How my anxiety was cured.

[NoMoreAnxietyForMe]

Hi Guys, I wrote this today after having a discussion and helping a friend who has been suffering from panic attacks etc. I then remembered back to when I was bad, and remembered all the hours I spent reading forums and blogs looking for help, so here is a my story, and how I got rid of anxiety from my life forever. The post is split into two parts as was over the character limited, so the first reply on the thread is the second part!


My Cure For Anxiety

In modern day life, you cant afford to be slowed down. When there are qualifications needed, careers to pursue, children to teach or partners to enjoy it is all to important to have a clear and healthy mind set. For a lot of people, this is not always the case. I wanted to write this as a short story, to give you an insight into my 8 Months of severe anxiety. And how it took one person to answer the simplest of questions that doctors couldn't, which helped me kick anxiety into touch.

It all started when I started University, a completely new world to me. I left my friends behind and began my new life in a new city with completely new people, I just never thought this would be a problem. The prospect of starting a new life elsewhere in the university atmosphere sounds all to exciting and could not wait to get started, however for me it just did not start out that way. I started the move to my university digs a few weeks earlier than most, as that was when my rent date began on my new flat, so I may as well of took advantage and get settled in.

As my parents left me, with my fridge full of food and no one else yet moved into the building I was staying in, that's when it became so real. I had done it, moved to University! My life can only get better from here, right? Well, it was the loneliest first two weeks of my life, I had no one around for 14 days, for the first 7 days I did not talk to anyone in person. I would occasionally go for a walk, or to the shop but that was it. I literally did not know what to do. In the following week, I ventured further into town, and came across a nice little bar/pub of which I could play darts in. So I spent the next week of every day sipping on lemonade and throwing darts non stop, until finally the time came when all the others started moving in, and I could get chatting!

To cut to the chase pretty quickly, I made a couple of friends, but for a first year student, I kind of found it hard, what made it harder was the fact I had just been isolated here for two weeks, and just couldn't find it in me any more to be a part of everything. I became close friends with one of the other quiet guys in the building, and we used to go out together, eat together and study together. Was actually a pretty cool mix, we liked the same stuff so all was good!

That all stopped a few months down the line, for family reasons he had to end University and head back home for good, I helped him move his things and off he went! And there I was, back in my room alone again, although plenty of people were now moved into the building, I still felt alone. I just couldn’t be bothered to make an effort to make new friends.

It also hit me, that I had just completed 3 months of University work in two weeks. I had nothing to do, I remember sitting on the edge of my bed thinking about what the hell am I going to do... and then boom. It hit me, It felt like a bomb exploding in my chest, constant pounding pressure like no other sensation I had ever felt in my life. My heart was booming, 3 times faster than resting heart rate. The ringing in my ears was so real, it was if someone was standing next to me blowing a whistle, it all seemed so real. I tried standing but was constantly off balance. Whatever was happening it felt real. My first panic attack, of many.

The biggest mistake I made during the start of my anxiety was keeping it to myself. I didn't want to sound crazy, simple as that. My life got to the point where these attacks would be a frequent occurrence, almost 2 – 3 times a day. I remember one time walking around in a big shopping complex where I lived, walking out of a video game store in a big crowd and one hit me then. It was my first attack which happened when other people were present, and what made it worse, was it was in front of hundreds of people. It was a strange experience, the sounds of people shouting, laughter, babies crying, shopping bags rustling, big issue salesman become so clear but as separate parts. I could pick out every little detail that came out of peoples mouths, I heard everything, I become off balance, I dropped my shopping bag and didn’t even know, the ringing in my ears began and then I heard complete silence, I could see everyone, walking about lips moving but no sounds coming out, just a ringing sound in my ears. I just stood there, knowing that it would pass. Several minutes later, a completely normal me emerges, and I feel absolutely fine, a little tired, however fine. I will never forget this episode, I will never forget the euphoria feeling I felt when it first began, it was completely new to me.

The panic attacks did not get worse, they all stayed about the same level of weirdness, and I kind of got used to them. However the reasons for having them started getting extremely severe, the smallest of things would start setting me off, to the point I thought I was going mad. I remember sitting on the sofa once, in the common room (I was alone) I felt some palpitations in my arms, and could actually see the muscles jumping up and down, at the time, I knew nothing about anxiety disorders and didn’t realise palpitations are a common symptom of an anxiety disorder, but naturally as an anxiety sufferer, you think the worst. I instantly thought “Heart Attack, I am going to die” and then yes, yet another panic attack. The same old stuff happening, and then all of a sudden I'm back to normal!

