My life is falling apart ... can someone please help me!? I feel all alone in this..

[mattmedi93]

Hello everyone ... I beg of you , if you can take your time and read about my problems and give me some advice I will be for ever grateful.
Short history : I failed college In my country , mostly because I was in love with a girl and spent my time with her and because it was one of the worst colleges in my city and It was a waste of time , didn't even have a chance to get a job with the degree from them. After 2 years and the separation from that girl I've decided to go study abroad what I wanted and for the first time in my life I felt amazing , I was going to get a second chance to start all over again and not screw things up . I couldn't wait for the time to pass faster so that I can get there and start my life the way I've always wanted to be , with my priorities set straight.
But sadly , one month and a half ago it all started . I was at a barbecue with my friends and after some time tending the fire I sat down and I started feeling odd . Couldn't explain what was wrong . It felt like something snapped inside me and started to detach myself from the conversations and everything . I figured I was tired and decided to call a cab . When I got home I was desperate . I thought I was going to pass out any moment . (My idea of safety is at home since my parents are doctors , and damn good ones ) They took my blood pressure and it was fine and told me I'm just having an anxiety attack. I said ok , ok... went to bed and fell asleep .
The next following days it got worse. Every time I'd go out I had a strange feeling ... I don't know how to describe it , it feels like walking on rubber , like my brain was bouncing up and down in my skull . I even started to have a strange sort of headache , it felt like a slight tension / pressure on the back of my head and right on the middle of the nose (where the bone starts) and a feeling of dizziness , not visually like when you are drunk , but a feeling like I'm going to drop on my back. I went to an eye doctor and gave me some glasses for reading and staying at the computer . He said it might be because my eyes are tired . Wore them . Nothing. Went to do my blood tests . Everything came back perfectly , thyroid , aids , everything was normal.
One night my heart was pounding and I decided to take my blood pressure . When that device stopped that pumping I felt like my heart stopped and a sudden chill grabbed me and started to feel like I was passing out . In that moment I screamed thinking that I'm going to die right there . I was rushed by my parents to the er and after a ekg they said I was only scared and that I should take a little magnesium. Since then , my health phobia skyrocketed and my physical symptoms got only worse , to the point that I can't leave my house without my parents , staying home alone without the constant terror that my heart is going to stop and nobody would be there to save me.
My father told me that it's because of the fear of leaving home and nothing is wrong with me . But I keep explaining to him ( Dad , my physical symptoms are there all the time and I am not anxious about leaving , My panic attacks on the other hand start when the symptoms get to a peak and they freak me out ) I am not scared about the departure , I am scared that I am going to die before I get there . He dismisses me every time saying that I'm fine and it's in my head.
Went to a psychiatrist and he told me to ignore the sensations because it creates a cycle and gave me anxiar. My new therapist said the same , try to relax . And I keep telling everyone : How can I relax and ignore those horrible feelings ? what person that is sane and feels an excruciating pain in the chest , numbness in the arm not consider if it's a heart attack? How am I supposed do just dismiss these physical symptoms?! I am not anxious , I don't feel butterflies in my stomach , I am not worried about living on my own there .I just want this horrible torment to end .
I went to a cardiologist and said that I only have a mild respiratory arithmia , and a doctor friend of my parent's gave me some iron/magnezium and calcium telling them to remember that they can be out of ballance even if my blood tests are fine. But I still don't feel and different.
My symptoms are the following : Heart pounding , heart palpitations , when I lie down to fall asleep feels like my heart is stopping and I jump back up , again blood pressure fine. Feeling dizzy , feeling like I"m on a boat , headaches , chest pains , stomach pains , lump in throat , lump in stomach , colon near anus feels like it has a heartbeat , feeling all my organs down from my ribcage have a hearbeat , feeling that I will pass out , hard time breathing , palms sweating , recently developed restless leg syndrome and because of that I think I have a strange feeling in my guts and throat , like a vibration numbness , just like it feels when u use a vibration massage thing for some time then turn it off and you have that remaining tingling . These symptoms are random every day but CONSTANT
I don't know what to think anymore , I want to trust my parents and say it's only anxiety but I can see clearly that my father is too subjective about the whole departure thing . He constantly dismisses me in anger and says it's all a lie and a trick that I play because actually I don't want to leave and work and study , AND IT's not TRUE!! That is exactly what I want to do . and my therapist doesn't really help me by telling me how to act , I've found some relief in talking to her and my last two sessions where mostly chats.
As I said everything came back normal . Except an ear doctor said that I have a minor otitis and I followed my treatment but feel no difference .
Please everyone tell me your opinions . Am I suffering from anxiety , or from something physical and my anxiety is triggered because of the sympoms ? I mean I first got the feelings not the worried state. It's started to affect me emotionally , my father nearly had a meltdown today and wanted to beat me because out of my desperation I yelled at them and I feel horrible and they just watch tv shows and whenever I tell them that I feel bad they barely react , they just say ''aha'' or tell me to go away and leave them alone because I'm driving them crazy. For the first time in 13 years I cried today, I feel so hopeless, and alone . Since I'm not a student anymore for 2 months I don't have ensurance so I can't go to the doctor by myself and my parents won't take me anymore . The last thing I'm going to do is visit the top psychiatric in our country (my father's college buddy) who I admit treated my grandfathers , he is the real deal. But my dad made sure to tell him first that I"m perfectly fine . I'm just scared that this attitude of his might overlook something , I know he loves me and wants to act harsh with me so that I man up and do my duty , but he can't seem to understand that I can't just think away these symptoms .And this whole war between us is destroying me . What do you think about me ? Do I have anxiety or should I continue fighting my parents and seek more answers from doctors?

