Understanding your fears : The origins of your anxiety

[Im-Suffering]

Repost from another thread, but deserves its own:


It would help all anxiety sufferers to understand that the origins of their anxiety have been forgotten. (Or cleverly hidden). Let's expand that thought.

Anxiety, as an illness, is always the inability to solve your mental or psychological problems in the correct manner. Unsolved the energies become focused on maintaining the symptoms rather than a solution to the original problem, which in most cases becomes hidden over time.

For example, you have problems in life, relationship, money, health, profession, and so forth. You have uncomfortable feelings regarding these matters. They begin to have secondary implications, or offshoots. You may become bored, lifeless, angry, you don't eat well, irritable, and so forth.

The indecision and the acceptance to sit in these normal life issues, rather than solve them as they come up, (with a solution in your best interests), turns to doubt. Exaggerating the original problem, but also distorting it beyond recognition where the focus then becomes the current 'symptoms'. Thus the equation :

Indecision > doubt > worry > fear > physiological symptoms representing repressed emotions and unresolved issues which now that time has passed have been forgotten, in lieu of the symptoms and an acceptance of "this is the way it is"

Thus your life is built around this new reality of illness where all beliefs feed the expectations.

Now it is a mental 'illness' first and foremost as most of you wind up with a clean bill of physical health you see. After multiple ER and medical checkups. That is a common overlooked characteristic of anxiety, for the most part, you are healthy, period.

So the way home is psychological. The answer to why you have anxiety is within the word indecision. Ask yourself in a locked room, "why am I indecisive" "why am I listless in forming my own life according to how I wish it to be". You will find many answers, if you are honest and allow the pain and hurts to surface. Unlock the room only when you find your answers, be determined, decide.

Upon realization you can then begin to change your beliefs consciously, making decisions and solving problems effectively. Give it time, but keep on and there will be relief from the 'illness'.

From the dictionary for your self analysis remembering fear is an offshoot of indecision:


The act or process of deciding; determination, as of a question or doubt, by making a judgment

The act of or need for making up one's mind

Something that is decided; resolution

The quality of being decided; firmness

You must indeed posess these qualities in your decisions: determination, firmness, and resolution. Backed by the power of expectation (what you believe), and finally persistence. This is the magic formula and when working in harmony, produce so called, miracles..

Lastly, under carefull self analysis most will find they lack decision power for fear of criticism. Or loss, or you were simply told as a child your decisions were wrong, period. The list goes on and is quite personal.

End of post

[Ankhsious]

Good post. I would add that many turn to workoholism (whether in career or relationships or whatever) to mask the pain with pride and even arrogance. This feels good for a while but, as you say, leads to boredom (you need new high scores). In reality, arrogance is just another form of fear and you have fed it rather than confronting it.

[Joe.]

Repost from another thread, but deserves its own:

It would help all anxiety sufferers to understand that the origins of their anxiety have been forgotten. (Or cleverly hidden). Let's expand that thought.

Anxiety, as an illness, is always the inability to solve your mental or psychological problems in the correct manner. Unsolved the energies become focused on maintaining the symptoms rather than a solution to the original problem, which in most cases becomes hidden over time.

For example, you have problems in life, relationship, money, health, profession, and so forth. You have uncomfortable feelings regarding these matters. They begin to have secondary implications, or offshoots. You may become bored, lifeless, angry, you don't eat well, irritable, and so forth.

The indecision and the acceptance to sit in these normal life issues, rather than solve them as they come up, (with a solution in your best interests), turns to doubt. Exaggerating the original problem, but also distorting it beyond recognition where the focus then becomes the current 'symptoms'. Thus the equation :

Indecision > doubt > worry > fear > physiological symptoms representing repressed emotions and unresolved issues which now that time has passed have been forgotten, in lieu of the symptoms and an acceptance of "this is the way it is"

Thus your life is built around this new reality of illness where all beliefs feed the expectations.

Now it is a mental 'illness' first and foremost as most of you wind up with a clean bill of physical health you see. After multiple ER and medical checkups. That is a common overlooked characteristic of anxiety, for the most part, you are healthy, period.

So the way home is psychological. The answer to why you have anxiety is within the word indecision. Ask yourself in a locked room, "why am I indecisive" "why am I listless in forming my own life according to how I wish it to be". You will find many answers, if you are honest and allow the pain and hurts to surface. Unlock the room only when you find your answers, be determined, decide.

Upon realization you can then begin to change your beliefs consciously, making decisions and solving problems effectively. Give it time, but keep on and there will be relief from the 'illness'.

From the dictionary for your self analysis remembering fear is an offshoot of indecision:

The act or process of deciding; determination, as of a question or doubt, by making a judgment

The act of or need for making up one's mind

Something that is decided; resolution

The quality of being decided; firmness

Lastly, under carefully self analysis most will find they lack decision power for fear of criticism. Or loss, or you were simply told as a child your decisions were wrong, period. The list goes on and is quite personal.