[NoMoreAnxietyForMe]

The worst reason for having a panic attack, and I still feel stupid for it. Was when my chest was killing (It hurt for 6 – 8 months constantly, due to the anxiety disorder) I started feeling my chest, and felt my sternum (bone in between rib cage) After feeling it, I even knew what this was, but for some reason, the second I touched it I had the worst panic attack ever, it was the same symptoms as all the others explained but this time I couldn’t breathe, this time I new I was going mad. I called a taxi and went up to the hospital, they hooked me up to an ECG machine. Whilst waiting for the machine to monitor the results, the nurse said to me, if its all okay you can go home straight away, if there are any cause for concerns we will take you next door and you will be evaluated by one of the doctors. The results came through and the nurse said she would like the doctor to evaluate me, so instantly, I panicked again, no panic attack though... I just felt extremely nervous. I laid down on a hospital bed for an hour, every now and again, a nurse would come over and offer me some water, and talk to me about Uni and any assignments coming up. I said that they are all handed in (I done most of my work early) and she would go. The doctor finally came over, looking at some data on paper and started asking me questions about University, he told me to stop drinking energy drinks and alcohol, he said how damaging they can be. For some reason, I just couldn't tell him I hadn't drunk for 6 months, for some reason, I felt like I was being told off, for causing this to myself and I wasn't even drinking energy drinks etc. He then said I can go home, but something stuck in my head, why did the nurse not send me straight home? There was obvious signs of stress on my heart, of which the machine picked up... but instead of asking further questions and examining me further they shrugged it off as “Uni Lad” drinking to much and not getting enough sleep. I felt even more let down, and made me even more worried about sharing this problem with others.

Anxiety was also extremely damaging on my sleep. I was getting extremely bad sleep paralysis, sleep paralysis is a condition where you are basically paralysed on your bed, you can't move, your chest hurts and when you try to move other parts of your body it hurts. This continued for a few months, I finally got round to looking up what the problem was, and that was when I came across sleep paralysis and how common it was in anxiety sufferers. To summarise, the process of sleep is that your brain shuts off your body, and then shuts off itself, the issue with sleep paralysis is that it doesn’t shut off the brain properly and you are left in a paralysed state, sometimes for hours.

Occasionally, I would be to scared to sleep so I would sit up in the communal area in the building I lived in. Watching TV occasionally someone would come in from their night out, and have a chat, which was my favourite part of my day. I knew I needed to take action, the university had a mental health department of which I made an appointment and went. After explaining everything to someone for the first time, it felt great however was short lived, as the only thing that any of these doctors and consultants wanted to do was to put me on tablets, more specifically Anti Depressants. I refused, I explained that this is a condition caused by my own mind, is it not? So why treat it with something else? I simply refused, I was not depressed, if anything I still used to get out of the flat, and do stuff. I'd go shopping etc, I didn’t completely isolate myself. I just wanted the nerves, the panic attacks and lack of sleep to stop, the feeling of walking on clouds and not ever actually feeling present to stop. Once again, I felt extremely let down.

This is when it all changed, I went to bed one evening and was feeling stressed as usual, couldn’t sleep, when I almost did I would have another sleep paralysis episode which would result in another panic attack. So I got up and made my way over to the communal area in the building. I watched some TV and fell asleep.

The following day I spent the entire time in the common room, which people coming in and out, having a little chat and off they went. However one of the chats I had with someone changed my life forever. A girl, who I knew from the building sat down and asked me why I am always up late in the common room. I explained how hard I was finding it to sleep, due to anxiety problems, I mentioned a little about panic attacks but didn't go into to much detail, after all, what did she know? Well, it turned out she was in-fact studying a degree in Psychology. She explained to me that a large part of anxiety is excess energy and a great way of helping would be to exercise. It just made complete sense, my heart is beating 3 times faster than normal, so lets give it something to beat about. That day I ran, I ran for miles, for hours. I remember running into the night ending up extremely far away, and into the night. I just didn’t care, I just kept running. I left in the early afternoon and arrived home early hours of the morning. I got in, and felt amazing, I didn’t have a care in the world. My heart was tired, it was tired of beating fast and started warming down into a resting heart rate. I was also to tired to worry, I was to tired to care about any problems I was having, I just wanted to have a shower and sleep, lets just say I didn’t make it out of my towel before sleeping for a full 9 hours, as cliché as it sounds I could not believe it.

