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View Full Version : I just found out my husband's been cheating



Velrose
03-17-2008, 04:11 AM
well... the subject more or less says it all. Tonight... I was in bed asleep and the phone rang. My husband works third shift, and I answered and it was him. He was in tears, and was talking about how everything was beginning to become too much and he's stressed out. So of course, being his wife and loving him, I tell him to calm down, and that I am here to talk.

After a few minutes... we hang up and he goes back to work (he was on break) and I email him--talking about how sometimes... it helps to talk and have someone to listen and that I was there for him.

He emails me back. It goes something like this:

Heather--you don't understand, I can't talk to you, but I have to tell you this. Me and (said girl) have been camming and sending photos to each other. We cyber all of the time--and BLAH BLAH BLAH I love you.

Ok... now I know that some people don't think of cybering and camming as cheating, but I do. I stand by the one piece of wisdom I think Dr. Phil was right now--if you wouldn't do it in front of your spouse/significant other--it's cheating.

My husband and I had an understanding. He did something similar to this several years ago. We worked through it, and I had FINALLY gotten to the point that I trusted him. And now... this.

I had a panic attack after I read the email. I ran into the living room, threw a large candle across the room. It broke all over the floor. I couldnt breath, I was shaking, my heart was pounding.

I want him to hurt. I want him to feel the pain I feel. What makes it worse... this girl knows me. She's a watcher on my deviantart page. She's talked to me on aim--and to make it worse...she says there is nothing wrong with what she did and she will not apologize for it.

I'm sick.

I'm confused.

I'm hurt.

I can't stop crying.

I have no one. No friends. No family.

What am I supposed to do?

I'm scared.

I hate myself for loving him. I hate myself for it.

desiderata
03-17-2008, 06:29 AM
velrose

much much love goes from me to you in this difficult time, i know that nothing a can say will take away your pain at the moment, so i can just offer you my ears.
i too am going through a difficult time with a man, being lied too is such a difficult thing to deal with, and its especially hard when you cant stop loving the person even though you might desperately want to hate them.
talk to me whenever you like

lauren x

Velrose
03-17-2008, 06:44 AM
I just... I HATE myself for loving him--because I am afraid it will happen again. Granted, he admitted everything to me... but iono...

What I hate... is this girl... she sees that she did nothing wrong, in fact, she made me out to be this... iono... prude because I saw a problem with her sending pornographic pictures of herself to my husband and camming with him. YES...I spoke with her. And YES... she has a boyfriend, who is apparently, A OK with her doing things like this.

I feel so disrespected by both parties... my husband and the girl.