Muscle pain and tenderness...here it goes again

[Kaylee Quinlan]

Everytime the doctors rule out something (like a specific cancer) I start to think it could be some other kind. My symptoms started off as a swollen lymph node and trouble swallowing, then pneumonia, joint pain, muscle twitches in my left leg, heart palpitations, not sleeping, sweating at night. In the past 2 months I have thought I had lymphoma, leukemia, esophageal cancer, brain tumors, lung cancer, bone cancer, and now im worried about some sort of muscle tumors or something (dont even know if its possible). I have had numerous blood tests (only thing they ever showed was low potassium a few days ago). I have had a dozen chest xrays (never showed anything), a neck cat scan (did not show the one enlarged lymph node), 2 chest cat scans (one that showed pneumonia, a follow up that showed pneumonia had cleared). A finger xray (which did show a tiny spot in between one of the joints), a leg xray (showed nothing). Once I found out the pneumonia had gone away, I was no longer convinced I had lung cancer. I was fine for about 2 days, than I notice that my finger and leg start to hurt really bad again. I immediately jump to bone cancer, it didnt help that they found a small spot on my finger joint, the emergency room doctor didnt think it was a tumor. Then I get the leg scan and it shows nothing wrong with my leg bone, so I jump to my muscles. Numerous doctors have told me I just have anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder and panic attacks. I believe that is true but I just cant seem to convince myself that is the only thing going on. I feel like everytime I go to the doctor they dismiss me because I have been to the doctor so many times and have had so many tests done. Im afraid because I have anxiety they are going to miss something awful. I keep googling my symptoms, which I know is bad, and sometimes it puts me at ease because I know anxiety can cause almost all of these issues, but than I remember the lymph node and the spot on my finger (those cant be caused by anxiety I dont think). I have always had a little problem with anxiety but never this bad. It has completely taken over my life. Why cant I just accept the fact that I probably dont have a serious illness and move on? I just want these pains to go away and I want my life back. I want to work and be a mom again. I want to get my degree and become a probation officer. I just want to be normal again. Am I dying, do I have some awful disease or am I just dealing with mental disorders? I just wish I knew 100% for sure that I am healthy. Another new symptom I am having is twitches right below my left rib. the thing that concerns me is that except for the lymph node on the right side of my neck all the pain is on the left side. No pain on the right side of my body. what is wrong with me, I dont want to die. Im too young and my kids are too young. HELP!!!!!!

[embrace123]

I'm going through it to dont feel alone

[Kaylee Quinlan]

I just cant help but dwell on having some kind of cancer. I have read that my symptoms could be caused by some sort of muscle tumors or brain tumors....ahhhhh!!!! cant take it!

[mykids12]

I have every single symptom you do and more as far as the bone pain. Plus I have peripheral neuropathy symptoms too. I'm in the middle if being tested for an auto immune disease because I have way too many of the symptoms for me to sit back and overlook. If all the tests come out fine I'm sure I'll still worry but I need to be tested for my piece of mind. I hate that I go in with real symptoms and drs blow me off saying its anxiety and don't even take one look at my complaints. But just wanted you to know I have everything you do :)

[embrace123]

I swear I have heart problems because I'm in constant pain on left side I've had 9ekgs

[Kaylee Quinlan]

Im glad that I know that im not the only one experiencing these symptoms. Mykids12 I am starting to have the doctors look at auto immune disorders as well. Like you said I have way too many symptoms to just ignore and autoimmune disorders run in my family. I have seriously had every part of my body checked, except the brain, but I would like to think I dont have a brain tumor. Its just pure craziness how many cancers I have gone through in the last 2 months. The local ER has seen me so many times that one time I had to wait 4 hours for them to bring me back. They took every other patient with minor problems before they called me back. I was the only one in the waiting room when they called me. So now because I have been so worried about multiple things and have had so many tests doctors are starting to not believe me. Luckily I have a regular doctor that I see every 2 weeks now. He wont do any further testing until I get my anxiety under control but how is that ever going to happen if I dont know something is wrong with me or not. I have no patience what so ever and my life has been totally ruined by this. People have tried telling me that even people that have been diagnosed with cancers make the most out of life. A cancer patient told me "you dont have cancer until you are diagnosed" I wish it was easier to live by that but when you are in constant pain and worrying its hard to not think something is wrong. Eachtime they tell me I dont have a certain cancer I stop worrying for about one day and than im back to worrrying oh it could be this kind of cancer, why didnt i think about that before. Its just crazy and I would just like to feel normal again and live my life normally again. Everytime I go to bed I feel like im going to die in my sleep. Embrace123 I have had numerous EKGs done as well! I think at the rate im going with all this worry im going to die of a heart attack before I die of anything else.

[embrace123]

Do you ever have Heart symptoms?

[mykids12]

Im glad that I know that im not the only one experiencing these symptoms. Mykids12 I am starting to have the doctors look at auto immune disorders as well. Like you said I have way too many symptoms to just ignore and autoimmune disorders run in my family. I have seriously had every part of my body checked, except the brain, but I would like to think I dont have a brain tumor. Its just pure craziness how many cancers I have gone through in the last 2 months. The local ER has seen me so many times that one time I had to wait 4 hours for them to bring me back. They took every other patient with minor problems before they called me back. I was the only one in the waiting room when they called me. So now because I have been so worried about multiple things and have had so many tests doctors are starting to not believe me. Luckily I have a regular doctor that I see every 2 weeks now. He wont do any further testing until I get my anxiety under control but how is that ever going to happen if I dont know something is wrong with me or not. I have no patience what so ever and my life has been totally ruined by this. People have tried telling me that even people that have been diagnosed with cancers make the most out of life. A cancer patient told me "you dont have cancer until you are diagnosed" I wish it was easier to live by that but when you are in constant pain and worrying its hard to not think something is wrong. Eachtime they tell me I dont have a certain cancer I stop worrying for about one day and than im back to worrrying oh it could be this kind of cancer, why didnt i think about that before. Its just crazy and I would just like to feel normal again and live my life normally again. Everytime I go to bed I feel like im going to die in my sleep. Embrace123 I have had numerous EKGs done as well! I think at the rate im going with all this worry im going to die of a heart attack before I die of anything else.

That's how I feel. I don't go to the ER but I almost did once but didn't. Hopefully the dr I see Monday will take me seriously. All these joint pains and stuff are not just anxiety and depression. It's ridiculous.

[mbie11]

I get pretty much all of these symptoms like everyday. It's definitely anxiety related