym.

I feel REALLY numb , and spacey, and i think my blood sugar level is a tad on the low side. Thats why I must have needed so many , before feeling full, or something?

Now my tummy has an ache, and my mouth is sour from the last cheese cake.

Like, Lemony Snicket Part 2.

And I think I feel Soo anxious that I shall vomit after I get 1/2 way home, at the local Kaiser restroom.

Kaiser has THE best Latrines in my community.

2nd to Kaiser is the Home Depot.

Also, my local University has awesome bathroom stalls.

Well, gotta go.

Love yal.......Ughhhhh me motor boat is soooooo slow today. To much grease in my system me thinkzzzz!!!
Wish me well, I hope no Late Lutial Phase Disorder Delays this month, usually they are!!!

Sincerely,
1Bluerose68

JohnC
10-11-2014, 06:36 AM
Dam i love cheesecake too. I wish i hadn't read this thread because now i WANT some, LOL.

Dahila
10-11-2014, 07:49 AM
I want some too. Cheesecake are so damn expensive to make them, but i have awesome new machine and I have no excuse anymore. Mine is with raisins and fruit and jello on the top:)) John come to Canada and I will make one for you, the huge one:)

JohnC
10-11-2014, 10:13 AM
oh Dahlia thank you that sounds so good and i wish i could come to Canada. I would probably never leave.

Dahila
10-11-2014, 12:41 PM
Yeah it seems that we do not live soo fast:))

em1
10-11-2014, 04:00 PM
Cheesecake is my absolute favourite
Tho i know what you mean about the sugary overload as I did that today to with the boxes for celebrations and heroes,back on my diet tomorrow tho

1Bluerose68
10-11-2014, 04:38 PM
Yey, another "Breakfast Club" member...

em1
10-11-2014, 05:14 PM
Yey, another "Breakfast Club" member...

When you said breakfast club I thought of the film lol

1Bluerose68
10-11-2014, 09:14 PM
Yep, that's the flik I was referring too. I loved it, saw it , during my time in H.S like 4 x.....I spose it became a part of my eating style on days off from totally strict eating habits, and the gym after my 7 to 4 job.....

JohnC
10-12-2014, 06:22 AM
Love that flick myself. :)

Im-Suffering
10-12-2014, 06:46 AM
Yep, that's the flik I was referring too. I loved it, saw it , during my time in H.S like 4 x.....I spose it became a part of my eating style on days off from totally strict eating habits, and the gym after my 7 to 4 job.....

This soul cannot make decisions. The dance done so well is camouflage for the pain both in its daily life and the spin of words on message boards. Projecting the air of self deprecation it will receive no sincere help, which serves to reinforce the protective wall. As you see here, eating three cheesecakes one knows to be foolish, but you are met not with rebuke, just more silliness which finally leads off topic. A derailment. The projections, the lack of seriousness, taking oneself seriously, lack of care or regard for self will eventually lead to a more serious issue that the self then will be forced to face, as it has ignored previous attempts. Illness is an attention grabber, for unresolved issues the identity has not faced.

I behoove you to stand back, and decide. A life without decisions is no life at all. After all you are alive, you did survive, and while you feel dead inside for the past, You must stop reminiscing, recapitulating the burdens and expect things to be better.

Rather than fanciful words, or cake, drown yourself in love, worth, and value. What do you feel when I say that?

You can hear these things, but your ears are truly clogged.

Dahila
10-12-2014, 08:30 AM
Hey IMs we are not on funeral here, some silliness is needed in life too. I do not want to be dead serious, when you are you miss a lot of good things in life :)) have a funny and nice day:)

Im-Suffering
10-12-2014, 09:31 AM
Hey IMs we are not on funeral here, some silliness is needed in life too. I do not want to be dead serious, when you are you miss a lot of good things in life :)) have a funny and nice day:)

Where will you be when these souls face their real crisis away from the front and facade of a message board, not with them in their homes, I suspect. When the shit hits the fan, then what. Every single post of mine has had meaning for the individual to about face before they reach that point. Who listens, especially with all the noisy human chatter. One doesn't need to be overly terrified of the contents of their own mind, when listening to others is terrifying enough. When one eats 3 cheesecakes, what do you get, "oh I like cake", "come ill bake one for you", "wasn't that a movie?". When the cake is not the issue but a symbol of the feelings. Self harm is not only a cut, or a few fisticuffs directed at the body as one of your good friend here acts out, who'll remain nameless.