[JohnC]

hi mattmedi93, Trust your parents my friend. Every thing that you wrote spells out anxiety. Stress and the mind and going off to school for your second chance etc, etc. You may not think that that trip is bothering you but it might just be. Take a look at some of the pass threads in this forum and see if they do not compare to yours. All that stuff feels real, i kknow. I have driven myself to the ER twice. I have been suffering fro over 30 years with it. Your parents are doctors and i am sure that they would do anything for you if they thought there was a medical issue going on. You will start to get some relif when you realize that its your mind ( which is very powerful ) and figure out how to tell yourself that it is just your mind. Good luck and do take a look around. I will be around as well. Peace
That last little bit about trying to tell yourself its in your mind is a tough one. I still do not quite have that figured out to the point of being " cured "

[snowberry]

Sounds like textbook anxiety.

You've had all the tests, which is the place to start, and they've come back normal. There's a thread at the top of this forum that lists many of the symptoms of anxiety, and everything you've described is on that list.

The problem is that many people see it as 'just' anxiety, and can't understand how such awful physical symptoms can manifest because of 'how they feel'. This is why a lot of people can't accept the diagnosis.

Another thing to remember is that anxiety symptoms don't only strike when we're feeling anxious. There are many times where I've felt calm mentally but suddenly my arms go numb, or begin to buzz, or my body comes over all weak.

Sometimes the symptoms change, too. That happened to me recently and I had to talk about it on here because it's so frustrating when you get used to a set of symptoms and think you can recover and get on with your life, only to be faced with a new set. Anxiety is pretty horrible.

But it's harmless, hon. It's scary and maddening but it won't hurt you and these heart palpitations and chest pains are part of the anxiety state, so please don't let them keep you from going outside. Your parents are doctors, and they are not worried, nor are the other medical professionals you've been to. Please, please trust their judgement and accept that you are not seriously ill. Please find the strength to go on your study trip - don't let anxiety rule your life like it has so many others. There are many things that you can try to help you, such as meditation, yoga, cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT)...books by Dr Claire Weekes should be on amazon and her books explain anxiety and how it works very well. But please read the list of symptoms in this forum to put your mind at rest.

[Xerosnake90]

Hey Matt!

You've had quite a journey, it's truly frustrating how powerful anxiety can be when it first takes hold. As mentioned above the physical symptoms are numerous and can change constantly, they can attach themselves to an event and happen. Some personal advice, don't tell yourself "this tingling happens when I feel like this" because your brain will now associate the two and it will cause that sensation to happen. When it comes to physical symptoms you need to ignore them, they absolutely are caused by your anxiety. These sensations can even be extremely painful, but once you stop focusing on it those symptoms will just seem to fade away.

Your fear is what causes your symptoms to thrive. It's integral to understand that your mind is the cause here, not the symptoms. If you went to the doctor with a broken leg and said "no, I don't want to fix the broken bone just give me medication for the pain". That is the equivalent of having anxiety and asking for pills to stop the symptoms. You need to fix the bone, which is the brain in this case.

