Anxiety because of someone possible ?

[defectivemodel]

hi everyone

first time poster but i been lurking around the forum reading. Can't seem to find a thread with my issues so here it goes

I'm 30 yrs old, stead job not stressful at all , very boring most of the time cause i don't have much to do , workout 5 days a week for over 3 years now , always watch what i eat even tho i do cheat at times . Use multivatims , magnesium/calcium..

About 10 yrs ago i was home smoking weed , finished smoking a joint, hit the bed and bang got a panic attack. After that i got daily anxiety for about a year and a half. At that time it was just physical symptoms heart palp , sweat , chest pressure.

I was depressed because of that but never had mental confusion about anything. So after i was introduced to anxiety i accepted it , figured i'll be like this all my life. After a year and half it just went away on its own. All that was left was insomnia issues that i dealt with.

So for like 8 years i was fine. Met a girl , went out with her for 7yrs until last december. Broke up with her and started seeing this other girl.

Now ever since i got involved wit this girl i been having major anxiety issues. The girl is amazing , beautiful , smart ,very fun , amazing in bed and crazy about me .

I have days where i feel so in love with her , then randomly i start thinking about it and starts to think i dont love her , that causes me lots of anxiety cause it feels so real.

in the 4 months i been with her , i had lots of anxiety about her not being hot even tho she is , about being in a relationship , about only wanting sex from her and about not loving her. Then i have what i call moments of clarity where i'm in love with her and all is well in the world. That feeling is also very real.

Note that i have been fully open about all this with her. She knows it all and chooses to stick around even tho i told her repeatedly that i'll understand if she dumps my messed up self

So those issues cause me daily anxiety and sometimes a hard time sleepin. Its the first time in my life that i'm confused about my own feelings toward someone , i always been someone who knew what he wanted and how he felt.

So my question is this , am i really not in love with this girl and just forcing myself , or is it possible that anxiety is causing me those doubts ? is it ROCD ?

My therapist believes its the anxiety talking but since i'm hard headed and someone who looks into science for answers , i have a hard time agreeing her.

I also have a hard time believing its anxiety cause it fees so real when i think all those negative thoughts. Also i get anxious about nothing else in my life , only her . From what i read on the interwebz most people with GAD have anxiety about different aspect of their lives.

So what you guys think about this ? any input is appreciated

[alfred24]

Well technically speaking, a therapist's job is scientific in nature, and she's right. It is your anxiety. Anxiety isn't a disease or something of that sort. It is a reaction. It's the same thing that happens to you when you feel you are in danger or are frightened. It just becomes more intense when you don't understand what is causing it. After my first panic attack I dealt with anxiety like you, daily for about a year or so. About 6 months in i accepted it and then it started to subside. It went away on its own.

[defectivemodel]

Well technically speaking, a therapist's job is scientific in nature, and she's right. It is your anxiety. Anxiety isn't a disease or something of that sort. It is a reaction. It's the same thing that happens to you when you feel you are in danger or are frightened. It just becomes more intense when you don't understand what is causing it. After my first panic attack I dealt with anxiety like you, daily for about a year or so. About 6 months in i accepted it and then it started to subside. It went away on its own.

Well the time i just accepted the anxiety it was just the physical symptoms mixed with some depression.

Now it's playing with my head , not at all the same thing , i'm not sure if i should listen to my negative thoughts or ignore em.

I mean usually when u not interested in someone you simply move on , you don't get anxious and depressed

[alfred24]

Anxiety is just a bunch of physical symptoms that are caused by the mind. Your negative thoughts are simply thoughts and can't do any harm. Just let them go. You don't listen to them. Even if it is messing with your head. You feel anxiety when your nerves get sensitive, when the adrenaline gets released into your bloodstream, thus a faster heart rate. If you like someone then continue with them. If not, then let them go. If you're not sure then continue until
You are sure. I mean this is what dating is after all.