What mask are they, or you, wearing today is the only question. This soul has specifically dire issues with grief, and letting go...not releasing has consequences on the body, as she knows, but doesn't tell. That's the dirty little secret in the closet. So,where are you, when they cry in silence? You will not see a post for that. You'll be in the garden dealing with your own snakes.

I am not fighting with you, you are the old staple here, it's like your ship, captain. Isn't it?

Dahila
10-12-2014, 09:46 AM
Ims I know that you are right, but , maybe you had never problem with compulsive eating. Eating disorders are difficult to treat and should be treated by specialist. I know this first hand. You should be gentle with people, that all I am asking for. Even if you are right, the way you deliver is kind of hard to take. People here are very sensitive. I can take it no problem, but I am an oldie. :)
I do believe in soul that's right, but my believe is a bit different from yours. You are right, eating three cheesecake is directed to hated body. Yes it is. I think she should go back to her posts and learn from it:)

1Bluerose68
10-12-2014, 12:20 PM
Oh Please! I worked a full day.

I was in need of something sweet.

I saw that these 3 cakes were there, and so I purchased and ate them ALL.

I am aware that now I need to workout more at the gym and restrict cals for awhile to punish myself for a "Temp Loss of Sanity."

However, it's just 3 mini cheese cakes.

Who cares???

Except for My Derriere.

That I shall need to fit back into my wardrobe.

That is my external locus of control over my feeding frenzies.

Butt, I am aware.

Thanks for your deep thoughts too.....

1Bluerose68

1Bluerose68
10-12-2014, 12:41 PM
No, as I have chosen a life of meditative Isolation when Not around the buzzing energies of life at work.

My time Not at work is My time.

I have house work to catch up on.

I have a gym to work out at.

I have a cat to talk to and a litter box full of cat logs to change.

I have a glorified old shelter to reside in until I am older.

Later I may die of loneliness, boredom, or pain, or I may wish to dwell in an apartment for Seniors.

But for now I am enjoying My Isolation.

This I am entitled to w/o blackmail threats of "Forced Sales of my place of dwelling."

Though when I am at home I am still at work.

It's like The Never Ending Story of chores and chronic neck and mid back pain.

I have no fancy surgeries to bragg of.

I must grin and bear this truly achy old neck, back and new arm pain in my elbow.

Although, i purport to play no fancy game of tennis, except in my head.

I dread to say the least for me.

I wear these 1/2 inch thick Coca-Cola glasses, and ironically I See.

I saw Enough!!!

Sincerely,
1Bluerose68

1Bluerose68
10-12-2014, 12:49 PM
Where will you be when these souls face their real crisis away from the front and facade of a message board, not with them in their homes, I suspect. When the shit hits the fan, then what. Every single post of mine has had meaning for the individual to about face before they reach that point. Who listens, especially with all the noisy human chatter. One doesn't need to be overly terrified of the contents of their own mind, when listening to others is terrifying enough. When one eats 3 cheesecakes, what do you get, "oh I like cake", "come ill bake one for you", "wasn't that a movie?". When the cake is not the issue but a symbol of the feelings. Self harm is not only a cut, or a few fisticuffs directed at the body as one of your good friend here acts out, who'll remain nameless.

What mask are they, or you, wearing today is the only question. This soul has specifically dire issues with grief, and letting go...not releasing has consequences on the body, as she knows, but doesn't tell. That's the dirty little secret in the closet. So,where are you, when they cry in silence? You will not see a post for that. You'll be in the garden dealing with your own snakes.

I am not fighting with you, you are the old staple here, it's like your ship, captain. Isn't it?

"I to the 2nd power, so far???" Is my response formally to you my friend, Mr. Imsuffering.