So how do you fix it? You need to work on changing the things that you want in your life. Your brain is raised by how you learn and will make new ideas or actions hard because they're unnatural. Understand what you want for yourself and go through with it without fear. Be what you want to be, as hard as it is. 30 days is about what it takes to change. Stick out your new ideas for that long and you can make positive change to beat this. You can be back to the way you were or even better!

[mattmedi93]

Thanks for the advice everyone! Last night I really felt fine after reading your messages and managed to fall asleep quite fast ( thing I haven't been able to do in some time) and most of today was fine . I met some friends at the mall and there it hit me . Felt like the ground moved beneath my feet and I nearly collapsed . I checked my pulse , it was fine , blood pressure seamed fine and I struggled through it trying to ignore all wooziness and that stupid feeling you have when you feel like you aren't there in the present . Now after a few hours I'm starting to feel better . I took a valerian pill for a hopefully good night .
It's just so strange when only physical symptoms hit you... I's like trying to fight the discomfort itself rather than the worries and emotions

[Two One]

I know exactly what you're going through. I've slowly watched my life implode and fall apart since I've graduated high school. I honestly felt like all I could do was stand by hopelessly and watch. But I just started therapy this past Friday. I honestly think she can fix me. But, trust me you are not alone. Not a lot of people fully understand how much mental anguish can affect our lives. Do your best to stay strong and hang in there, I know how hard it is to convince yourself that all of those awful physical symptoms are caused by your mind and nothing else. If it was so easy, anxiety wouldn't be such a difficult thing to deal with it. But unfortunately it is. There are more people than you think out there that feel exactly the same way you do. I'm one of those people. There have been so many times where the physical symptoms are just far too debilitating, I felt alone, and I contemplated suicide on more than a few occasions. The most important thing to remember is that you can make it through this. I know it may not seem like it at the moment, but you can. Hang in there. If you need someone to talk to don't hesitate to shoot me a message. I'm a 19 year old guy in college with severe anxiety. I know the feeling.

[KillAnxiety]

what you are going through is anxiety attack, I had same symptoms that you described above. I went to emergency three times and finally got heart monitor that gave me even super duper anxiety attack. I will cut thing short and try explain how to overcome without medication. Rule-1: Dont expect immediate recovery, you have reached to this stage in slow progress but you never realized it. Getting out is also slow and steady progress. it is like 9876543210-1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8. Rule-2: Accept all fears, even fear of Death. Accept that you will die, everyone dies one day I am going to be faster. It is OK. By Accepting all fears you will start neutralizing bad chain of thoughts. Dont push thoughts that How can this happen to me, if you fight it will be back with more power. Rule-3: Expect improvement 1% a day or even less. Believe that you will be like this for next year. Rule-4- Ignore any weird sensation in body (Believe me I have gone through whole list of symptoms, I have gone Doctor after three emergency visit and he said not to come to see him again, take Prescription medication(Valerian) for anxiety which I never took it). Rule-5 - Dont research on internet Rule-6 dont start breathing exercise or Yoga (it works when you are somewhat better, for me it trigger more anxiety Rule-7 Exercise but not cardio, Lift weight and see if you can gain any muscle.. Good luck

[Tifanie Ann Brummitt]

