Unfair criticism with a small grain of truth is THE WORST

[Ankhsious]

Sharing something to see if it rings true for others.

If someone criticizes you and says you have a yellow nose and it's obviously not true it won't bother you. If it is something that is obviously true then you have probably dealth with it. But what if it's a partial truth and it confuses you and rattles your sense of self? It can spiral you into an analysis paralysis.

This has happened to me 7 years ago when my panic attacks first hit and still haunts me to this day.

I resolved it this morning with the following compassionate understanding :

"Whether the criticism is true or not, or fair or not, or kind or not, or helpful or not, I definitely FAILED at taking this criticism in a healthy way. And that's okay, because I have succeeded at everything I have tried in life but seldom without trial and error so I'm going to give myself a break."

[Dahila]

Criticism is tough to accept, and it is same for everyone. Ankhsious I do not think anyone takes it in a healthy way. I think we should learn from that, but with love and acceptance so the hurt is not as painful. I like your post very much man:)

[Dorriekeepson23]

[QUOTE=Dahila;189890]Criticism is tough to accept, and it is same for everyone. Ankhsious I do not think anyone takes it in a healthy way. I think we should learn from that, but with love and acceptance so the hurt is not as painful. I like your post very much man:)[/QUOTE

I like it to Dee Dee! ! :) :)

[Im-Suffering]

Checklist : (for your personal evaluation) Many tied into anxiety, for your edification (all who read this)

The fear of criticism -


This fear is almost as universal as the fear of poverty, and its effects are just as fatal to personal achievement, mainly because this fear destroys initiative, and discourages the use of imagination.

The major symptoms of the fear are:

SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS. Generally expressed through nervousness, timidity in conversation and in meeting strangers, awkward movement of the hands and limbs, shifting of the eyes.

LACK OF POISE. Expressed through lack of voice control, nervousness in the presence of others, poor posture of body, poor memory.

PERSONALITY. Lacking in firmness of decision, personal charm, and ability to express opinions definitely. The habit of side-stepping issues instead of meeting them squarely. Agreeing with others without careful examination of their opinions.

INFERIORITY COMPLEX. The habit of expressing self-approval by word of mouth and by actions, as a means of covering up a feeling of inferiority. Using "big words" to impress others, (often without knowing the real meaning of the words). Imitating others in dress, speech and manners. Boasting of imaginary achievements. This sometimes gives a surface appearance of a feeling of superiority.

EXTRAVAGANCE. The habit of trying to "keep up with the Joneses," spending beyond one's income.

LACK OF INITIATIVE. Failure to embrace opportunities for self-advancement, fear to express opinions, lack of confidence in one's own ideas, giving evasive answers to questions asked by superiors, hesitancy of manner and speech, deceit in both words and deeds.

LACK OF AMBITION. Mental and physical laziness, lack of self-assertion, slowness in reaching decisions, easily influenced by others, the habit of criticising others behind their backs and flattering them to their faces, the habit of accepting defeat without protest, quitting an undertaking when opposed by others, suspicious of other people without cause, lacking in tactfulness of manner and speech, unwillingness to accept the blame for mistakes