The next day I went swimming for hours followed by a run home, I then done some University work followed by another run, all this exercise made me want to eat well, so my diet improved dramatically. And there it was, my new lifestyle, 3 months on and not one panic attack, this felt extremely strange, as a panic attack everyday for months on end really takes it's toll. I was cured, and not only that my entire life improved, I felt more confident and was taking my exercise to a new level.

I learnt an extremely valuable lesson that day, bottling up your emotions and problems can be extremely damaging and although sharing them to the wrong people may not help, you might just get lucky like I did, and get the person that can really help. They did not recommend tablets, or pills or regular therapy sessions. They recommended the most important aspect your mind and body was designed for and that was exercise. I cant even remember If I ever thanked this person. And maybe one day I will get the chance to, however the bigger picture of all this is Anxiety affects millions of people, and I can understand the life changing affects this disorder can have on your life.

Anxiety at times can be complex, and be completely different for everybody however in my case, my heart was beating too fast, I was panicking and after time it was causing me long term affects such as panic attacks and sleep deprivation. Panic attacks are also known as fight or flight response, because your body is ready for either a fight, or to fly (run away)... I did just that, and have not had a problem in the last 4 years. During this time, I have encountered a lot of people, friends with the same problems I had. They also took these steps and advice I was given and their Anxiety improved dramatically. I remember during my 6 – 8 months of terrible anxiety looking up various solutions online on forums and blogs, of which thousands of other people were in the same boat. All I needed was a forum or blog post like this one which is why I have created this, and I am thankful every day that this one person, on this particular occasion could help me the way she did.

[AmberGbenga]

Oh god yes... This is amazing. I can't stress enough how much excersize has helped me. It's been almost 2 months panic attack free and I've been busy, a lot of excersize! People just shrug it off.. But god if I could just let them in my mind from the transformation maybe it would help them see

[jessed03]

Nice write up, always good when people share what worked for them.

[vonnhelsing]

This is very Inspirational. Just what I needed today after having a horrible day at work. Thanks for sharing : )

[KitahD]

I loved your post - but don't what anyone to be discouraged if exercise doesn't work. My first panic attacks started during a time when I ran two miles everyday. Never had a panic attack prior to that time. I've never been an exercise guru but the time when I was most active with exercise didn't keep my anxiety at bay. Exercise is so important - but now I have anxiety about running again because I link it to my first panic attack.

[Nabil Shahzad]

its really amazing to hear your story, i also had same problem. i tried to coupe up with exercise and it worked like charm, 40 min run in morning or 1 hour swiming in evening. i regret the day i left the routine and right now i am having panic attack!

[NoMoreAnxietyForMe]

This is very Inspirational. Just what I needed today after having a horrible day at work. Thanks for sharing : )

Glad you like it :) What made me spend the time on it was how important it was for me at the time of suffering! Don't give up :)

[j brown]

Glad you like it :) What made me spend the time on it was how important it was for me at the time of suffering! Don't give up :)

That was a good information, I am new to this whole anxiety thing I also work out a lot and run too. Like yesterday I ran 7 and a half miles and played some hoop. But afterwards even though my heart was acting up while I was running I feel nervous after I get home and keep checking if it's beating ok or if I did too much, did you have this fear at first? And how much were you running ?

[lizard0921]

That is awesome! Very inspirational♥ God bless you!

[Greggs2583]

The worst reason for having a panic attack, and I still feel stupid for it. Was when my chest was killing (It hurt for 6 – 8 months constantly, due to the anxiety disorder) I started feeling my chest, and felt my sternum (bone in between rib cage) After feeling it, I even knew what this was, but for some reason, the second I touched it I had the worst panic attack ever, it was the same symptoms as all the others explained but this time I couldn’t breathe, this time I new I was going mad. I called a taxi and went up to the hospital, they hooked me up to an ECG machine. Whilst waiting for the machine to monitor the results, the nurse said to me, if its all okay you can go home straight away, if there are any cause for concerns we will take you next door and you will be evaluated by one of the doctors. The results came through and the nurse said she would like the doctor to evaluate me, so instantly, I panicked again, no panic attack though... I just felt extremely nervous. I laid down on a hospital bed for an hour, every now and again, a nurse would come over and offer me some water, and talk to me about Uni and any assignments coming up. I said that they are all handed in (I done most of my work early) and she would go. The doctor finally came over, looking at some data on paper and started asking me questions about University, he told me to stop drinking energy drinks and alcohol, he said how damaging they can be. For some reason, I just couldn't tell him I hadn't drunk for 6 months, for some reason, I felt like I was being told off, for causing this to myself and I wasn't even drinking energy drinks etc. He then said I can go home, but something stuck in my head, why did the nurse not send me straight home? There was obvious signs of stress on my heart, of which the machine picked up... but instead of asking further questions and examining me further they shrugged it off as “Uni Lad” drinking to much and not getting enough sleep. I felt even more let down, and made me even more worried about sharing this problem with others.