Hello everyone ... I beg of you , if you can take your time and read about my problems and give me some advice I will be for ever grateful.
Short history : I failed college In my country , mostly because I was in love with a girl and spent my time with her and because it was one of the worst colleges in my city and It was a waste of time , didn't even have a chance to get a job with the degree from them. After 2 years and the separation from that girl I've decided to go study abroad what I wanted and for the first time in my life I felt amazing , I was going to get a second chance to start all over again and not screw things up . I couldn't wait for the time to pass faster so that I can get there and start my life the way I've always wanted to be , with my priorities set straight.
But sadly , one month and a half ago it all started . I was at a barbecue with my friends and after some time tending the fire I sat down and I started feeling odd . Couldn't explain what was wrong . It felt like something snapped inside me and started to detach myself from the conversations and everything . I figured I was tired and decided to call a cab . When I got home I was desperate . I thought I was going to pass out any moment . (My idea of safety is at home since my parents are doctors , and damn good ones ) They took my blood pressure and it was fine and told me I'm just having an anxiety attack. I said ok , ok... went to bed and fell asleep .
The next following days it got worse. Every time I'd go out I had a strange feeling ... I don't know how to describe it , it feels like walking on rubber , like my brain was bouncing up and down in my skull . I even started to have a strange sort of headache , it felt like a slight tension / pressure on the back of my head and right on the middle of the nose (where the bone starts) and a feeling of dizziness , not visually like when you are drunk , but a feeling like I'm going to drop on my back. I went to an eye doctor and gave me some glasses for reading and staying at the computer . He said it might be because my eyes are tired . Wore them . Nothing. Went to do my blood tests . Everything came back perfectly , thyroid , aids , everything was normal.
One night my heart was pounding and I decided to take my blood pressure . When that device stopped that pumping I felt like my heart stopped and a sudden chill grabbed me and started to feel like I was passing out . In that moment I screamed thinking that I'm going to die right there . I was rushed by my parents to the er and after a ekg they said I was only scared and that I should take a little magnesium. Since then , my health phobia skyrocketed and my physical symptoms got only worse , to the point that I can't leave my house without my parents , staying home alone without the constant terror that my heart is going to stop and nobody would be there to save me.
My father told me that it's because of the fear of leaving home and nothing is wrong with me . But I keep explaining to him ( Dad , my physical symptoms are there all the time and I am not anxious about leaving , My panic attacks on the other hand start when the symptoms get to a peak and they freak me out ) I am not scared about the departure , I am scared that I am going to die before I get there . He dismisses me every time saying that I'm fine and it's in my head.
Went to a psychiatrist and he told me to ignore the sensations because it creates a cycle and gave me anxiar. My new therapist said the same , try to relax . And I keep telling everyone : How can I relax and ignore those horrible feelings ? what person that is sane and feels an excruciating pain in the chest , numbness in the arm not consider if it's a heart attack? How am I supposed do just dismiss these physical symptoms?! I am not anxious , I don't feel butterflies in my stomach , I am not worried about living on my own there .I just want this horrible torment to end .
I went to a cardiologist and said that I only have a mild respiratory arithmia , and a doctor friend of my parent's gave me some iron/magnezium and calcium telling them to remember that they can be out of ballance even if my blood tests are fine. But I still don't feel and different.
My symptoms are the following : Heart pounding , heart palpitations , when I lie down to fall asleep feels like my heart is stopping and I jump back up , again blood pressure fine. Feeling dizzy , feeling like I"m on a boat , headaches , chest pains , stomach pains , lump in throat , lump in stomach , colon near anus feels like it has a heartbeat , feeling all my organs down from my ribcage have a hearbeat , feeling that I will pass out , hard time breathing , palms sweating , recently developed restless leg syndrome and because of that I think I have a strange feeling in my guts and throat , like a vibration numbness , just like it feels when u use a vibration massage thing for some time then turn it off and you have that remaining tingling . These symptoms are random every day but CONSTANT
I don't know what to think anymore , I want to trust my parents and say it's only anxiety but I can see clearly that my father is too subjective about the whole departure thing . He constantly dismisses me in anger and says it's all a lie and a trick that I play because actually I don't want to leave and work and study , AND IT's not TRUE!! That is exactly what I want to do . and my therapist doesn't really help me by telling me how to act , I've found some relief in talking to her and my last two sessions where mostly chats.
As I said everything came back normal . Except an ear doctor said that I have a minor otitis and I followed my treatment but feel no difference .
Please everyone tell me your opinions . Am I suffering from anxiety , or from something physical and my anxiety is triggered because of the sympoms ? I mean I first got the feelings not the worried state. It's started to affect me emotionally , my father nearly had a meltdown today and wanted to beat me because out of my desperation I yelled at them and I feel horrible and they just watch tv shows and whenever I tell them that I feel bad they barely react , they just say ''aha'' or tell me to go away and leave them alone because I'm driving them crazy. For the first time in 13 years I cried today, I feel so hopeless, and alone . Since I'm not a student anymore for 2 months I don't have ensurance so I can't go to the doctor by myself and my parents won't take me anymore . The last thing I'm going to do is visit the top psychiatric in our country (my father's college buddy) who I admit treated my grandfathers , he is the real deal. But my dad made sure to tell him first that I"m perfectly fine . I'm just scared that this attitude of his might overlook something , I know he loves me and wants to act harsh with me so that I man up and do my duty , but he can't seem to understand that I can't just think away these symptoms .And this whole war between us is destroying me . What do you think about me ? Do I have anxiety or should I continue fighting my parents and seek more answers from doctors?

