cancelled everything :/

[brittany32888]

So I called my "adopted" grandmother to talk to her about the issues I've been dealing with lately. Tomorrow I'm supposed to be going to an out of town convention with my husband, but it has been causing severe anxiety, and even attacks off and on today. She told me to not go and to talk to him about it. So I did and he seems ok with it. I just feel like shit about it. I feel like I'm copping out. And I waited until the day before to tell him I didn't want to go. It's not really fair to him and I feel guilty. I kinda fear it's going to get old over time, I've kept him from doing things before and I think he's held it against me. What if he gets fed up and wants to bail? Could I blame him? He always tries to give me reassurance, and I think he really tries to understand me, but my insecurities tend to keep coming out. Any thoughts? Am I taking the easy way out by not going?

[BrookeLynnnn]

So I called my "adopted" grandmother to talk to her about the issues I've been dealing with lately. Tomorrow I'm supposed to be going to an out of town convention with my husband, but it has been causing severe anxiety, and even attacks off and on today. She told me to not go and to talk to him about it. So I did and he seems ok with it. I just feel like shit about it. I feel like I'm copping out. And I waited until the day before to tell him I didn't want to go. It's not really fair to him and I feel guilty. I kinda fear it's going to get old over time, I've kept him from doing things before and I think he's held it against me. What if he gets fed up and wants to bail? Could I blame him? He always tries to give me reassurance, and I think he really tries to understand me, but my insecurities tend to keep coming out. Any thoughts? Am I taking the easy way out by not going?

Honestly, I would do the same.

If you're not ready, you're not ready! Don't beat yourself up over it! You don't wanna put yourself in a situation that'll send you into a full on panic!!

Your guy won't leave you! :) it sounds like a similar situation with my boyfriend. They love us & they're not gonna leave!

So take a deep breath! It'll all work out my friend!

[brittany32888]

Honestly, I would do the same.

If you're not ready, you're not ready! Don't beat yourself up over it! You don't wanna put yourself in a situation that'll send you into a full on panic!!

Your guy won't leave you! :) it sounds like a similar situation with my boyfriend. They love us & they're not gonna leave!

So take a deep breath! It'll all work out my friend!

Thanks... I know, I tend to be melodramatic, but I can't say I would want to put up with something like this, especially if I didn't understand it. So I freak out about it.... I just want to be well already.

[BrookeLynnnn]

Thanks... I know, I tend to be melodramatic, but I can't say I would want to put up with something like this, especially if I didn't understand it. So I freak out about it.... I just want to be well already.

Yea I know what you mean!!

I'm sorry! I hope you feel better!!

[NixonRulz]

That is a tough decision

I did that a few times during holidays and felt like hell that I I didn't go

You can get through this pretty quickly

Don't think that this will always be your life

Get yourself in a better place and you will be able to do those things like trips

But don't make a habit of it. Do it too often and it can become habitual

And regarding your decision, the time to think about a decision is before you make it

No second guessing after. You made the decision now stand by it.

You did it for you

That's where your focus needs to be now

[brittany32888]

That is a tough decision

I did that a few times during holidays and felt like hell that I I didn't go

You can get through this pretty quickly

Don't think that this will always be your life

Get yourself in a better place and you will be able to do those things like trips

But don't make a habit of it. Do it too often and it can become habitual

And regarding your decision, the time to think about a decision is before you make it

No second guessing after. You made the decision now stand by it.

You did it for you

That's where your focus needs to be now

Ugh I'm just ready to be done with this shit. I always have to have a stupid routine, no room for surprises or changes. And one little thing can turn my world upside down. I want to be spontaneous and adventurous.
I don't know why you space your sentences out that way, but I like it. It's more pleasing to my rather shifty eyes. :)

[NixonRulz]

Ugh I'm just ready to be done with this shit. I always have to have a stupid routine, no room for surprises or changes. And one little thing can turn my world upside down. I want to be spontaneous and adventurous. I don't know why you space your sentences out that way, but I like it. It's more pleasing to my rather shifty eyes. :)

My eyes too!

Jump on the bandwagon and skip a space

Everybody's doin it!

Just credit me at the end of each post

I kinda need the attention

[brittany32888]

My eyes too!

Jump on the bandwagon and skip a space

Everybody's doin it!

Just credit me at the end of each post

I kinda need the attention

Ok let's see......



Sometimes I've tried and it hasn't worked.

I think my phone knows I'm an anxious

Person and intentionally fucks with me.

Like last night for instance it wasn't letting

Use the forum and I thought I was going

To have a simultaneous stroke/heart

Attack 2-for-1 kinda deal. I survived

Apparently, but then I thought, "great,

Now I'm anxious AND co-dependent.

(Sigh) oh well...

[NixonRulz]

Ok let's see...... Sometimes I've tried and it hasn't worked. I think my phone knows I'm an anxious Person and intentionally fucks with me. Like last night for instance it wasn't letting Use the forum and I thought I was going To have a simultaneous stroke/heart Attack 2-for-1 kinda deal. I survived Apparently, but then I thought, "great, Now I'm anxious AND co-dependent. (Sigh) oh well...

Ok. Your skip a line needs a little work.

But I'm glad you didn't have a stroke or heart attack last night

Cause you won't

But you'll get that soon enough

[brittany32888]

Ok. Your skip a line needs a little work. But I'm glad you didn't have a stroke or heart attack last night Cause you won't But you'll get that soon enough

Yeah I figured I wouldn't REALLY have one but I was upset none the less