Anxiety?

[petrified]

Hi everyone

Just wondering people's thoughts on anxiety being hereditary.

I think my 10yo is showing some signs of anxiety mainly health anxiety.
He was in the bath tonight and shouted me up to have a look at his legs. He seems to have perhaps a heat rash or little bites on them. My husband and I have tried to reassure him of this fact but he was pleading for a doctors appointment. I've promised to make one tomorrow.
He has convinced himself he has something wrong as his dance teacher is now in a wheelchair due to some condition we are unaware of. It's horrible he won't take our reassurance as parents and I wish I knew more about his dance teacher to reassure him more.

I suppose I'm worried I have caused this as a result of him picking up on my anxiety or has he inherited this from me. I really hope this is a one off and not the start of something more.

Hannah

[Fourteen14]

There is no hard and fast genetic proof of it being hereditary, but the current train of thought is that children are 5 x more likely to display the traits if a parent has it.

My family has a pedigree of mental health conditions (I was lucky and got health anxiety only).

My opinion is there is a large bearing on genetics as well as learned behaviour. (I was around 12 when I started with it).

[Fourteen14]

In fact I can even remember the strain of bacteria I was worrying about at 12 years old.

Necrotising fasciitis! - Streptococcus Group A

Ha ha ! That's ridiculous !

It was a media frenzy, there had been about 5 cases of people having contracted the "flesh eating disease" from open heart surgery, the BBC blew it all out of proportion, and I sat and cried in the bath thinking it was pandemic.

My 6 year old niece is also showing early signs of anxiety also.

[petrified]

You see for me I think it's always been there. I can remember being around 5 and waking up panicking I had swallowed a marble and waking my dad.

But as far as I'm aware no one in my family has suffered anxiety. My dad I'm sure has some form of depression through losing my mam and becoming a widow at a young age. He turned to drink for self medication though. But apart from that its never been spoken about in the family and is quite a taboo subject. (Perhaps that's why I don't talk about mine.)

I think a lot of things are said to be genetic but I do think he must be picking up on my behaviour, even though I try not to show it. This parenting thing is hard :-/

[petrified]

In fact I can even remember the strain of bacteria I was worrying about at 12 years old.

Necrotising fasciitis! - Streptococcus Group A

Ha ha ! That's ridiculous !

It was a media frenzy, there had been about 5 cases of people having contracted the "flesh eating disease" from open heart surgery, the BBC blew it all out of proportion, and I sat and cried in the bath thinking it was pandemic.

My 6 year old niece is also showing early signs of anxiety also.

Haha that's crazy but I can remember convincing myself I was going to get mad cows disease when I was little lol.

6 is really young bless her

[free808]

My 12 year old also shows some signs of anxiety. Even a couple years ago, he was often wanting to stay home from school because he "felt sick." Eventually, I started to catch on that it was nausea caused by anxiety. Nausea has been my main anxiety attack symptom for many years too.

I don't know if it's hereditary. From the research I've done on it, it seems that scientists don't all agree on it. The whole nature vs nurture debate is still debatable, I guess. I tend to think it's a combination of biology and environment...like people with certain genetic makeup may be more likely to develop a disorder, but that it's not set in stone.

But I'm no scientist =)

I've been talking a lot with my son about my own anxiety struggles, and that has helped him too. I've finally got him to talk more openly with me when he is feeling nervous about going out to a friend's birthday party or whatever. At first, he'll insist that he just doesn't want to go because it sounds boring to him, but eventually it comes out that he's feeling nervous about it. So I don't push him. I still let him make his own decisions, but I also try to encourage him by sharing my own struggles with avoidance behavior and how that pattern of response has only hurt me (and us) over the years. It has helped him to push himself out of his comfort zone a little bit on some occasions.

So I would just try to keep the lines of communication open with him and share your own experiences and vulnerabilities with him. Kids are pretty smart =) He'll think a lot about what you say, even if it doesn't seem to make a difference right away.

Good luck.

Oh, and I would just take him to the doctor anyway to have that rash checked out. It might be something simple and not anxiety-related after all.

Aloha, Chris

[Fourteen14]

There is no such thing as perfect parents (that's golden rule no.1 dealt with) :)

It could be ticket to success, helping your son deal with it at a young age is added incentive to curb your own anxiety.

Mothers (mostly) blame themselves for literally everything! Unnecessarily I might add. If there is a genetic link, it's a 50/50 chance from either parent. Plus, he is at the age where he is forming concepts (the questions about death and why why why)

It's not uncommon at his age.

My only advice (as a non parent) would be to treat it in the same way you would the bad dream.

Talk it through, what is he afraid of? Why is he afraid of it? Why he doesn't need to be afraid of it? :)

[Fourteen14]

Great advice free808

[petrified]

Hi chris

You sound like you have a great relationship with your son and he seems really intelligent and older than his years. I'm sorry he is going through this but it seems like he had a fab teacher in yourself to learn from.