I'm sorry you're going through this, I am too. Reading these forums tonight is the only sanity I have. I know I have anxiety but I feel like my problems( PAC'S, heart palpitations) are causing me unbearable anxiety. Maybe it's the opposite. I too go through episodes where my body goes wack. I feel faint and dizzy. It's escalated to tight chest, to numb arm, to waves of heat through me, heavy legs, heavy body, extreme fatigue. That happens without my permission! Then there's the anxiety I get from worrying about a palp, or a sudden strange feeling, etc. Either there's something wrong with me, or I have a panic disorder causing random episodes. Anything to do with medical scares the crap out off me. Which is strange because I've always been interested in medical with no problem, if anything low self esteem and social anxiety held me back. But now I'm riddled with fear, exhausted, and trying to hold on, wishing for my former self to return. My insurance has changed so I'll be seeing a new doc, New cardiologist, and thinking of changing my counselor. God bless us all.

[Tifanie Ann Brummitt]

I'm sorry you're going through this, I am too. Reading these forums tonight is the only sanity I have. I know I have anxiety but I feel like my problems( PAC'S, heart palpitations) are causing me unbearable anxiety. Maybe it's the opposite. I too go through episodes where my body goes wack. I feel faint and dizzy. It's escalated to tight chest, to numb arm, to waves of heat through me, heavy legs, heavy body, extreme fatigue. That happens without my permission! Then there's the anxiety I get from worrying about a palp, or a sudden strange feeling, etc. Either there's something wrong with me, or I have a panic disorder causing random episodes. Anything to do with medical scares the crap out off me. Which is strange because I've always been interested in medical with no problem, if anything low self esteem and social anxiety held me back. But now I'm riddled with fear, exhausted, and trying to hold on, wishing for my former self to return. My insurance has changed so I'll be seeing a new doc, New cardiologist, and thinking of changing my counselor. God bless us all.

I also fear of my heart stopping. Suddenly there's a calm, which actually makes me check my pulse in my neck, it comforts me. If it were stopping the halter monitor would have picked that up, so try not to worry about it stopping. I have had it race out of no where, palpitate, mess up, beat one huge beat out of no where, but I'm still here. I actually have a hard time sleeping because when I start to fall asleep I feel like I'm dying, slipping away. I also have RLS. Sometimes my whole body jolts me awake, or a heart palp awakes me. Anxiety is definitely a disease that tries to take over everything. I know they tell you to face your fear and the anxiety will eventually lessen, but in my case how to I stop anxiety from heart palps? It's not like I can control them, so I ping pong between doing better to a complete mess and I'm afraid it will never go away

[KillAnxiety]

I also fear of my heart stopping. Suddenly there's a calm, which actually makes me check my pulse in my neck, it comforts me. If it were stopping the halter monitor would have picked that up, so try not to worry about it stopping. I have had it race out of no where, palpitate, mess up, beat one huge beat out of no where, but I'm still here. I actually have a hard time sleeping because when I start to fall asleep I feel like I'm dying, slipping away. I also have RLS. Sometimes my whole body jolts me awake, or a heart palp awakes me. Anxiety is definitely a disease that tries to take over everything. I know they tell you to face your fear and the anxiety will eventually lessen, but in my case how to I stop anxiety from heart palps? It's not like I can control them, so I ping pong between doing better to a complete mess and I'm afraid it will never go away

That is what happens in anxiety, My first visit to emergency was just mild shortness of breath after I exercised and I thought let me checkout that nothing is wrong and went to Emergency and Doctors found nothing wrong. I came back happy. Second Visit to emergency was some tightness in Chest and all result came back fine again. At that point, I got into anxiety vicious circle, started thinking more and more. Researching internet like crazy. I was sitting and just casually listening to my pulse on my left hand and all of sudden I noticed I skipped heart pulse. I freaked out, immediately went to emergency and they did notice couple heart beat skip in one hour of monitoring. They said to followup with your PCP, I went to PCP and she gave heart monitor for a month. Now, at this point I could not sleep at all, all the time I was checking my heart pulse, thinking that it will stop and I m going to die. Every time I go to sleep, I keep hearing my heart pounding, no matter how hard I try I cannot take my focus away, exhausted and barely sleeping couple hours. Now, chest pain seems to be everywhere left side, right side and sometimes getting electric shock kind of sensation. Tried lot of breathing techniques, super cold shower, nothing worked. As you mentioned ping pong between better and mess. Next was stress test that came back fine. Visited Doctor one more time after all this and he insulted me, and said not to come back again (he told you have anxiety )until this point I was in denial that I could have anxiety.

