crazy anxiety

[overlyattachedmommy]

I have 2 boys 2 and 5 months. All I do everyday all day is worry about me dying and what they would do with out me. I have a very strong bond with them both and I love them so much the thought of them not having me to raise them scares me so much. I sit around finding new cancers and such constantly. I feel like I'm missing out on so much because I can't make my mind shut up. I've been on medication after medication and nothing is working. I just don't know what else to do.

[Anne1221]

Which medications have you tried? Don't give up trying to find a good medication, or a good doctor to help you. You should be enjoying those children instead of worrying. Have you had a good therapist? There are so many different medications out there, both for anxiety and antidepressants, it seems like something should work for you. Good thing you have so much to live for!

[Kixxi]

Dear overlyattachedmommy,

It is quite normal to experience these feelings. In fact, this just means that you are a mum that really loves her children and that is something to be proud of. The problem you are currently experiencing is quite common for people with anxiety and nothing to be ashamed of. The "What if" problem, for example: What if something happened to me, what would happen to my children? Who would look after them, is one off the main triggers for people with anxiety. I myself have been suffering with anxiety for some years and there are certainly a lot of pointers I can give you, besides medication. Of course every person is different, this means that it does work but it takes practice. How long depends on the person.

This is what helps for me, I hope it will help for you as well:
1. "What if" is not a good thinking pattern, but for someone with anxiety it cannot be helped sometimes. Try asking the same question, but a positive turn, for example:
a. What if something happened to me - STOP and change to - This is just anxiety, nothing will happen to me.
b. It is normal for me to have this anxiety and everyone experiences this every now and then.
c. I deserve to be happy right now. This anxiety will pass.
d. Nothing bad will happen to me, I had these thoughts before and nothing happened. It just passes.

2. Same as me you probably have some hypochondria. This isn't always a bad thing, but you always look for "bad" illnesses and worst case scenario's. You worry about the worst diseases hitting you. These are my tips for this:

a. Keep in your mind that you project certain symptoms on your own body and that this has to do with your anxiety.
b. Don't be afraid to go to a doctor to reassure you. Have a discussion about your fears and worries.
c. You have a right to treatment, even if your illness is not present. Do not feel bad to seek advice.
d. Take all symptoms you look up with a pinch of salt for example: write you symptoms before you start looking them up. This way you cannot project them as you see them.

Having your mind constantly talking doom thoughts to yourself is something I am very familiar with. What really helped for me is regular practice of yoga and breathing exercises, because when your body is calm, your mind will go calmer to. Unfortunately I also take some medication still, but I think I am at the point I can start building down. Medication should only be used to take the edge of. Emotional and physical stress needs to be addressed as well to make anxiety stop.

I hope this helps you a bit. If you have any questions for me, feel free to ask them. I'll gladly share my experiences with you.