End of post

Excellent.

[Xerosnake90]

Invaluable advice in the world of healing. As I progress each day and come to the surface of my expectations I more clearly see my path. I've decided to pursue psychology, schooling and a life path. Something I've avoided my entire life and pushed away with "it's not affordable" or whatever else to excuse my desires. I found myself taking the right steps. Now I see myself as DOING what I seek to do, not just moving towards it.

I want to thank you again, suffering. I will continue to help the people of this forum and the eyes of the many that wander. Until my journey to reach people can become my dedication through work. That's what I will give back for all I've received.

[starsky100]

Good post. I would add that many turn to workoholism (whether in career or relationships or whatever) to mask the pain with pride and even arrogance. This feels good for a while but, as you say, leads to boredom (you need new high scores). In reality, arrogance is just another form of fear and you have fed it rather than confronting it.

Couldnt agree more Ankhsious, this is exactly what i have been doing for years but its like a bottomless pit, you can throw everything at it but its never full. I too used to mask my axiety with a false arrogance. it worked for years until i had a full blown panic attack while on the phone to my boss. I also found that the problem with hiding it with arrogance or false confidence is it becomes even more difficult to talk to anyone about it.

[Ankhsious]

Starsky, thank you for sharing and being honest. Knowing it is 80% of the battle. The other 20% is finding healing self love and seeking out help and support from dear friends. This requires a shift that is easy for you to do, but hard for your well trained ego wolf to accept.

I'm in the midst of this 'dark night of the soul' and it's fooking hard!

I listened to Louise Hay's 10 ways to love yourself yesterday. I am trying to put that stuff to work. I highly recommend.

One of the key ones was something to the effect of "nothing you ever did was wrong, you nourished yourself the best way you knew how. do not ever blame yourself for the past but gently and lovingly move yourself to a more evolved strategy for nourishment, and be patient!"

[starsky100]

I'm sorry to here that Ankhsious. After the full blown panic attack (which i knew was just a matter of time the way things were building) i went to the docs and he gave me a presctiption for Citalopram. I have been very against taking medication for years but after the panic attack and not knowing if/when i was going to have another one took things to a whole new level so i felt had to do something. After researching side effects etc i took the plunge last week and have been quite amazed so far. if nothing else it has given me the first moment of clarity i can remember and as a result can see first hand how irrational my thoughts have been. As much as I told myself this over the years i could never bring myself to believe it. Fingers crossed it continues to help.

i just joined the site today and already finding it very helpful. Thanks for the recomendation, i'll definitely look out for Louise Hay.

[Ankhsious]

I feel for you. I've had full blown panic attacks 6 years ago and DID use medication to bring myself back under control. Now that depression/anxiety has resurfaced I am trying very hard to avoid going back on medication. It's tough but my head is above water so far :-)

[Two One]

What a great post. This really gave me some perspective.

[jessed03]

I bet you were an awesome student IS. Bold, underline, italics.

Can't take away from the post though. You get it.

[Exactice]

Atta boy Im -Suffering Great post!!!!!!!!

[Autumn Hazel Rain]

This is a great post and exactly what I need to read right now. My anxiety is through the roof as of late, after getting fired from my job. I can usually snap out of it, but now it seems my body is going hay wire! I feel like I need an escape from my mind, or an off switch. Even my own remedies are not working so well with the anxiety. How can one heal? At least before I got fired, I was able to control my anxiety and it wasn't all day and all night. Sleepless in Milwaukee.....

[Im-Suffering]

Remembering, a lazy indecisive mind is open, or susceptible to all manner of critique from both self and others, and stray thoughts which if he is not strong in character, will power, he is fair game and open to outside influence. Haphazard in nature he will stray with the wind, but on a calm day he will be lost, unable to rely on his own devices, to steer the ship.

If man has the power to control one thing, it is his thinking.

Now, while such a man who is in charge of his faculties might miss sleep as well (note to the post above or anyone with sleep troubles), for this man it will be due to excitement and passion, rather than doubt and worry. Both acting differently upon the body, you see. Both with their own set of symptoms. Only one is extremely pleasurable.

It pleases me that some of you are reading this thread.

[Autumn Hazel Rain]

i feel i have lost the power over my thinking and my body. its time for new and drastic changes. aside from this, I enjoy your poetic advice.
Remembering, a lazy indecisive mind is open, or susceptible to all manner of critique from both self and others, and stray thoughts which if he is not strong in character, will power, he is fair game and open to outside influence. Haphazard in nature he will stray with the wind, but on a calm day he will be lost, unable to rely on his own devices, to steer the ship.

If man has the power to control one thing, it is his thinking.

Now, while such a man who is in charge of his faculties might miss sleep as well (note to the post above or anyone with sleep troubles), for this man it will be due to excitement and passion, rather than doubt and worry. Both acting differently upon the body, you see. Both with their own set of symptoms. Only one is extremely pleasurable.

It pleases me that some of you are reading this thread.