Now, back to work with dizziness all the times, high blood pressure and heart pounding all the time and no way to stop it but to adjust with it. Tired of researching internet I started exercise, taking heart bit upto level (140 beat/minute) that started building confidence that my heart can take pressure and works fine and does not fall apart. From that point recovery started but it was just little bit every day. Today, after three years I am completely anxiety free, looking back I see how our own mind gets out of control and shows things that are not real. The trick works is to accept anything weird happens to you, and tell yourself this is how it supposed to be, tell yourself I don't care I don't care about this stupid sensation at all. My eyes are open and I can still move. Think that heart is telling you by pounding hey you are still alive. All is good.

I guarantee you this will go away but it takes time, don't go nuts and don't try to match weird symptoms with others (Cancer, heart, anything etc...), all it does make thing worse. whenever you come out of this anxiety you will be much stronger person than before.

[danielJ]

Hey mate, you're not alone, I'm going through the same. I imagine the only thing that would relax me is be with a person of severe anxiety and live in pain together <3

[struggling1234]

Hello everyone ... I beg of you , if you can take your time and read about my problems and give me some advice I will be for ever grateful.
Short history : I failed college In my country , mostly because I was in love with a girl and spent my time with her and because it was one of the worst colleges in my city and It was a waste of time , didn't even have a chance to get a job with the degree from them. After 2 years and the separation from that girl I've decided to go study abroad what I wanted and for the first time in my life I felt amazing , I was going to get a second chance to start all over again and not screw things up . I couldn't wait for the time to pass faster so that I can get there and start my life the way I've always wanted to be , with my priorities set straight.
But sadly , one month and a half ago it all started . I was at a barbecue with my friends and after some time tending the fire I sat down and I started feeling odd . Couldn't explain what was wrong . It felt like something snapped inside me and started to detach myself from the conversations and everything . I figured I was tired and decided to call a cab . When I got home I was desperate . I thought I was going to pass out any moment . (My idea of safety is at home since my parents are doctors , and damn good ones ) They took my blood pressure and it was fine and told me I'm just having an anxiety attack. I said ok , ok... went to bed and fell asleep .
The next following days it got worse. Every time I'd go out I had a strange feeling ... I don't know how to describe it , it feels like walking on rubber , like my brain was bouncing up and down in my skull . I even started to have a strange sort of headache , it felt like a slight tension / pressure on the back of my head and right on the middle of the nose (where the bone starts) and a feeling of dizziness , not visually like when you are drunk , but a feeling like I'm going to drop on my back. I went to an eye doctor and gave me some glasses for reading and staying at the computer . He said it might be because my eyes are tired . Wore them . Nothing. Went to do my blood tests . Everything came back perfectly , thyroid , aids , everything was normal.
One night my heart was pounding and I decided to take my blood pressure . When that device stopped that pumping I felt like my heart stopped and a sudden chill grabbed me and started to feel like I was passing out . In that moment I screamed thinking that I'm going to die right there . I was rushed by my parents to the er and after a ekg they said I was only scared and that I should take a little magnesium. Since then , my health phobia skyrocketed and my physical symptoms got only worse , to the point that I can't leave my house without my parents , staying home alone without the constant terror that my heart is going to stop and nobody would be there to save me.
My father told me that it's because of the fear of leaving home and nothing is wrong with me . But I keep explaining to him ( Dad , my physical symptoms are there all the time and I am not anxious about leaving , My panic attacks on the other hand start when the symptoms get to a peak and they freak me out ) I am not scared about the departure , I am scared that I am going to die before I get there . He dismisses me every time saying that I'm fine and it's in my head.
Went to a psychiatrist and he told me to ignore the sensations because it creates a cycle and gave me anxiar. My new therapist said the same , try to relax . And I keep telling everyone : How can I relax and ignore those horrible feelings ? what person that is sane and feels an excruciating pain in the chest , numbness in the arm not consider if it's a heart attack? How am I supposed do just dismiss these physical symptoms?! I am not anxious , I don't feel butterflies in my stomach , I am not worried about living on my own there .I just want this horrible torment to end .