Yeah I'm going to take him to the doctors if only to put his mind a rest. He only seems to be showing signs of health anxiety at the moment, but to be fair that's how my anxiety shows.
Perhaps sharing stories of all the ailments I have thought I have had may help him too, plus I'm sure he will get a giggle out of some them lol.

Thanks for your advice :-)

[Fourteen14]

Haha that's crazy but I can remember convincing myself I was going to get mad cows disease when I was little lol. 6 is really young bless her

OMG! Yes.... Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease

How could I forget that !

Ha ha ..... It's like a trip down health anxiety memory lane! :D

[petrified]

There is no such thing as perfect parents (that's golden rule no.1 dealt with) :)

It could be ticket to success, helping your son deal with it at a young age is added incentive to curb your own anxiety.

Mothers (mostly) blame themselves for literally everything! Unnecessarily I might add. If there is a genetic link, it's a 50/50 chance from either parent.

Plus, he is at the age where he is forming concepts (the questions about death and why why why)

It's not uncommon at his age.

My only advise (as a non parent) would be to treat it in the same way you would the bad dream.

Talk it through, what is he afraid of? Why is he afraid of it? Why he doesn't need to be afraid of it?

:)

Thanks fourteen

Your spot on!
I think most mothers do blame themselves for everything and are always thinking we aren't doing the best for our kids.

I'm definitely going to open up more its probably not helping him just telling him I'm poorly when really I'm panicking. He's a bright little lad and knows more than I give him credit for sometimes.

I will let you know how we get on with him at the doctors.

Thanks again both of you :-)

Hannah

[Kuma]

It would be hard to design a good study to evaluate the extent to which anxiety is hereditary because the non-genetic "environmental" factors (kid exposed to behaviors of the anxious parent) would be a significant confounding factor. You could potentially look at kids who were not raised by their biological parents, comparing those with anxious biological parents to those with non-anxious biological parents, but even then it would be very challenging to set up good control groups becuase of the number of factors that could influence anxiety. And the reality is that costly studies like this don't tend to get done unless the answer can make someone (usually a pharma company) a lot of money -- which probably would not be the case here. So I am guessing that, on this interesting question, we will be left with little more than speculation for a long time.

[petrified]

OMG! Yes.... Creutzfeldt–Jakob disease

How could I forget that !

Ha ha ..... It's like a trip down health anxiety memory lane! :D

Haha now that's a new thread.

Health anxiety memory lane! I bet there are a few random things on there hehe :-)

[petrified]

That's a very interesting point kuma.

I think all conditions have some scientist/doctor saying that they are hereditary in some way.

[Fourteen14]

Oooh we could do this on the exposed thread!

Like a quiz with cyber prizes !

"In what year was the salmonella from eggs scare "? Winner receives a smily face online.

Something like that?

Ha ha! :D

And Kuma, yes definitely a hard one to study, although we do take family history on board in general assessment.

[shdwfx989899]

I recently learned that I have three cousins also suffering from anxiety disorders.

[petrified]

Oooh we could do this on the exposed thread!

Like a quiz with cyber prizes !

"In what year was the salmonella from eggs scare "? Winner receives a smily face online.

Something like that?

Ha ha! :D

And Kuma, yes definitely a hard one to study, although we do take family history on board in general assessment.

Haha it may cause more anxiety cheating and googling the answers haha.
I would end up with lepracy or the plague before you no it haha.

[petrified]

I recently learned that I have three cousins also suffering from anxiety disorders.

There does seem to be a link. I suppose it's just bat to try and spot the signs early enough and try and break the cycle.
That maybe pretty hard in our day and age though :-/

[petrified]

Right had him at the doctors today after school and it's little bites off him playing in the grass.

It seems to have put his mind at rest and he seemed to take the reassurance that he isn't loosing the use of his legs bless him.

Hopefully this has done the trick but he is showing a lot of signs of how I used to be as a kid and it's scary. I didn't get a good chance to chat with him tonight as I've been working and haven't seen him much tonight. But I plan to very soon.

Thanks again everyone :-)

[free808]

Aww...good news! =)
A few years from now, he's gonna be like, "Hey Mom, remember that time I thought my legs were gonna fall off but it was just bug bites from playing in the grass? BAHAHAHA..."

[petrified]

Aww...good news! =)
A few years from now, he's gonna be like, "Hey Mom, remember that time I thought my legs were gonna fall off but it was just bug bites from playing in the grass? BAHAHAHA..."

Haha the poor child is really like me putting it like that haha.

I once thought I would explode in a hot bath because I had flammable deodorant on lol.
I've never changed to this day hehe :-)

[needtogetwell]

Hannah,

Tell him that story, I bet he gets a good giggle out of it.

:D

[JohnC]

I believe that anxiety can be learned from the parent or guardian. My mom has always had anxiety and I remember it like it was yesterday.