Anxiety was also extremely damaging on my sleep. I was getting extremely bad sleep paralysis, sleep paralysis is a condition where you are basically paralysed on your bed, you can't move, your chest hurts and when you try to move other parts of your body it hurts. This continued for a few months, I finally got round to looking up what the problem was, and that was when I came across sleep paralysis and how common it was in anxiety sufferers. To summarise, the process of sleep is that your brain shuts off your body, and then shuts off itself, the issue with sleep paralysis is that it doesn’t shut off the brain properly and you are left in a paralysed state, sometimes for hours.

Occasionally, I would be to scared to sleep so I would sit up in the communal area in the building I lived in. Watching TV occasionally someone would come in from their night out, and have a chat, which was my favourite part of my day. I knew I needed to take action, the university had a mental health department of which I made an appointment and went. After explaining everything to someone for the first time, it felt great however was short lived, as the only thing that any of these doctors and consultants wanted to do was to put me on tablets, more specifically Anti Depressants. I refused, I explained that this is a condition caused by my own mind, is it not? So why treat it with something else? I simply refused, I was not depressed, if anything I still used to get out of the flat, and do stuff. I'd go shopping etc, I didn’t completely isolate myself. I just wanted the nerves, the panic attacks and lack of sleep to stop, the feeling of walking on clouds and not ever actually feeling present to stop. Once again, I felt extremely let down.

This is when it all changed, I went to bed one evening and was feeling stressed as usual, couldn’t sleep, when I almost did I would have another sleep paralysis episode which would result in another panic attack. So I got up and made my way over to the communal area in the building. I watched some TV and fell asleep.

The following day I spent the entire time in the common room, which people coming in and out, having a little chat and off they went. However one of the chats I had with someone changed my life forever. A girl, who I knew from the building sat down and asked me why I am always up late in the common room. I explained how hard I was finding it to sleep, due to anxiety problems, I mentioned a little about panic attacks but didn't go into to much detail, after all, what did she know? Well, it turned out she was in-fact studying a degree in Psychology. She explained to me that a large part of anxiety is excess energy and a great way of helping would be to exercise. It just made complete sense, my heart is beating 3 times faster than normal, so lets give it something to beat about. That day I ran, I ran for miles, for hours. I remember running into the night ending up extremely far away, and into the night. I just didn’t care, I just kept running. I left in the early afternoon and arrived home early hours of the morning. I got in, and felt amazing, I didn’t have a care in the world. My heart was tired, it was tired of beating fast and started warming down into a resting heart rate. I was also to tired to worry, I was to tired to care about any problems I was having, I just wanted to have a shower and sleep, lets just say I didn’t make it out of my towel before sleeping for a full 9 hours, as cliché as it sounds I could not believe it.

The next day I went swimming for hours followed by a run home, I then done some University work followed by another run, all this exercise made me want to eat well, so my diet improved dramatically. And there it was, my new lifestyle, 3 months on and not one panic attack, this felt extremely strange, as a panic attack everyday for months on end really takes it's toll. I was cured, and not only that my entire life improved, I felt more confident and was taking my exercise to a new level.

I learnt an extremely valuable lesson that day, bottling up your emotions and problems can be extremely damaging and although sharing them to the wrong people may not help, you might just get lucky like I did, and get the person that can really help. They did not recommend tablets, or pills or regular therapy sessions. They recommended the most important aspect your mind and body was designed for and that was exercise. I cant even remember If I ever thanked this person. And maybe one day I will get the chance to, however the bigger picture of all this is Anxiety affects millions of people, and I can understand the life changing affects this disorder can have on your life.

Anxiety at times can be complex, and be completely different for everybody however in my case, my heart was beating too fast, I was panicking and after time it was causing me long term affects such as panic attacks and sleep deprivation. Panic attacks are also known as fight or flight response, because your body is ready for either a fight, or to fly (run away)... I did just that, and have not had a problem in the last 4 years. During this time, I have encountered a lot of people, friends with the same problems I had. They also took these steps and advice I was given and their Anxiety improved dramatically. I remember during my 6 – 8 months of terrible anxiety looking up various solutions online on forums and blogs, of which thousands of other people were in the same boat. All I needed was a forum or blog post like this one which is why I have created this, and I am thankful every day that this one person, on this particular occasion could help me the way she did.
Wow...what an amazing success story :)