I went to a cardiologist and said that I only have a mild respiratory arithmia , and a doctor friend of my parent's gave me some iron/magnezium and calcium telling them to remember that they can be out of ballance even if my blood tests are fine. But I still don't feel and different.
My symptoms are the following : Heart pounding , heart palpitations , when I lie down to fall asleep feels like my heart is stopping and I jump back up , again blood pressure fine. Feeling dizzy , feeling like I"m on a boat , headaches , chest pains , stomach pains , lump in throat , lump in stomach , colon near anus feels like it has a heartbeat , feeling all my organs down from my ribcage have a hearbeat , feeling that I will pass out , hard time breathing , palms sweating , recently developed restless leg syndrome and because of that I think I have a strange feeling in my guts and throat , like a vibration numbness , just like it feels when u use a vibration massage thing for some time then turn it off and you have that remaining tingling . These symptoms are random every day but CONSTANT
I don't know what to think anymore , I want to trust my parents and say it's only anxiety but I can see clearly that my father is too subjective about the whole departure thing . He constantly dismisses me in anger and says it's all a lie and a trick that I play because actually I don't want to leave and work and study , AND IT's not TRUE!! That is exactly what I want to do . and my therapist doesn't really help me by telling me how to act , I've found some relief in talking to her and my last two sessions where mostly chats.
As I said everything came back normal . Except an ear doctor said that I have a minor otitis and I followed my treatment but feel no difference .
Please everyone tell me your opinions . Am I suffering from anxiety , or from something physical and my anxiety is triggered because of the sympoms ? I mean I first got the feelings not the worried state. It's started to affect me emotionally , my father nearly had a meltdown today and wanted to beat me because out of my desperation I yelled at them and I feel horrible and they just watch tv shows and whenever I tell them that I feel bad they barely react , they just say ''aha'' or tell me to go away and leave them alone because I'm driving them crazy. For the first time in 13 years I cried today, I feel so hopeless, and alone . Since I'm not a student anymore for 2 months I don't have ensurance so I can't go to the doctor by myself and my parents won't take me anymore . The last thing I'm going to do is visit the top psychiatric in our country (my father's college buddy) who I admit treated my grandfathers , he is the real deal. But my dad made sure to tell him first that I"m perfectly fine . I'm just scared that this attitude of his might overlook something , I know he loves me and wants to act harsh with me so that I man up and do my duty , but he can't seem to understand that I can't just think away these symptoms .And this whole war between us is destroying me . What do you think about me ? Do I have anxiety or should I continue fighting my parents and seek more answers from doctors?

Hey,

i know exactly how you feel. i went through pretty much the same feelings as you describe, and there are many many things that are the cause of it. Things you learnt growing up and the way of thinking it made you develop. I can honestly say that give it about 5-12 months of this severe symptoms in which you will have to stay strong and get through each day one day at a time. dont think about the future, dont worry. i know its harder said then done but you have to try. That is what i did when i had CONSTANT severe anxiety every second of every day and i couldnt shake it off.

god is giving you the message that you have been staying strong for far to long! its time you stopped everything and started loving yourself.

i went through exactly what you did for about 12-15 months and im really thankful that most days im perfectly fine now. the only time i get anxiety now is when i have a job interview and i get loads of anticaportoy anxiety.

i really really really suggest you read my post and my story, http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?32162-PANIC-ATTACKS-ANXIETY-My-1-Year-Story-PLEASE-HELP-im-struggling-to-cope

you need to make all the changes that i did in your life, its only a few months of making the changes i suggest and trust me you can be that amazing guy you always were but this time an even better person, trust me one thing anxiety does it makes you look at life in a much more beautiful way especially once you start healing managing and curing yourself from it. Your family sounds exactly like mine and thats why i havent told anyone about my anxiety problems other then people online. Because there are people out there who wont understand until it happens to them, to be honest i probably was one of them before it happened to me.

this is your time now over the next year to make a change and YOU WILL COME OUT OF IT,